Frustrated with my other half, I just can’t get him to understand the risks

[rapmarks]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

 

[VacationForever]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

You have to remind yourself that he has dementia and treat his question as a new question every time. I am sorry, a family caregiver has the hardest job in the world.

 

[Panina]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

My dad was the same way. It can get frustrating. Maybe you can write it down and have him read it each morning or record it and you can play it each day.

 

[bluehende]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

Sending you a thousand digital hugs to use as needed. I know how unbelievably hard this situation can be under ordinary stress levels.

 

[Panina]

Now this is almost unbelievable coming from my other half. I heard him lecturing his daughter on the phone tonight on how she needs to stay out of stores as much as possible and must use all precautions when she goes.

He told her a story about a woman who self quarantined for weeks, prior going to drug store once, and once a friend left groceries at her door. She now has the virus as does the friend who delivered the groceries. His point was how easily it spreads.

 

[VacationForever]

Now this is almost unbelievable coming from my other half. I heard him lecturing his daughter on the phone tonight on how she needs to stay out of stores as much as possible and must use all precautions when she goes.

He told her a story about a woman who self quarantined for weeks, prior going to drug store once, and once a friend left groceries at her door. She now has the virus as does the friend who delivered the groceries. His point was how easily it spreads.

Wonderful that he gets it and now he is telling others to be safe.

 

[wackymother]

Now this is almost unbelievable coming from my other half. I heard him lecturing his daughter on the phone tonight on how she needs to stay out of stores as much as possible and must use all precautions when she goes.

He told her a story about a woman who self quarantined for weeks, prior going to drug store once, and once a friend left groceries at her door. She now has the virus as does the friend who delivered the groceries. His point was how easily it spreads.

Wait, really? Where did this happen, the story about the woman with the groceries? Bc I haven't heard about anything definitely being transferred from groceries or deliveries.

 

[queenofthehive]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

Everyone should be able to vent. It helps during difficult times.

 

[rapmarks]

Everyone should be able to vent. It helps during difficult times.

Yes, thank you, it felt good to vent

 

[Panina]

Yes, thank you, it felt good to vent

Always here for you.

 

[Panina]

Wait, really? Where did this happen, the story about the woman with the groceries? Bc I haven't heard about anything definitely being transferred from groceries or deliveries.

Who really knows. The facts are only as good as the person telling them. Here is the article he referenced.

North Carolina woman gets coronavirus despite staying home for three weeks

A North Carolina coronavirus patient said she was infected despite staying home for the three weeks leading up to her diagnosis last Thursday, a report said. “This is the sickest I’ve ever been and…

nypost.com

 

[Sugarcubesea]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

I can only imagine how frustrating you must feel and be right now as the sole caregiver for your hubby with no one to really help you... I hope that you can maybe try and take a break for even a few minutes and that might give you the strength to tell him again what I know you have already told him many times previously... Your always in my thoughts and prayers....

 

[VacationForever]

deleted

 

[WinniWoman]

No, You Don't Need To Disinfect Your Groceries. But Here's How To Shop Safely

Coronavirus got you nervous about grocery shopping? We talked to scientists for their advice about how to stay safe at the store — and when handling food back home.

www.npr.org

 

[WinniWoman]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

Prayers for you and your husband. I don't know how you do it. You are a very strong woman.

 

[Glynda]

My husband is wandering. He has been picking up the groceries I order online for curbside pickup and two meals we ordered for takeout from restaurants in the neighborhood. But last week he declared that he was going to Costco. That terrified me. However, nothing I could say could dissuade him. It seemed to work out. Though I have plenty of household chores he could do, he prefers to volunteer at the theater across the street (Alone, they are closed but he has a key.). He's cleaned the set department workshop, painted the garage door as well as the entrance door and I suspect he's repairing some wood rot over there. He already maintains half of the alley outside of the theater (alley owned by the city). My biggest concern is that he runs into too many people to talk to when working on the alley. The theater doesn't worry me. I just wish he's expend that energy here.

 

[leadfoone]

Who really knows. The facts are only as good as the person telling them. Here is the article he referenced.

North Carolina woman gets coronavirus despite staying home for three weeks

A North Carolina coronavirus patient said she was infected despite staying home for the three weeks leading up to her diagnosis last Thursday, a report said. “This is the sickest I’ve ever been and…

nypost.com

Since they are not totally sure how people get it... and since testing is still not widely available to everyone she could have had it before she sheltered in place. They say it comes on slowly. All you can do is take as many precautions as possible to not get it.

 

[Glynda]

Talk about being frustrated with your other half. I just spent half an hour explaining to mine AGAIN why we aren’t doing anything tomorrow, why we aren’t flying north,why we don’t drive the 2400 miles with me being the only driver, why I didn’t take him somewhere today. he has me so worked up it will be another night not being able to get to sleep.

I understand your frustration. It's so hard to be a caregiver. We've had my mother for 8 years now and at first it was a blessing as was so active, loves to cook and eat her own food so became our cook and even sometimes laundress. Now, at 98, she's waning and very slow moving. Her very sharp mind of a year or more ago is showing some signs of confusion. She forgets about this virus thing from time to time. I was taking an online Italian test in a Zoom classroom yesterday when she walked through and started handling the groceries that I'd had to leave on the "contaminated area" of the kitchen because I ran out of time to wipe them down, put them away and clean the area before the test. I wanted to yell at her not to touch but the class could have heard me so had to ask the professor if I could take a minute to speak to my mother. Since New Year's she's been on pureed food only. But she has walked into the kitchen and taken a spoonful of what I'm cooking, prior to pureeing, to check it out! Two days ago she told me wanted a grilled cheese sandwich. Last night, she wanted a BLT. Both times when her dinner was ready. Not happening. Pureeing three items separately that I've cooked, washing the processor in between, often leaves my food cold by the time I finish hers. She won't take her meds like she should but complains of pain. She won't put eyedrops in her dry eyes saying she just can't. She needs help dressing and undressing and with the upkeep of her room. I'm worn out, burned out. I feel guilty that I sometimes mourn and resent the time we've lost of our retirement when otherwise we would be able to travel. I just have to keep reminding myself of all that she has been to us and done for us.

 

[Cornell]

Too all you caregivers, I give you my support. I cannot even imagine how hard it must be.

 

[rapmarks]

If we go out on a walk, my husband will get real close to anyone who will talk to him. I have been helping make masks for fire department, and had to bring him along to bring in what I had cut,and there he is going right up to people.

 

[Panina]

My husband is wandering. He has been picking up the groceries I order online for curbside pickup and two meals we ordered for takeout from restaurants in the neighborhood. But last week he declared that he was going to Costco. That terrified me. However, nothing I could say could dissuade him. It seemed to work out. Though I have plenty of household chores he could do, he prefers to volunteer at the theater across the street (Alone, they are closed but he has a key.). He's cleaned the set department workshop, painted the garage door as well as the entrance door and I suspect he's repairing some wood rot over there. He already maintains half of the alley outside of the theater (alley owned by the city). My biggest concern is that he runs into too many people to talk to when working on the alley. The theater doesn't worry me. I just wish he's expend that energy here.

I understand the moment of being terrified. I was too. Then I realized no matter how careful we think we are there will still be risk. We will be living with this for awhile and for many of us we will need to venture out. As long as we take precautions we have been told about our risk will not be as high. Life will go on and we have no choice but to adjust.

 

[clifffaith]

I have not seen a buffet in a supermarket open since this coronavirus started In Virginia.. Someone needs to report this Safeway store to their local health department or their state Department of Health .ASAP.

The aisle monitor at Von's was a wealth of info today. We were standing where she could hear us when I told Cliff to go find his free donuts and free loaf of French bread from our Monopoly coupons. She immediately piped up with "no self serve donuts, but you can use two donut coupons to buy a two pack". I wouldn't be surprised if it takes a long time for most of the self serve stuff to come back. We got self serve nuts at Sprouts when this first started, but a day later couldn't grind our own coffee at Smart & Final. Now S&F is back to letting us grind coffee -- not sure what they are doing with all the nuts/candy/flour bins at Sprouts because we don't go there very often.

 

[Panina]

No, You Don't Need To Disinfect Your Groceries. But Here's How To Shop Safely

Coronavirus got you nervous about grocery shopping? We talked to scientists for their advice about how to stay safe at the store — and when handling food back home.

www.npr.org

No one really know for sure all the ways we get this. What we are told is ok today can be different tomorrow. We just can try to do our best.

 

[VacationForever]

I understand the moment of being terrified. I was too. Then I realized no matter how careful we think we are there will still be risk. We will be living with this for awhile and for many of us we will need to venture out. As long as we take precautions we have been told about our risk will not be as high. Life will go on and we have no choice but to adjust.

Our PCP was very clear: Stay home and do not go to any store or anywhere. We got clearance from him to golf in our cart with no one else and since that is not an option anymore we are literally stuck here in the home 24x7 except to bring in boxes and letters and we take lots of precaution when handling them.

 

[Panina]

If we go out on a walk, my husband will get real close to anyone who will talk to him. I have been helping make masks for fire department, and had to bring him along to bring in what I had cut,and there he is going right up to people.

Even those who fully get it are still doing that. It is habit for most. Multiple times this week a neighbor was outside and just came walking up to us. Each time I had to say back up, 6 ft distance. Seems people think 3 ft is 6 feet. Just now we went to my other half’s off site garage and the manager, who also lives in our development, saw us drive in and started walking to our car and I had to tell him too close.