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Dave
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Stay At Home Humor
- Thread starter Ken555
- Start date
Dave
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Dave
- Joined
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- Location
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Dave
- Joined
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When a KISS fan is also a car buff.
Dave
Dave
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Dave
- Joined
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- Location
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Dave
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2006
- Messages
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- Location
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- Resorts Owned
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Dave
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2006
- Messages
- 22,503
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- Location
- Mesquite, Nevada
- Resorts Owned
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Dave
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2006
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- Location
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Dave
T_R_Oglodyte
TUG Lifetime Member
That's like the ads to call a psychic hotline. Shouldn't they be calling you?
Tank
TUG Member
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HICV South Beach Myrtle Beach
HICV Lake Geneva
HICV Gatlinburg
HICV Orange Lake Kissemee
Tank
TUG Member
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HICV South Beach Myrtle Beach
HICV Lake Geneva
HICV Gatlinburg
HICV Orange Lake Kissemee
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FROM THE “CARP FORUM” (CARP – California Association of Retired People)
Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find younger women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under Fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over-70 year-old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out.
Q: Why should 70-plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car
Q: Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it is the problem.
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.
Q: Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 70-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"
SMILE, You've still got your sense of humor, haven't you . . . uh . . . what’s you’re name again???
Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find younger women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under Fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over-70 year-old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out.
Q: Why should 70-plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car
Q: Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it is the problem.
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.
Q: Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 70-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"
SMILE, You've still got your sense of humor, haven't you . . . uh . . . what’s you’re name again???
- Joined
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Dave
billymach4
TUG Member
billymach4
TUG Member
Tank
TUG Member
- Joined
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- Location
- Northern Ohio
- Resorts Owned
-
HICV South Beach Myrtle Beach
HICV Lake Geneva
HICV Gatlinburg
HICV Orange Lake Kissemee
- Joined
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DaveLannyPC
TUG Member
Have you heard the new Elton John song about a woman named Jennifer who runs a sports gambling ring?
It's entitled Jenny and the Bets.
It's entitled Jenny and the Bets.
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- Sands of Kahana, Desert Springs I, DSV2, Shadow Ridge Enclaves Dlx
In the Keystone, S.D. area there was a miner who found a phenomenal gold claim. He named it after his wife. When he told her, she was very pleased. She later learned that he named the mine "Holy Terror". True story AFAIK.
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Dave
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2006
- Messages
- 22,503
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- Location
- Mesquite, Nevada
- Resorts Owned
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Dave
- Joined
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- Location
- Mesquite, Nevada
- Resorts Owned
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Dave
billymach4
TUG Member
I only have sons so maybe my answer isn't valid.
But I'd have a hard time not offering to show my electromagnets.