How Can it Be I Still Have So Many “Things” I Don’t Want. Anyone Else?

[isisdave]

Not only that, I bought an unused -- that is, not new but never played -- baritone saxophone that my granddaughter does not know about, with the idea in mind of presenting it as a high school graduation gift in a year or so. (For now it's hidden where she's not apt to discover it.) I'm not sure how that idea will play out, but I am sure that 1 way or another the baritone saxophone will end up in her hands.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA​

When the granddaughter gets the sax, we want pictures!

 

[Panina]

When we moved last year, we listed many things for free on Facebook. Things were moving like crazy. The few things that did not go, I listed for $20 on Facebook Marketplace, and they sold quickly. Funny they did not go for free, but sold. My son in law said that there are people who won't go on the free sites, but will look on the for sale sights.

We purged prior to moving to a 55+ complex where the lawn and snow maintenance is taken care of, but we still have 1/4 basement full of bins with stuff. Family photos are hard to get rid of, and we have a big suitcase full of them. I think we will leave them for the kids to go through and throw out, because we can't seem to do it.

The other day I went thru a big bin of photos and kept only two photo books. My other half has 3 large boxes of photos to go thru. We also purged when moving but still have a garage full of bins with stuff as well as things in our home. Everyday I try to make bags of things to give away. Each week we donate them.

 

[Kat05]

This is such a great conversation and motivation! We've started another round of "organize and purge". Like many of you I have several totes from my mother's house that I must go through. Does anyone have suggestions for all the family pictures? I'm wondering about possibly scanning them and creating books for each sibling through Shutterfly or something similar. I wouldn't include every picture but those of our grandparents, older relatives, parents and each other growing up. Then I'd divide up the actual photos among siblings. Has anyone done this?

 

[stmartinfan]

I'm wondering about possibly scanning them and creating books for each sibling through Shutterfly or something similar. I wouldn't include every picture but those of our grandparents, older relatives, parents and each other growing up. Then I'd divide up the actual photos among siblings. Has anyone done this?

What a great idea! It would be really helpful if you identified all the people and their relationships. While your siblings likely will know everyone, their children may not, so it would be nice to include that info so that a future generation would know who the people are. Too many of my mother in laws photos had no labels so we were clueless about the identities of some.

 

[Kat05]

What a great idea! It would be really helpful if you identified all the people and their relationships. While your siblings likely will know everyone, their children may not, so it would be nice to include that info so that a future generation would know who the people are. Too many of my mother in laws photos had no labels so we were clueless about the identities of some.

I believe you can do that with the Shutterfly books add names dates, location comments etc

 

[Panina]

This is such a great conversation and motivation! We've started another round of "organize and purge". Like many of you I have several totes from my mother's house that I must go through. Does anyone have suggestions for all the family pictures? I'm wondering about possibly scanning them and creating books for each sibling through Shutterfly or something similar. I wouldn't include every picture but those of our grandparents, older relatives, parents and each other growing up. Then I'd divide up the actual photos among siblings. Has anyone done this?

My other half recently sent the actual pictures to relatives, his aunt and uncle, his sisters and cousins. Everyone's reaction was positive.

 

[AnnaS]

Over the last few years, have slowly donated many items (totes/boxes, bags) to VVA from my mom's and MIL's home. I kept so much in the attic and shed. Had planned on having a yard sale someday but that never happened/could not bother with it. Kept some sentimental items and some items could not part with.

So much has accumulated in my own home. A ton of saved "favors" from all the parties attended. So happy no one really gives out favors anymore. Donated all. Recently cleaned out attic when I had a new roof put in last year. Since my husband passed last year, I knew I would not be going up there as often. I did not want to bring up everything my sons took down.

I do save a lot "just in case it's needed", "it's pretty", "it's worth a few dollars", etc. etc. I need to clean up more not because I don't want to leave this chore to my kids but just in case I do downsize to a condo some day.

It feels so good when I clear things out and make room. Now I have another project, dilemma - I have not removed any of my husbands clothes, shoes, etc. Not sure when the moment will come for me and hopefully I won't fill those draws and closets.

Another issue I have that adds up is paperwork and boy have I cleaned up some. I know everything is paperless these days but I have just about everything mailed to me and save, save in files "just in case".

 

[Panina]

Over the last few years, have slowly donated many items (totes/boxes, bags) to VVA from my mom's and MIL's home. I kept so much in the attic and shed. Had planned on having a yard sale someday but that never happened/could not bother with it. Kept some sentimental items and some items could not part with.

So much has accumulated in my own home. A ton of saved "favors" from all the parties attended. So happy no one really gives out favors anymore. Donated all. Recently cleaned out attic when I had a new roof put in last year. Since my husband passed last year, I knew I would not be going up there as often. I did not want to bring up everything my sons took down.

I do save a lot "just in case it's needed", "it's pretty", "it's worth a few dollars", etc. etc. I need to clean up more not because I don't want to leave this chore to my kids but just in case I do downsize to a condo some day.

It feels so good when I clear things out and make room. Now I have another project, dilemma - I have not removed any of my husbands clothes, shoes, etc. Not sure when the moment will come for me and hopefully I won't fill those draws and closets.

Another issue I have that adds up is paperwork and boy have I cleaned up some. I know everything is paperless these days but I have just about everything mailed to me and save, save in files "just in case".

It is so hard giving away things of our loved one. I remember the day I had to pack up my deceased husband’s clothing. I had a friend help. Not sure I would have done it at that time without her help. I still have items that we purchased during our travels. Even though I don’t like some of them I am still hesitant giving them away. Kind of feel disloyal to his memory if I do.

 

[rapmarks]

I have notes on a lot of things such as:
These framed prints were signed by the photographer who spoke to Dads class.
These mixing bowls were my grandmothers
This belonged to my grandfather
This box has paperwork for genealogy
Ask aunt xxx if she wants this before you toss.
This box of milk glass belonged to great grandmother xxx.

I also have notes, go though this drawer carefully, there are gift cards, etc here.
I typed a list, pointing out things of particular value or sentiment. This was reproductive, because they actually took the grandfather clock made by my husband’s grandmother One less thing to clutter my house.
I know that there will be a dumpster in the driveway and things will be dumped. I would like the kids to stop and look before some things go heave ho.


My husband had over a hundred plaques and about 20 very expensive golf statues. I went to a tech club meeting and they were giving out awards. I told the sponsor about the plaques and he wants the ones I haven’t tossed yet and will reuse the base. The reason they weren’t all in the garbage is my daughter wanted me to save some.

I still have a lot of things I won’t toss, mostly for sentimental reasons. But if they are boxed together and labeled, it is an easy decision for others to make

Like others, I am not ready to discard everything, but I have it organized so that it won’t be as difficult and time consuming.

 

[jp10558]

This is such a great conversation and motivation! We've started another round of "organize and purge". Like many of you I have several totes from my mother's house that I must go through. Does anyone have suggestions for all the family pictures? I'm wondering about possibly scanning them and creating books for each sibling through Shutterfly or something similar. I wouldn't include every picture but those of our grandparents, older relatives, parents and each other growing up. Then I'd divide up the actual photos among siblings. Has anyone done this?

As a photo print quality snob, I tend to recommend Printique. But I will say scanning and making photo books (heck, just wrangling digital images!) is kind of a task. Especially if it's older photos, do you just want a scan and print? Often you'll want to do some correction, fixing too - dust, sharpness, whatever. Also size of print and type of photo book? I usually end up for myself preferring getting cheaper prints and putting them in cheap Amazon albums, as the photo books tend to be a lot more expensive for a given size or number of pages. Then there's the question of intended use - as a simple "here's a gift" that they can then add to their pile of "IDK why I have this on a shelf" the 3x5 ish smallest books are great. For actually looking at the photos with other people, I tend to prefer up to 11x17 which isn't even an option with many premade books. Then it depends on the scan quality and detail of source images what size is even worth doing.

Lots of questions, lots of work, lots of money, and probably the end result is increasing the "junk I don't know why I have" in the world...

 

[jp10558]

Another issue I have that adds up is paperwork and boy have I cleaned up some. I know everything is paperless these days but I have just about everything mailed to me and save, save in files "just in case".

Please please consider dealing with that. A family friend has rooms full of every mail item her mom ever got since I think 1970 till she passed in 2023. It's impossible to even begin to sort for "important". I honestly think it all should just go in the garbage really. Of course, who knows what stocks or bonds or whatever might be "forever hidden" in there? Don't leave that for your family - at least have a good sorting system if nothing else.

 

[WinniWoman]

Our local Goodwill just does not appreciate our donations. I feel like the employees there are overwhelmed with the line of cars dumping stuff.

Salvation Army takes stuff.

 

[Kat05]

As a photo print quality snob, I tend to recommend Printique. But I will say scanning and making photo books (heck, just wrangling digital images!) is kind of a task. Especially if it's older photos, do you just want a scan and print? Often you'll want to do some correction, fixing too - dust, sharpness, whatever. Also size of print and type of photo book? I usually end up for myself preferring getting cheaper prints and putting them in cheap Amazon albums, as the photo books tend to be a lot more expensive for a given size or number of pages. Then there's the question of intended use - as a simple "here's a gift" that they can then add to their pile of "IDK why I have this on a shelf" the 3x5 ish smallest books are great. For actually looking at the photos with other people, I tend to prefer up to 11x17 which isn't even an option with many premade books. Then it depends on the scan quality and detail of source images what size is even worth doing.

Lots of questions, lots of work, lots of money, and probably the end result is increasing the "junk I don't know why I have" in the world...

I'm probably way over thinking this and incorporating things that are important and interesting to me! I'll check out Printique I see they offer bound albums.

 

[Janann]

I have notes on a lot of things such as:
These framed prints were signed by the photographer who spoke to Dads class.

One time my husband accidentally got rid of a book that he had gotten signed by his favorite author. I now have large post-it tags hanging out of the tops of the handful of signed books that we have.

 

[Rolltydr]

One time my husband accidentally got rid of a book that he had gotten signed by his favorite author. I now have large post-it tags hanging out of the tops of the handful of signed books that we have.

I had several autographed books that I thought were valuable. When we prepared to move, I found that they weren’t valuable at all. I ended up donating them to a second hand book store.

 

[clifffaith]

One time my husband accidentally got rid of a book that he had gotten signed by his favorite author. I now have large post-it tags hanging out of the tops of the handful of signed books that we have.

I have a couple baskets and jars that we bought in Santa Fe that have notes in them with the price we paid in case after we are gone someone wants to try to sell them. That someone will be a paid fiduciary, so I hope to have replaced the “this is something, not nothing” notes with the names of friends here at the old folks home.

 

[clifffaith]

I had several autographed books that I thought were valuable. When we prepared to move, I found that they weren’t valuable at all. I ended up donating them to a second hand book store.

In the late 70s a friend stood in line at Famous Amos in Hollywood when Andy Warhol was signing books, complete with drawings of chocolate chip cookies. When I started selling on eBay at Christmas 2011 it was one of the first things I sold. Got $500. Same friend tried to sell her book to the Pawn Stars guys the year before and was told that because of the “To Susan” personalization it wasn’t a good buy for them. But someone in NYC didn’t mind “To Faith”.

 

[dioxide45]

I had several autographed books that I thought were valuable. When we prepared to move, I found that they weren’t valuable at all. I ended up donating them to a second hand book store.

With the amount of book signings that go on these days from many authors, the books really don't have any more value than just the value of the book itself. Which for used books is nearly $0. I see sometimes that an author will sneak into a Target or other store and autograph some of their books like they are doing a huge favor (and helping feed their ego). If the store finds them, they all have to be trashed.

 

[rapmarks]

One time my husband accidentally got rid of a book that he had gotten signed by his favorite author. I now have large post-it tags hanging out of the tops of the handful of signed books that we have.

Unfortunately, I have done that too.

 

[Janann]

I had several autographed books that I thought were valuable. When we prepared to move, I found that they weren’t valuable at all. I ended up donating them to a second hand book store.

I know that my books probably don't have a lot of dollar value, but they have some personal value.

 

[mchct]

While I am a minimalist for most things, Hallmark Christmas ornaments are my downfall. I inventoried them last year and have very close to 1900, I have 14 non-Hallmark ornaments that people have given me. I started working for Hallmark in 1973 when they made their first ornaments and began collecting them. My oldest continuing series is 45 years old and I have all 45. Over the years, they got cuter and there are series that I keep up. I already have an order in for 35 for this year! I do still get the employee discount.

I have three 9-foot trees, two 7-foot trees, 6 tabletop trees and a light and motion electronic set that sits on a buffet table. I put old fashioned Santa's on top of my kitchen cabinets and some of the small trees are on tables or bathroom vanities and one is in the laundry room. I have a large house, so everything fits nicely, but by New Years I am ready to see wide open spaces again.

I pack all the ornaments for each tree in bubble wrap and large Ziploc bags and put each tree's ornaments in a labeled plastic tub. These are stacked in a walk-in closet off my office and the trees go back in their boxes in the same closet. My grandson and his fiancee actually want them! (Which is handy because he inherits the house!)

Other than Christmas, I get rid of clothing that I do not wear, also various kitchen items that have not been used in the past year. My guest bedroom closets only have extra blankets and hangers and the dresser and chests are empty. We cleaned out the garage about 3 months after my husband died in 2023. We gave lots of tools to Habitat for Humanity. My grandson also took some so that he did not have to borrow his Dad's. I am the "keeper" of the 5x8 covered trailer that friends and family borrow from time to time. That will be claimed by my grandson too!

Ugh, I can somewhat relate to you since your worked for Hallmark and bought and collected their ornaments. I worked for Mattel Toys back in 1990 and unfortunately got into the bad habit of stopping at the employee store quite often and buying too many of the collector Barbie dolls since they gave an employee discount. All brand new and "NRFB" or never removed from box condition to help preserve their value when I would sell them in the future. But unfortunately Mattel got too greedy and overproduced and kept upping their number of "limited" editions almost every year. That ticked off the collectors and the market for the newer Barbie dolls fell. But the old, original ones are still pretty collectible. I probably have about 100 dolls in boxes and totes, just collecting dust and taking up space in the house!

Fortunately (maybe unfortunately though...) we do have a large house so have been able to keep them and not pay for outside storage unit. But the need to declutter that and all the paper and everything is now overwhelming.

And as someone mentioned in this thread, it's easy to say that you're going to sell the stuff, but it's very hard to get around and actually doing that! So maybe this is the year that I really get motivated and just list them on ebay or craigs list and end up taking a financial loss, but mental win to clear the clutter!

 

[mchct]

In addition to the heaps & mounds & piles & stacks of stuff stowed & stored in people's basements, attics, garages, garden sheds, crawl spaces, dens, spare rooms, lofts, closets, and back porches, there's as much or more out of sight & out of mind (for a monthly charge) in all those self-store, extra-space, mini-storage locker farms that sprouted up all over the country -- not just in cities & suburbs, but way out in the country also.

Do other countries have those, or are they a unique American phenomenon ?

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

I was surprised, but in Japan it seems that storage units (they call them "trunk room") are getting more common. I also thought they didn't have storage units in Japan but on the last trips the past couple of years, have noticed them when we're on the train or bus.

My husband and I also don't believe in paying for those off site storage units - out of sight = out of mind and you'll continue to pay the storage fees, which is what the storage companies are counting on! We are fortunate because we have a large house. But maybe not really fortunate because it has gotten us into the very bad habit of "hoarding" stuff and now our house is too cluttered and we need to take care of that, as it does cause a lot of mental stress! Most of my junk (I mean stuff) looks "neat" because most of it is boxed and stacked in the extra unused rooms, but I know that probably 90% of it can be tossed or donated.

However we also have a bunch of his late mother's stuff that we brought over to go through to then take care of. Unfortunately his mom was a "pack rat" and kept everything! Even newspapers back to the 1970's, shopping bags from Buffums, Robinsons, Bullocks, May Co, The Broadway, etc., strings, (if you're old enough, you'll know these long gone department stores!) and we used to joke with her that it could be a feature on that Hoarder's TV show! I think her mentality came because she was a teen in Tokyo during the war and everything back then was terrible with material and food shortages, so they learned to save everything! And she had the very bad habit of putting money or important papers or mail down and it would eventually get covered by those newspapers or magazines. So after she passed, we couldn't just chuck out a stack of newspapers, magazines, books, or dress patterns because she sometimes would put money in them!

Back to Japan - in Japan the storage units are pricey if closer to major cities. My husband and his two brothers equally inherited a small house on the outskirts of Tokyo when their aunt passed away about 10 years ago. The older brother had moved to Japan several years before that to live/work there. He then moved into the house (with the other brother's ok) and then also moved in his friend, which was somewhat mentioned by the older brother but was really never officially "ok'd" by the other brothers.

And the past several years, the older brother has moved more of his stuff into the house and taken over all the rooms; so we find it too uncomfortable and crowded and no longer stay at the house. The younger brother and his family will stay at the house when they're travelling to Japan but I think they're also getting a bit uncomfortable. We used to keep some of our extra stuff (clothes, towels, pillows/bedding, tools) in a small closet/armoire and in some boxes at the house. Anyways his older brother decided to rent a storage unit in Tokyo to move more of his stuff, although the house is still packed.

So when we came to Japan that time we stopped by the house to pick up and remove our stuff from the house since we decided that we were no longer going to stay there, even though it's a 1/3 split. We went into the room and asked where our stuff was since we didn't' see it. He said he had rented the storage space a "trunk room" and moved our stuff there too! We told him that we don't "do" storage units and he got the message that we weren't paying for any part of his storage unit and he went and retrieved our stuff. I guess the younger brother is also tired of this unequal arrangement and now they're going to sell the property and do a three way split and everyone goes their own way! Much better, not good to be in business with some family members!

 

[geekette]

Salvation Army takes stuff.

In some locations, SA will come pick up.

 

[rapmarks]

In some locations, SA will come pick up.

Very difficult to find anyone to come pick up in area of Wisconsin where I live. And the waste disposal will not take anything that doesn’t fit inside garbage can,with a limit of two cans.

 

[clifffaith]

I let Goodwill pick up once, then never again. Since I sold on eBay, I know how to pack breakables to mail them. No way I was going to that effort to have Goidwill pick up several boxes of items that didn’t sell at a garage sale. But everything was either padded/wrapped in newspaper or fabric items that were also being donated. Watched the picker uppers just throw the boxes on to a truck that already had visibly caving in boxes on the bottom layer. So hand carry to donation center after that, after first leaving stuff at the curb for a day with a “Free” sign to lessen my burden.