Stressful week, icing our car got hit, surprised how I reacted

[Panina]

It has been a tough week. After being sick with the flu and sinus infection I finally got to leave for my Florida winter vacation only missing the first week. I got here Saturday.

One day here and my cousin who is like a sister has a stroke. I was ready to fly immediately back but didn’t have to. It was caught in time and there will be no lasting effects. I have been talking to the doctors from here and other family members and friends are helping too.

On top of that the new medicine mom has been taking for her blood pressure since she had an allergic reaction to her old one isn’t working well, her pressure is high. She refused to listen and take an increased dosage. In person she would never argue. I am grateful when I left a message with her doctor that she won’t take it, he immediately called her and she is now listening.

Today was the icing on the cake. Our car was stopped in traffic for about 30 seconds and boom the car behind us crashes into us. He was stopped too. It was the car behind him that crashed into him. The driver admitted to the police officer she hit the accelerator instead of the brake. The car behind us was smashed front and back, probably a total. He was a tourist from Finland. The car that smashed into him had pushed in damage in the front. Our car lower bumper and exhaust damaged, upper bumper scratched. I was surprised it was not pushed in as the impact was harsh. We have a Jeep Cherokee and I was impressed.

No one was badly hurt. I am sore but it will pass.

What surprised me about this was how I reacted. The woman who caused the accident, after the police arrived and we were waiting for the reports, was crying in her car . I went over. She kept saying she was sorry. I comforted her, told her it happens, none of us are hurt and we are not mad at her. The other guy was kind too. We all left saying goodbye on good terms.

I realized life happens. What I didn’t know is what has happened in the woman’s life. Maybe something sad occurred in her life, maybe she lost her job, maybe nothing and it was an accident that if she was more alert wouldn’t have happened. I don’t know. What I do know is kindness was the path I took and I am happy I did.

Why am I sharing this? Because I could have been the woman that caused the accident as so much was going on in my life that has stressed me out.

What I am trying to convey, kindness can go a long way in most situations. We never know what someone is experiencing. Would me being upset at her make the situation any better? No, not for me or her.

 

[dstacy969]

Very well said.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Big Matt]

Make sure you go get checked out if you have any pain or muscle spasms. I had a very similar accident this past summer where a man plowed into me from behind in stop and go traffic. I was just trying to make sure we both didn't get killed as we got our cars off the busy toll road and didn't feel pain either. Later, I got muscle spasms in my neck and didn't think much of it. Fast forward six months and I've been in and out of the doctor's office many times and am seeing a chiropractor. I have three slipped disks and may have ongoing pain for the rest of my life.

 

[rapmarks]

If you are down here in southwest Florida, the driving is so erratic. Just yesterday I slowed too much at a roundabout and the person behind me just kept his hand on the horn until I let the car already in the roundabout by instead of cutting him off. Then he raced around me and went down the road going at least 70 in a 40 mph zone. There was a three car accident going into the park for bocce.
So thankful you were near medical help for your cousin and that she is okay.

 

[Beachclubmum]

Yeah, stressful definitely sums up your week! Glad things weren’t worse and thank you for your kindness in a bad situation. The world needs more people like that.

 

[am1]

My wife feels the same way when there is a collision. Things happen but if people are not capable of driving in a safe manner they just avoid it until they can. Otherwise they are putting their life and others at risk.

 

[Bailey#1]

When the person who causes the accident feels remorse, it is easy to show compassion towards them. I seen accidents where the person causing the accident
goes on the offensive and I just shake my head.

Glad to hear that you are OK! Hopefully things will turn for the better.

 

[WVBaker]

Sometimes all we can give is kindness.

"Always show more kindness than seems necessary, because the person receiving it needs it more than you will ever know."
Colin Powell

 

[needvaca]

Yes, kindness is great and a healer.
Remorse and saying your sorry (like the woman who caused the accident) is equally important and goes a long, long way towards fostering sympathy and understanding.
However, it seems like saying you're sorry is a lost art these days, like it is a sign of weakness (especially among those most powerful). We all make mistakes and need to acknowledge them, in order to come together.

 

[DaveNV]

Glad nobody was seriously hurt. Definitely seek medical attention, if only to document your pain for future reference. You never know in cases like this.

And yes, your response was excellent. As the saying goes, "Integrity is doing the right thing, even if nobody is watching."

Dave

 

[WinniWoman]

So sorry for your bad week. You can’t seem to catch a break!

A similar thing happened to my husband a month before he retired. Thankfully he and the driver who hit into him were fine and the car was not badly damaged. No harsh words were exchanged. The other drivers’ insurance company paid us.
Hope you can finally enjoy your well deserved vacation.

 

[bluehende]

Glad you are ok. However I will second the advice to be careful about an injury. I was in an accident like yours in my 20's and still have problems with my neck at times. It did not show up til the day after. This did happen in the days before the head rest so hopefully you will not experience any problems.

 

[Panina]

Thank you everyone for your support. Even though I was happy with myself for how I reacted I really needed to vent last night and it helped. I was so overwhelmed.

Today was better, my cousin was released from the hospital. Tests showed she had three strokes in the past that she did not know she had. This episode was either TIA or an extreme Migraine. She is real lucky. She is feeling good and on appropriate medications.

Moms blood pressure is still a bit high but 20 points lower then yesterday with the new medication, so going in the right direction.

Today I woke up with no pain so hope that continues. I went out walking in Key West, a chilly day and even saw a beautiful sunset in the windy chilly weather.

Spoke to the insurance adjusters and was told that our deductible should be paid by the persons insurance because she admitted fault, so more good news.

Will now go and end my day by going to a restaurant to have some comfort food, gluten free pizza. Tomorrow morning hope to venture to the farmers market.

 

[silentg]

Thank you everyone for your support. Even though I was happy with myself for how I reacted I really needed to vent last night and it helped. I was so overwhelmed.

Today was better, my cousin was released from the hospital. Tests showed she had three strokes in the past that she did not know she had. This episode was either TIA or an extreme Migraine. She is real lucky. She is feeling good and on appropriate medications.

Moms blood pressure is still a bit high but 20 points lower then yesterday with the new medication, so going in the right direction.

Today I woke up with no pain so hope that continues. I went out walking in Key West, a chilly day and even saw a beautiful sunset in the windy chilly weather.

Spoke to the insurance adjusters and was told that our deductible should be paid by the persons insurance because she admitted fault, so more good new.

Will now go and end my day by going to a restaurant to have some comfort food, gluten free pizza. Tomorrow morning hope to venture to the farmers market.

View attachment 16568

Beautiful photo

 

[pedro47]

Panin, I am praying that your week will be better.

 

[clifffaith]

Glad you are OK, Panina. Cliff had the entire back side of his car sheered off last Friday, and every day I check with him to see if he has any aches and pains. Best I can tell from going to the scene with him the next day, he probably could have been deemed partially at fault for making an unsafe left turn, but since the guy who hit him just kept on going, doesn't look like that will be the case. He turned left on red after being in a T intersection waiting to make a left turn into the plant nursery that made up the T. The traffic coming toward him was in two lanes, but the lane closest to the curb gets wide there and as cars would proceed through the intersection a third lane appears. I suspect someone pulled out of the right lane a few cars back and roared through the intersection on the red light while Cliff was turning left in front of the stopped traffic. He thought he'd hit a curb or a pot hole, did not even sound like a car accident to him and he never saw what hit him. A lady pulled into the nursery to see if he was OK and to tell him the other driver kept going. Another man stopped to get our bumper and other various parts out of the street and hand them to Cliff. Since Cliff is almost 82 and he had clearly been in front of someone to allow them to rip the back of the car apart, I suspect there is some sneaky code somewhere that will flag our insurance account -- that is if we don't see an increase next time because of this anyway. Car will be gone 3 weeks at the shop.

 

[geekette]

Good on you. She needed to hear that, to somehow release her from the guilt prison she was building for herself. This is why they are called accidents. It's only property damage. Still, yeah, I wouldn't want to be the one that caused it and I would feel awful that it was due to a pedal swap.

Not sure why you are surprised to find that you are a kind and compassionate person. The rest of your post proves it: you care about others. Don't be surprised the next time you go render kindness in a random situation you find yourself in. Embrace this part of yourself, as far too many people really don't care about others. Or kind of do, but, eh, Me First, I don't have time, it's not my problem...

 

[DrQ]

I'm sorry for your misfortune, but I think you got the better end of the incident. The guy in the middle got a double whammy when he got hit (whiplash) and then a forward collision when he hit you. You might find out there is a sacrificial internal part of the bumper which will have to be replaced along with the bumper cover.

Hopefully everyone is OK medically. Let insurance straighten it out.

I had a guy hit me on a double left turn a year and half ago. I was in a city where they would not send a car for a report unless one was not movable or there were injuries, so I couldn't get a police report. At the time it was "Oh it's my fault, don't call insurance, I'll pay for the repairs." Yeah sure.

When I filed my insurance claim, it was deny, deny deny. My insurance company just recovered from his and I got my deductible back.

I hope you feel better and I hope your loved ones are on the road to recovery.

 

[pedro47]

I am praying that this day will be the start of better things for all Tuggers.

Pray and Power will make things better.

 

[AnnaS]

You had it rough there for a while. Glad to hear you are okay and happy everything else is going well too.

When I was working people (mostly co-workers) used to always tell me, "you are always smiling, no matter what". Most of them were always miserable/hated their job, etc. etc. I used to reply, pointing to my lips, "the smile is free" and I feel the same way with kindness, it's free. I wish more people spread it around. Good for you!!!

Beautiful photo. Thank you for sharing.

 

[WinniWoman]

When you get rear ended you do not need to call your insurance company. You call the offenders’ insurance company and deal with them directly.

 

[Sugarcubesea]

So sorry you are dealing with this. I hope your ok.

 

[pedro47]

The Commander in Chief was rear ended in 2018. Her 1997 Acura TL was total with less than 120,000 miles on it. This was her baby. She has not driven 4,000 miles in 24 months. My advice do not deal with the person insurance company directly hired a good lawyer.

 

[Luanne]

When you get rear ended you do not need to call your insurance company. You call the offenders’ insurance company and deal with them directly.

I have always dealt with MY insurance company and let them duke it out with the other company.

 

[WinniWoman]

I have always dealt with MY insurance company and let them duke it out with the other company.

Not necessary in most cases. This just happened to my husband and it was easy peasy. Adjuster cane to look at our car and wrote us a check.

Happened to me once also. I never called my insurance company. No issues.