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Stay At Home Humor

T_R_Oglodyte

T_R_Oglodyte

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Quips from Dorothy Parker:
"If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised"
“Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.”
“If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.”
“The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.”
“Don't look at me in that tone of voice.”
“This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it."
“Brevity is the soul of lingerie.”
“That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say 'No' in any of them.”
 
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U

Ubil

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A conversation with my wife while she is driving. I have a lot of medications. I remarked about a headache. She says, "We have a pill for that!" (Old joke, but good.)

I looked at the dashboard of the car. The car could say, "I have a button for that!"
 
T_R_Oglodyte

T_R_Oglodyte

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Ubil said:
A conversation with my wife while she is driving. I have a lot of medications. I remarked about a headache. She says, "We have a pill for that!" (Old joke, but good.)

I looked at the dashboard of the car. The car could say, "I have a button for that!"
Click to expand...

Thank you, Alex. I'll continue with Conversations with Wives for $200.

True story. I'm in a department store with my wife, while she is looking for clothes. She says she is looking for a red top. I know her sizes, and what she wears well. I browse some nearby racks, and I find a top that I know is wonderful. So, I bring it to her and ask, "what about this"?. She looks at it and says, "Nope. That;'s not red. That's strawberry."

Silly me. For all of my life up to that point, I had been thinking that strawberries are red.
 
Makai Guy

Makai Guy

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I live near enough to Georgia that I see the Georgia Lottery ads on TV. No matter how many times I see this one, it always gives me a chuckle. For those of you in other areas ...

 
T_R_Oglodyte

T_R_Oglodyte

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Makai Guy said:
I live near enough to Georgia that I see the Georgia Lottery ads on TV. No matter how many times I see this one, it always gives me a chuckle. For those of you in other areas ...

Click to expand...
Living in the Northwest, this ad always make me laugh. Except it doesn't appear on TV any more, so you have to seek it out.

 
Tank

Tank

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HICV South Beach Myrtle Beach
HICV Lake Geneva
HICV Gatlinburg
HICV Orange Lake Kissemee
IMG_7275.jpeg
 
Tank

Tank

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HICV Lake Geneva
HICV Gatlinburg
HICV Orange Lake Kissemee
IMG_7274.jpeg
 
Tank

Tank

TUG Member
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Location
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HICV South Beach Myrtle Beach
HICV Lake Geneva
HICV Gatlinburg
HICV Orange Lake Kissemee
IMG_7271.jpeg
 
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