Stay At Home Humor

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Brilliant Halloween Costume idea.

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

This made me laugh.

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Mildred, the church gossip and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extracurricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused Frank, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told Frank (and several others) that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing.

Frank, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny....He said nothing.

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred's house.....walked home.....and left it there all night!!!

***********************

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

A woman tries getting on a bus but realizes that her skirt is too tight.

As the bus arrived & it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed & with a quick smile to the driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg.

She tried to take the step, only to discover that she couldn't. With another little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more, but was again unable to take the step. After becoming quite frustrated & embarrassed, she once again attempted to unzip her skirt even more, in order to allow more legroom to get on the first step of the bus.

About this time, a large Texan who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist & placed her gently on the step of the bus. She went ballistic & turned to the would-be Samaritan & yelled, "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!!!"

The Texan smiled & drawled, "Well ma'am, normally I'd agree with you. But after you unzipped my fly 3 times, I kinda figured we were friends."

*****************

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

If you know, you know.

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[pedro47]

Mildred, the church gossip and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extracurricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused Frank, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told Frank (and several others) that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing.

Frank, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny....He said nothing.

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred's house.....walked home.....and left it there all night!!!

***********************

Dave

Frank, is my kind of guy. A man of few words; but his mind is always thinking postive.

 

[DaveNV]

Some of you are old enough to understand why this is a perfect meme.

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Dave

 

[DaveNV]

Love this!

Dave

 

[Brett]

 

[Makai Guy]

 

[Makai Guy]

 

[Makai Guy]

 

[Makai Guy]

 

[TheHolleys87]

Mildred, the church gossip and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extracurricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused Frank, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told Frank (and several others) that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing.

Frank, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny....He said nothing.

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred's house.....walked home.....and left it there all night!!!

***********************

Dave

A woman tries getting on a bus but realizes that her skirt is too tight.

As the bus arrived & it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed & with a quick smile to the driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg.

She tried to take the step, only to discover that she couldn't. With another little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more, but was again unable to take the step. After becoming quite frustrated & embarrassed, she once again attempted to unzip her skirt even more, in order to allow more legroom to get on the first step of the bus.

About this time, a large Texan who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist & placed her gently on the step of the bus. She went ballistic & turned to the would-be Samaritan & yelled, "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!!!"

The Texan smiled & drawled, "Well ma'am, normally I'd agree with you. But after you unzipped my fly 3 times, I kinda figured we were friends."

*****************

Dave

I need some additional options on the Like menu. There’s giggle, then there’s LOL, and then there’s “laughing so hard that tears come to my eyes and I have DH read it and he laughs loudly too.”

You really found a treasure trove of funnies, didn’t you?