How Can it Be I Still Have So Many “Things” I Don’t Want. Anyone Else?

[WinniWoman]

I am one of those OCD, super organized types and even so over my lifetime I have had lots of stuff to sort through and eventually dispose of. One thing I learned is organizing things is nice, but to truly simplify your life you have to actually get rid of those things.

In our former home as we remodeled for the last time in 32 years one room at a time over 7 years, I did a purge, but even so when it came time for us to downsize and move 6 years ago it was amazing how much we had to get rid of. Of course, as neat and organized as it was it was still a kind of a big house so it was deceiving how much stuff we owned. The more room you have the more you fill that room with.

For me my books were the hardest to part with. And I do still have quite a lot, but no where near what I used to. I also had a lot of those little Cat's Meow wooden house villages on shelves above all our downstairs windows.

But the worst was my husband, who is definitely a hoarder. So many fights we had and still do!

The best thing we did was move into this little cottage where we can only have so much stuff. Hardly any closets and the ones we have are small. The garage is small so just basics in there plus my car, but we do have a huge unfinished basement which keeps my husband kind of happy, but he's still hoards and he did sneak some stuff up here when we moved. I mean-the grass trimmer and leaf blower have been collecting dust all these years since the HOA handles that stuff. By now he should have given them away and I do intend on doing a basement sweep sometime this summer/fall. Enough is enough! He's still insists on keeping his wool hunting jackets even though he no longer hunts and he never wears them- ever! So they are in one of those portable clothes tarp thingys in the basement along with who knows what else!

Each March I do indoor spring cleaning since we are stuck inside so that helps. I go through the closets and drawers.

Also it helps that I don't like to shop so no risk of buying anything that is unnecessary and will take up space.

I don't even care about pictures except those of my son which older ones are in a box, on the Amazon Prime Cloud and some on a hard drive or my computer. Even so- I only have a digital frame with some photos I uploaded and have failed to keep updated. So no photos all over the place- no. Not my style.

I think I have done a real good job with simplifying. But always room for improvement!

PS When my parents died I only took my dad's guitar pick and my mom's Betty Boop key chain to remind me of them which I keep in my desk drawer. Plus a couple of Pyrex bowls I actually use daily. That's it.

 

[WinniWoman]

I read somewhere that getting rid of something that you used to use is admitting that you'll never do it again. I'll admit I have had a family sewing machine forever, and I used to sew some clothes for myself. However, the machine hasn't been used in many, many years. If I get rid of it, I'm admitting that I'm never going to sew again. (Yes, I know I could buy another sewing machine, but the principle of the theory still stands. )

I'm sure there are lots of people with art supplies, cooking tools, sports equipment, etc. that they can't part with because they just don't want to admit that they have either lost interest in something, or they are physically unable to do it any more.

This is so true. Two things I have procrastinated on getting rid of is my bread machine and my snowshoes. I rarely have baked any bread and in fact, didn't bake any at all this past year, and ended up throwing out the expired yeast and flour.

And I thought after my spine surgery I'd be outside snowshoeing again and due to side effects from the surgery it never happened.

Something else we have't used is our ice crusher. Hubby refuses to throw it out because he keeps saying he wants to make Pina Coladas with it. Never have since we moved.Why I don't know because we always used to make them when we lived in NY. Now we just drink pre made Margaritas once in a while.

 

[WaikikiFirst]

I read somewhere that getting rid of something that you used to use is admitting that you'll never do it again.

or never really did in the first place. Man, the lack of logic in that is so clear.
a) Just because someone HAS something doesn't mean it is important to them.
b) "admitting" you will never do it again is a very MATURE act when the person IMPULSIVELY bought something they didn't really have much interest in and never really developed much interest in (as SO many people do)
Somehow being IMPULSIVE is supposed to overrule the ability to be MATURE?

 

[WaikikiFirst]

I had to read the title twice and focus on if it meant what it seemed to say. THen realized
a) Join the club. Our entire society is wired to make you do that. Even if you really don't have much disposable income, there's credit for that.
b) LOL, remembering when I visited the home of a college friend shortly after graduating. The house was packed with all kinds of crap. After being introduced to the mom, we were sitting around. The mom said she was goign out shopping. My friend said "My mom, the modern-day hunter-gatherer." Hilarious. True.
One of my rules to live by = "I'm not a Material Girl", which I have said more than a few times when discussing the lack of or need to obtain crap physical items with other people.

 

[WaikikiFirst]

ave a friend who said he wants his house to be like a timeshare: sparsely furnished, not a lot of junk, empty end tables, few clothes in the closet and drawers, etc. Not a bad idea.

If I were single, LOL. THen I'd have to frequently tell people who came to my home and asked where everything is "I'm not a Material Girl." I'd probably end up learning all the lyrics and sing it.

 

[rickandcindy23]

Is there any easy way to transfer photos to a hard drive or USB? Any at all? Scanning would be very time consuming.

 

[jp10558]

Is there any easy way to transfer photos to a hard drive or USB? Any at all? Scanning would be very time consuming.

If you don't care about quality, you can just take a picture of the picture with a digital camera or cellphone. Otherwise, scanning is the way - you can pay a company a bunch to do it for you if you want.

 

[Passepartout]

Is there any easy way to transfer photos to a hard drive or USB? Any at all? Scanning would be very time consuming.

Look for a 'photo stick' Amazon has 'em for under $20. Plug n' Play. They are supposed to eliminate duplicates and load all your photos on a thumb drive. Check to see if it's fully searchable before you delete your originals.

 

[Talent312]

I used to joke that we should rent a moving van, load only what we needed and dispose of the rest. Then we'd drive the van around the block and move back into our now empty house,

My DW is convinced the kids will want our "heirlooms."
I suspect that they'll have an estate sale, instead.

 

[isisdave]

Is there any easy way to transfer photos to a hard drive or USB? Any at all? Scanning would be very time consuming.

If you mean physical, printed-on-paper ones: no, not really. You can either send them to a service or borrow a scanner (maybe you have an all-in-one printer?) and do it while watching TV. You could hire a grandchild, or a random high school student to do it.

 

[Talent312]

If you mean physical, printed-on-paper ones: no, not really. You can either send them to a service or borrow a scanner (maybe you have an all-in-one printer?) and do it while watching TV. You could hire a grandchild, or a random high school student to do it.

I bought a dedicated photo scanner for Christmas 2024.
I warned the kids they were going to get their baby photos.
The scanner is still in the box.

 

[Ralph Sir Edward]

So many things to say about de-cluttering. . . .

I have been "dematerializing" things for several decades. (Of course, I am a "techie".) All my music is dematerialized, with backups both on-site and in a safe deposit box. 95% of my books are now e-books, with the same sort of backups. I currently run 3 computers, all nano sized computers - a "clean" machine (no Internet connection), a "dirty" machine (Internet connected), and a windows 7 box for scanning. (I scan all my incoming personal papers, and file them in a tax paper/per year set, I have everything back to 2011, and all asset purchases back to 1980. I keep the paper for 3 years and then shred it.) I run Linux on the other two machines, and have virtual machines of both windows XP and Windows 7 on the clean box (and an Atari 800 emulator for my old Atari games). I can run virtually all the software I have ever purchased on one other machine. . .

I became the "owner of last resort" for many relatives, from 90 year old quilts to a silk "meatball" and Samari sword gained hors de combat by one of my uncles in the Philippines early in 1945.

Sometimes it is hard to de-clutter. . .

(Then there is the optical rails I bought for a physics experiment. Anyone want a $2500 optical rail set (with JD Uniphase laser?)

 

[Rolltydr]

My DW is convinced the kids will want our "heirlooms."
I suspect that they'll have an estate sale, instead.

Which in itself is a pita! I really don't look forward to having to go through all the stuff if she passes before I do. To me, that is just added stress in what will be a particularly stressful time. I've read several organizational gurus say something on the order of, "Please don't leave your stuff for your spouse or kids. They don't want it, and they don't want to have to deal with it." I know that's not true of everyone, but it certainly is how I feel.

 

[AwayWeGo]

My DW is convinced the kids will want our "heirlooms."
I suspect that they'll have an estate sale, instead.

A few years ago we attended a sr. citz. downsizing seminar at the community center.

The 1st thing the person running the seminar said was, "Your kids don't want your stuff."

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[Passepartout]

The 1st thing the person running the seminar said was, "Your kids don't want your stuff."

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

Believe your kids when they tell you this. Doesn't matter. 'She who shall not be disagreed with' gets comfort from her possessions. Who am I to take that from her?

 

[easyrider]

Is there any easy way to transfer photos to a hard drive or USB? Any at all? Scanning would be very time consuming.

I scanned and placed our photos and videos on a few external hard drives. All of them are backed up on external hard drives and the cloud. Yes, it was time consuming but looking at all those photos and videos was fun. I still haven't digitized the old VHS and 8mm tapes but I've been planning on having this done for a long time.

Bill

 

[easyrider]

A few years ago we attended a sr. citz. downsizing seminar at the community center.

The 1st thing the person running the seminar said was, "Your kids don't want your stuff."

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

That's probably true for many of our things. I'm not sure I even want some of this stuff but I have it.

Bill

 

[Brett]

A few years ago we attended a sr. citz. downsizing seminar at the community center.

The 1st thing the person running the seminar said was, "Your kids don't want your stuff."

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

That's probably true for many of our things. I'm not sure I even want some of this stuff but I have it.

Bill

Yep. Kids don't want your stuff, you don't want (or need) your stuff ... whaddya are gonna do?

Timeshare Von will be horrified but I recently dropped off an old bowling ball with bag and shoes at Goodwill - might fit someone

 

[Rolltydr]

Small victory! I have permission to donate a couple of litter boxes we aren’t using to a local cat shelter! I will get that done today!

 

[4TimeAway]

And we still have my mom's and my grandmother's china, hoping a child or nibling will come to their senses and clutter their house with it. Otherwise, I suppose it'll be the dumpster in the driveway, but they owe us that much.

SO... We have like 4 sets of china now and will probably get gifted 2-4 more sets. Trying to pawn a set off on our son for his college apartment use. Don't really care which set. They are moving into a 1940's-sh 2 story 1 bedroom place without a dishwasher. Seems perfect to me.

 

[jp10558]

Which in itself is a pita! I really don't look forward to having to go through all the stuff if she passes before I do. To me, that is just added stress in what will be a particularly stressful time. I've read several organizational gurus say something on the order of, "Please don't leave your stuff for your spouse or kids. They don't want it, and they don't want to have to deal with it." I know that's not true of everyone, but it certainly is how I feel.

I think you tend to know if someone might be interested in something you have. The stuff people have wanted in our family:

• My mom wanted my grandmothers house and got it.
• My mom was happy to get my grandmothers crock pot and a cast iron pan.
• My sister was happy to get my uncle's 5 year old truck.
• My BIL was happy to get my uncle's lawn mower and random hand tools.
• My BIL was happy to get some of my uncle's hunting rifles, as was my cousin. Not that they ever use them, and eventually someone else will have to clear them out.
• My BIL was happy to get his dads tractors and 3 axle trailer and random tractor attachments.
• I was happy to "get back" a nice watch I had gotten my dad 4ish years before he passed.
• I'll hopefully be happy to get my mom's house.
• My sister was happy to get my grandmothers knitting needles.

Beyond that I think it was mostly junk. So the general take away is - people often tell you or show you what they might be interested in before you die - if they've shown no interest at all in your slide collection or room of memorabilia - you're probably just leaving them the need to rent a dumpster...

I'm convinced - from people I know, myself, and the posts above - that keeping stuff "to hand down" is all about making the person wanting to hand down the stuff feel better. It's some mental block. It's kinda unlikely your relatives will be interested in the same things to the same degree as you.

 

[Cornell]

I hate stuff. I hate clutter. Buying more storage containers isn't the solution. It's actually ADDING more crap to your home just to organize the crap you already have.

I'm not sentimental at all, so that helps me live the way I do.

My personal pet peeves: holiday decor that people put up that is 30 years old. Like everything, things go out of style. Upgrade and get rid of the old crap.

Any time I buy something new, it is to replace something I already have. So if I buy a new decorative item, something has to go away.

I belong to a Buy Nothing group and it is a great easy way to keep stuff from piling up.

 

[rickandcindy23]

I hate stuff. I hate clutter. Buying more storage containers isn't the solution. It's actually ADDING more crap to your home just to organize the crap you already have.

I'm not sentimental at all, so that helps me live the way I do.

My personal pet peeves: holiday decor that people put up that is 30 years old. Like everything, things go out of style. Upgrade and get rid of the old crap.

Any time I buy something new, it is to replace something I already have. So if I buy a new decorative item, something has to go away.

I belong to a Buy Nothing group and it is a great easy way to keep stuff from piling up.

You should see Rick's Christmas decor outside. So 80's. I love it. But he did get rid of the incandescent lights and got LED ones. The savings made it easy to throw those old light strings away.

 

[Cornell]

You should see Rick's Christmas decor outside. So 80's. I love it. But he did get rid of the incandescent lights and got LED ones. The savings made it easy to throw those old light strings away.

I got rid of my artificial tree this year after lugging it to various moves. Just decided "I'm done with this". Tired of the tree skirt - the whole deal. I have a screen porch so the last 2 years I've put up a real tree in my porch with only lights and I love it. Simple, clean. And it's not IN my house.

 

[Ralph Sir Edward]

Another shrinking thing. Those big stereo receivers? I replace one with a small digital receiver (S.M.S.L. SA300). sounds nice (to me) and is only 3" X 4" x 7".