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Stay At Home Humor

plpgma

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Do they still make JiffyPop?
Yes they do -- but it's a smaller size now and doesn't taste as good as before (or, most likely, my tase buds have matured and I can now taste it the way it's always tasted!).
 

T_R_Oglodyte

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A woman and a man are lying in bed next to each other when her phone rings. She picks up, the man looks over at her and listens.

She is speaking in a cheery voice, "Hi, I'm so glad you called. Really? That's wonderful. I'm so happy for you. That sounds terrific.
Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye bye."

She hangs up, and the man asks, "Who was that?"

"Oh, she replies, "that was my husband telling me about the great time he's having on his golf trip with you."
 

T_R_Oglodyte

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I met a fairy who said she would grant me one wish. Immediately I said, "I want to live forever."

"Sorry," said the fairy, "I'm not allowed to grant eternal life."

"OK," I said, "Then, I want to see world peace and harmony before I die".

"You crafty bastard," said the fairy.
 

LannyPC

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Don't worry -- that IS normal -- it only gets questionable when they start talking back to you!
That reminds me of a joke I heard back in high school French class. It was told to us in French and we had to try to figure out what was said. It went like this:

A farmer was driving his horse-drawn carriage with his dog beside him. The horse was kind of sluggish so the farmer started whipping it almost mercilessly to go faster. The horse starts screaming, "Stop whipping me like that. It hurts!"

The farmer was flabbergasted and said, "Wow! I didn't know horses could talk!"

The dog said, "Yeah, neither did I."
 

mentalbreak

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When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car
I think this was originally a “deep thoughts by Jack Handy” on SNL. I’ve always enjoyed those.

My preteen son found this on a bumper sticker in a Hollywood souvenir shop and was in his way to show it to Grandpa (my dad). Luckily I ran into my son first and stopped him. It was 4 months after my dad’s best friend had a massive stroke and passed away in the passenger seat while my dad was driving. My son absolutely didn’t make the connection, and as I explained his eyes got huge and he felt so bad. Thank God we dodged that bullet.
 

Ken555

Tug Review Crew: Rookie
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Yes. We have an upper end store in our neighborhood that sells it. I think that it is kind of a unique store. The mainstream stores don't seem to stock it.
Not sure why this is in the humor thread, but you can buy this on Amazon.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
 

moonstone

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For us it was the Vicks Vapo-rub. True, I didn't like it as a kid -- but I must admit some nostalgia to remembering how it smelled (I think it smelled a bit better than BenGay).
When I worked in a long term care facility we kept a jar of Vicks Vapo-rub at the nursing station. If one of the residents had an accident (either end) we put some Vicks in our nostrils before putting a mask on to go clean them up. I don't know if I could go back to using it for a cold!


~Diane
 
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