Frustrated with my other half, I just can’t get him to understand the risks

[isisdave]

My son works at a Lowe's in Indiana, in Seasonal and Inside Garden. He says that everything having to do with gardening (spring is beginning there) and outdoor live is flying out the door. He sold 13 riding lawnmowers the other day.

And paint sales are very brisk.

 

[goaliedave]

Doesn’t surprise me, one of the few places to go plus many are buying things to do projects. They should do what groceries are doing, limiting how many can enter at a time. I know our Lowe’s still have regular hours, whereas Home Depot is closing at 6pm.

Yikes are stores near you guys enforcing distancing? We have inside markings at cashes, in aisles everyone is waiting and keeping 6 feet, outside we have security letting in only when someone leaves and lineups 6 feet apart. Why no physical dustancing in stores?

Sent from my SM-A505G using Tapatalk

 

[pedro47]

Please stay in if you can. Wishing you guys some tranquility time.

 

[Panina]

As I continue to internally struggle as my other half goes to a store, it is less often and he is finally getting it, understanding the severity.

This is what he said last night... your mom shouldn’t be in NY now, she should come here. I said how would she get here? I can drive up to get her he said. My mother doesn’t like him and he knows but still he cares.

Asked mom she said no.

 

[rapmarks]

My husband is getting very antsy, complaining because we are not doing anything. Went to Culver’s for a drive through sundae but can’t think of anything else. It is 95 here this weekend. I like to try to walk in the evening. He says he can only walk real slow and not far, but won’t let me go by myself.

 

[Talent312]

My husband is getting very antsy, complaining because we are not doing anything. Went to Culver’s for a drive through sundae but can’t think of anything else...

Arby's milkshakes are pretty good.
Another option is a picnic. Many local parks are still open.
.

.

 

[pedro47]

Today we had our First Zoom luncheon in front of our desktop computers and tablets at home. We talked about everything from no NCAA & NBA Basketball games, no Major League Baseball games on television and including that Coronavirus subject. There were no sit down big meals or drinks and there were no big smiles, hand shakes or hugs. . We were more than six (6) feets apart.

Footnote, we do not discuss any politics. That is the one subject that have been and will always be offlimit during our private luncheon.

We were finish with our Zoom luncheon in less than 45 minutes. We normally take two (2) hours or more for lunch.
We all stated at the end: we missed the live fellowship and our time to eat and relax together..

We normally get together once per month at a difference restaurant in Newport News, Hampton or in Williamsburg, VA.

 

[lockewong]

As I continue to internally struggle as my other half goes to a store, it is less often and he is finally getting it, understanding the severity.

This is what he said last night... your mom shouldn’t be in NY now, she should come here. I said how would she get here? I can drive up to get her he said. My mother doesn’t like him and he knows but still he cares.

Asked mom she said no.

Reading through this, your DH loves you and does care. He is going through repressed emotions about the move and now, this pandemic, makes him scared. My husband also accedes to my wishes. But, when he does speak, I listen. He does crazy stuff in my view but he has a good heart. I believe, and I truly believe, you gave everything for your Step-daughter's well-being and you husband's needs. You did sacrifice. She is stable and mentally and emotionally well because of you. I believe he knows what you have done; consequently, despite the difference, as he wants the best for your mother... despite any complications; so he put his misgivings aside and offered to help your mother, since it troubles you so. I. also believe that because your DH and you have given sooo much and understand each others' sacrifices, it will be okay. He is coping and you are coping. It may on its face sound disrespectful that he goes out to "shop" but I really, really, believe both of you care for each other and that makes all the difference. IMHO.

 

[Panina]

It’s two weeks since my last post on this topic so I thought I would post an update.

Who am I living with? It is not the same person a month ago or even two weeks ago.

As I said prior, I let go. I began following what my core believes in, the serenity prayer...
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.

The only thing I could change was me. I went about doing what I needed for me. Within time he adjusted, calmed down, didn’t run to stores. Not sure why he changed. He is smiling now, kind and thoughtful.

When I first wrote this I questioned if our relationship would survive this, now I think maybe this whole crisis saved our relationship. Time will tell as we all have a long road to travel.

 

[elaine]

Panina, that is great! And I'm so happy that we were here to support each other ! We're all in it together. Who even cares about timeshares anymore!
Elaine

 

[Panina]

Panina, that is great! And I'm so happy that we were here to support each other ! We're all in it together. Who even cares about timeshares anymore!
Elaine

Tug has always been so much more then Timeshares. It is even more evident now. The friendships that evolve are gifts and the support many of us give each other is priceless.

 

[R.J.C.]

I am so frustrated, I am being so careful, staying in now. My other half has been out each day. Today to the supermarket just for 4 items which he really didn’t need and just now he went to Lowe’s to get a caulking gun. I can’t get him to understand that unnecessary trips should not be made. I consider myself lucky that his gym closed or he would go there too. Any one having issue like this with their other half?

If you can't handle your other half living his life as he sees fit then maybe you need a different half. He should not have to give up his freedom because you are scared.

 

[Panina]

If you can't handle your other half living his life as he sees fit then maybe you need a different half. He should not have to give up his freedom because you are scared.

A relationship is 50/50. Compassion, caring and compromise by both in a relationship is what makes it endure. Those who think that always living their life the way they want, not taking their loved ones into consideration, are the ones that shouldn’t be in a relationship. They should stay single.

Your view that I asked him to give up his freedom is not what this was about. It was about following guidelines that were established by our township to keep safe.

 

[R.J.C.]

A relationship is 50/50. Compassion, caring and compromise by both in a relationship is what makes it endure. Those who think that always living their life the way they want, not taking their loved ones into consideration, are the ones that shouldn’t be in a relationship. They should stay single.

Your view that I asked him to give up his freedom is not what this was about. It was about following guidelines that were established by our township to keep safe.

Correct. 50/50, not 100/0. Asking him to somewhat change his ways and in return you won't nag him when he does go out is 50/50. Saying "Are you stupid? Why are you going out?! Stop it!!" is not compromise.

Been married almost 32 years so I understand the difference.

 

[R.J.C.]

IMO, it's obvious y'all have never put your life on the line to defend the freedoms we have otherwise you wouldn't be so quick to relinquish those freedoms to the government, especially when anyone who wants to stay inside and away from others can easily do so. Those of us who wish to go outside are only walking around others of the same mindset which doesn't affect any of y'all in the slightest.

 

[CalGalTraveler]

@Panina Glad this worked out for you.

 

[Panina]

Correct. 50/50, not 100/0. Asking him to somewhat change his ways and in return you won't nag him when he does go out is 50/50. Saying "Are you stupid? Why are you going out?! Stop it!!" is not compromise.

Been married almost 32 years so I understand the difference.

Assumptions are not facts.

I was with my deceased husband total 27 years, a few months short 25 years married, with current going on 9 years so don’t lecture me on the difference.

Nor do I need a lecture on freedom as both of my men served in the military many years, 32 years combined. Plus my whole family freedoms were taken away from them in the worse way possible due to the holocaust. And let me not forget my dad fighting in the underground for his freedom and others. He saved many.

If you can’t help yourself keep going but I an done. Said what I had to.

 

[ilene13]

My other half is a physician so he's going to work. He wears scrubs instead of street clothes and throws them into the washing machine as soon as he gets home. We are both on the same page with everything else. We only go out when absolutely necessary and then with masks and gloves!!

 

[pedro47]

Yesterday at Safeway, they still have the self serve operating. I was shocked since buffets have been shut down because everyone touches the serving utensils. I saw people serving themselves at Safeway.

I have not seen a buffet in a supermarket open since this coronavirus started In Virginia.. Someone needs to report this Safeway store to their local health department or their state Department of Health .ASAP.

 

[rickandcindy23]

Really, a buffet type salad bar at a local store should be left unused. Spoiled food would make for a change on the store's part.

I hope our local restaurants all survive. I am concerned for all small businesses. The grocery stores are doing huge business, and people are hoarding food. I was shocked that our local stores are out of ranch dressing, the Litehouse brand I buy. So I made my own today for my salad later.

 

[Panina]

My other half is a physician so he's going to work. He wears scrubs instead of street clothes and throws them into the washing machine as soon as he gets home. We are both on the same page with everything else. We only go out when absolutely necessary and then with masks and gloves!!

Your other half is a soldier on the frontline, keeping us healthy. All physicians are, no matter in what capacity they are working in.

No words can completely express my gratitude to your other half and all the physicians and their families for all they are doing now.

 

[Brett]

I have not seen a buffet in a supermarket open since this coronavirus started In Virginia.. Someone needs to report this Safeway store to their local health department or their state Department of Health .ASAP.

that post was from March 17, the buffet lines have been closed in Va. (and probably other states) for some time

 

[pedro47]

Please forget me Panina, but sometimes you sound just liked my other half. My Commander of Chief. LOL.
The Love of my Life.

I enjoy been busy and I also, enjoy going to Lowe’s and Home Depot regularly and I liked having a cup of coffee with a biscuit at our various local fast food restaurants

However, I am standing home and inside..I have not travel to Lowe’s or Home Depot in 72 hours. I am only going out of the house to pick up our mail and the newspaper from my brick mailbox and newspaper holder.

I am praying for your spouse.

 

[MrockStar]

My son works at a Lowe's in Indiana, in Seasonal and Inside Garden. He says that everything having to do with gardening (spring is beginning there) and outdoor live is flying out the door. He sold 13 riding lawnmowers the other day.

And paint sales are very brisk.

 

[MrockStar]

Great i wonder how far the closest lowe's Indianna is to MI so i can plant my garden there ??