Stay At Home Humor

[Passepartout]

 

[Tank]

 

[plpgma]

 

[plpgma]

 

[plpgma]

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[Tank]

 

[Tank]

 

[Ralph Sir Edward]

 

[plpgma]

 

[plpgma]

 

[plpgma]

 

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[plpgma]

 

[Ken555]

 

[Tank]

 

[Tank]

 

[Ken555]

 

[clifffaith]

View attachment 31632

Worse than the empty box in the pantry -- the box with one cookie! 38 years and I haven't been able to break him of that habit.

 

[DaveNV]

Worse than the empty box in the pantry -- the box with one cookie! 38 years and I haven't been able to break him of that habit.

It may not be entirely Cliff's fault:

Whenever my older brother would ask my Mom if he could have the last cookie, she'd go nuts, and yell, "Sure, sure! Take the LAST ONE, so there's none for anybody else!" One day my brother responded with, "OK, I will!" and he ate it. Mom went off on him, and smacked the hell out of him for taking the last cookie.

So maybe Cliff knew my Mother. LOL!

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Mrs. Ravioli comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner.

He lives with a female roommate, Maria.

During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how
pretty Anthony's roommate is.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact,
she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his
roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, Anthony volunteered, "I know what you
must be thinking, but I assure you, Maria and I are just roommates.''

About a week later, Maria came to Anthony saying, "Ever since your mother
came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't suppose
she took it, do you?"

"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure."

So he sat down and wrote an email:

Dear MaMa,
I'm not saying that you "did" take the sugar bowl from my house;
I'm not saying that you "did not" take it. But the fact remains that it
has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Your Loving Son,
Anthony

Several days later, Anthony received a response email from his MaMa which read:

Dear Son,
I'm not saying that you "do" sleep with Maria,
and I'm not saying that you "do not" sleep with her.
But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed,
she would have found the sugar bowl by now.

Your Loving MaMa

Moral:
Never Bulla Shitta your MaMa

******************************

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Got a new pair of loafers.

Dave

 

[LannyPC]

Mrs. Ravioli comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner.

He lives with a female roommate, Maria.

During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how
pretty Anthony's roommate is.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact,
she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his
roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, Anthony volunteered, "I know what you
must be thinking, but I assure you, Maria and I are just roommates.''

About a week later, Maria came to Anthony saying, "Ever since your mother
came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't suppose
she took it, do you?"

"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure."

So he sat down and wrote an email:

Dear MaMa,
I'm not saying that you "did" take the sugar bowl from my house;
I'm not saying that you "did not" take it. But the fact remains that it
has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Your Loving Son,
Anthony

Several days later, Anthony received a response email from his MaMa which read:

Dear Son,
I'm not saying that you "do" sleep with Maria,
and I'm not saying that you "do not" sleep with her.
But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed,
she would have found the sugar bowl by now.

Your Loving MaMa

I heard that joke a number of years ago except it was a veteran priest who had an attractive housekeeper and the visitor was a young, rookie priest. And, for some reason, the "missing" valuable was a gold-plated serving utensil.

I also heard it before the popularity of e-mail so, in the joke, the veteran priest calls the rookie priest into his office to get to the bottom of things.

 

[DaveNV]

I heard that joke a number of years ago except it was a veteran priest who had an attractive housekeeper and the visitor was a young, rookie priest. And, for some reason, the "missing" valuable was a gold-plated serving utensil.

I also heard it before the popularity of e-mail so, in the joke, the veteran priest calls the rookie priest into his office to get to the bottom of things.

Yep. I've heard it a number of ways as well. The missing item in one was a large soup spoon. I another, a gravy boat. The idea is the same, and the punch line is always funny.

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave