About To Lose My Job

[WinniWoman]

The things that come up are limited only by the imagination.

One of the main things I remember is that when I started doing the documentation process with one employee, the individual began complaining that they were being singled out, that none of the co-workers were being scrutinized to the same level.
After the second go-round on that topic and being a good listener, I realized that what was going on, consciously or unconsciously, was that the employee was trying to avoid acknowledging or addressing the performance issues that I was documenting. When I stopped being empathetic and insisted we attend to the performance, then I suddenly became a mean, insensitive, horrible person who was just out to screw employees.

I might add that I started a documentation process with all employees as soon as a deficiency item was noted in a performance review. We would start by talking about the issue, and why I had reached that conclusion. In 80% or more of cases, the employee acknowledged that it was an issue and moved to developing a response program - no further documentation. In the rest of the cases, the employee would request more information so I would start more involved documentation, and schedule a mid-year update with the employee. That took care of all but a handful of cases; those were the situations that were difficult. And they usually were cases where no amount of documentation was adequate; the employee was simply unwilling or unable to recognize the issue, and instead expected that we would adjust the entire work environment to address their particular situation.

So he was certainly correct in his observation that co-workers were not having their work scrutinized to the same level. That wasn't a question of unfairness

In my years of working in a company, I heard occasional stories from employees about how a certain boss was delighting in making their life miserable by documenting work performance issues. But I have never met a manager, including those being talked about in those stories, who enjoyed performance documentation. It's terrible, terrible, terrible work. It's time-consuming. It takes you away from doing other important things. It's not fun. If documentation is done poorly, it's probably because it's such unpleasant work to do.

**************

A mentor one time gave me a wonderful piece of advice. He said to always be sure that the value I was creating in my job exceeded the salary I was being paid. If I did that well I would always be able to find a job. If my employer was so stupid as to fire me, then I should be glad for the opportunity to go to work for a business that is better run than the one I just left.

If you know how you have been creating value and can document it, you have the easiest job interview in the world. I worked with a guy one time what kept a tally of all of the money saving projects he implemented or was involved with. About July of every year he would schedule a meeting with his boss, where he would show him how in the first six months he had already saved the company more money than they were paying him in his annual salary.

If you don't know how to assess the value of what you are doing, then you need to find out how to do that. And if you can't do that, then you should consider that at any point in time, you are vulnerable to having someone start questioning why you are being paid to do what you are doing.

Excellent! All good points. But not applicable in my situation. I have not been written up for poor performance, etc. And- I am not looking for work, so I don't need to evaluate anything.

I was just in our other center. One of our really good techs- very well-liked- was there. Said she hates the place. They made her run over to this site after she was scheduled for the other- to do two different types of tests. Patients are waiting and not happy. They won't hire another tech- want her to do it all. Everything is a crisis. She can't wait to get the hell out either.

 

[Elan]

If you don't know how to assess the value of what you are doing, then you need to find out how to do that. And if you can't do that, then you should consider that at any point in time, you are vulnerable to having someone start questioning why you are being paid to do what you are doing.

That might be true at a smaller company. It's very difficult to do when working for a Fortune 200 level company that is multi-faceted. From R&D through production, testing, QA, marketing, sales, etc. And talk about a mindless, unproductive exercise...

 

[am1]

Glad I walked away from working for others after 2 weeks at my first job out of grad school.

 

[WinniWoman]

This is a two bit small company where a local hospital has about a 10% stake in it- down from a larger stake over the years- but probably not for long. Prior to this new company taking over- we were started and owned by a local group of radiologists in a joint venture with the hospital. The doctors now have sold it to this small "regional" company (they have 9 centers) that is only interested in acquiring more radiology centers. Probably wants to cash out some day and could care less about anything else.

 

[VacationForever]

That might be true at a smaller company. It's very difficult to do when working for a Fortune 200 level company that is multi-faceted. From R&D through production, testing, QA, marketing, sales, etc. And talk about a mindless, unproductive exercise...

Whenever friends asked me what I did at the Fortune XX company, I said all I did was answer emails, go to meetings, occasionally made a Powerpoint for presentation, met with staff and wrote reviews about my staff. Very unproductive.

 

[Elan]

Whenever friends asked me what I did at the Fortune XX company, I said all I did was answer emails, go to meetings, occasionally made a Powerpoint for a presentation, met with staff and wrote reviews about my staff. Very unproductive.

It's no so much that, but in my case I write and run code to find & fix issues pre-production. I definitely find things that, if they hit production, would potentially cost the company millions of dollars. But I can't say, unequivocally, that one of our other processes wouldn't have found the problem, at some point. Now, I could start tracking this stuff, and ultimately do a statistical analysis to try to justify my existence, but that would be extremely tedious, time-consuming and unproductive -- taking oodles of time away from my real job -- problem solving. Suffice it to say that management has enough faith in the work I do to deem it worthwhile. And, that's the way it should be.

 

[vacationhopeful]

Most bosses like to control people and have 'worshipping' flunkies. Everything going WRONG is someone else's fault or their task plan was NOT followed.

I worked for a new manager who ONLY hired Ivy League graduates .. either at the BS/BA level or graduate school. My brother was Princeton graduate and I graduated from a Southern finishing school. Guess I had some experiences with THAT attitude before hand. After his 6th NEW (Ivy) hire, I got greatly annoyed ... found his boss at his favorite watering hole (a bar), got a drink brought by the boss (to set the mood - causal) and clearly stated my position ... "If your BOY Jonathan hires ONE more IVY League Graduate, I AM GONNA SUE YOU ALL!". And downed my drink. The big boss said, "he is not doing that!". I then asked him to NAME just one (exempt) person he had hired, who was NOT from an Ivy League school. He had to THINK for a few long moments .. and they said. "Tyler". My instant reply was "When did Cornell drop out of the Ivy League?" Curse words followed, pickup his money and left the bar. The next work day, the big boss (U of PA graduate) walked by my cubical, knodded to me and entered my boss's walled office (Harvard), shut the door to discuss HIS new floor hiring plan (of no new hires). The floor boss again looked and knodded to me as he walked by my cubical again .. back to his office down the hallway.

I got a new internal company job about 6+ months later via applying without ANY support from anyone in my group or management chain. My floor boss was on that committee and was stunned when a different peer area manager ASKED to 'take' me from his group for a new section in this other group. This new project was critical for the company's direction ... with broad exposure. Bye, Bye .. Jonathan! But the manager who ran the new project .. he was not up to the job. And less than 2 years later, I went back fulltime for my MBA ... 90% tuition & books covered and 50% pay plus medical paid by my employer in full. After graduating with NO DEBT, I was earning TWICE as much from a BIGGER company as a contract consultant for 3.5 years (blue oval logo). With that contract job ending in late 1987 ..... been self employed for 31 years now.

I had invested in real estate when the market was DOWN during the years I did computer systems consulting work ... mainly to help my income tax situation. I had brought 3 houses while working for the first company (my little starter home, my vacation home and then a NEWER & bigger place to live). I traded the 3rd house to a neighbor for his OLD (and half the size of my "NEWER & bigger") and ugly home. I stored most of my possession in the free-standing garage, rented the 2bdr house to a tenant and moved 120 miles away to attend graduate school ... renting a apartment above a law office. My youngest sister and I graduated her university TOGETHER! My parents JUST BEAMED with pride during graduation ... other parents could be heard whispering ... THEY HAD TWO AT LEHIGH!!! It was expensive .. but I resisted screaming ... I PAID MY OWN WAY!

Neither my first company (intergrated oil company) nor the blue oval company EXIST ANYMORE (like on the NYSE or any other exchange board). As for myself ... still working. But can spend this morning getting my 93yo aunt settled into her hospital bed (fall at her apartment on Sunday), read TUG, eat lunch with a my contractor and deposit checks into the bank.

NOW >>>> What other trouble can I get into today? It is 1:14PM ... 1 hour and 48 minutes left in my contractor's workday. 10 minutes to get to his work site. Pick up ANY supply list he might need filled? Or go check on my 2 sister's wandering around from California and Maryland?

SISTER TIME WINS!!!!

 

[bogey21]

I worked for a new manager who ONLY hired Ivy League graduates .. either at the BS/BA level or graduate school.

I was in a similar situation when I was the Executive VP of my Bank. The President had a similar requirement;i.e. hire only those with Graduate Degrees. I wanted to hire a Credit Officer I knew from back when I worked in another city who had the street smarts and experience for the job. The only problem was he only had a HS Diploma and 3 years working in a steel mill in Granite City, IL before getting a chance at a small Bank in St Louis. The way I solved the problem was to wait until my boss, my Bank's President was on a one week out of town business trip. While he was gone I hired my guy. When my boss got back he never asked about my hire's credentials and I don't know if he ever found out what I did. Later he got fired and I was named President...

George

 

[easyrider]

For the most part of my life I had the best boss ever. That guy always knows what I'm thinking and about to do. More often than not, we are on the same page regarding many issues. Its been great working for him.

Did I mention I was self employed.

Bill

 

[Talent312]

For the most part of my life I had the best boss ever... Did I mention I was self employed.

I have a terrible boss, even though I'm retired.
She makes me help with meals, laundry, take out the garbage and mow the weeds...
usually when I'm doing something important like watching Property Brothers on HGTV.
.

 

[MOXJO7282]

Whenever friends asked me what I did at the Fortune XX company, I said all I did was answer emails, go to meetings, occasionally made a Powerpoint for presentation, met with staff and wrote reviews about my staff. Very unproductive.

I've worked for a Fortune 500 for 25 years, the last 13 with one and i can say there was a time when most depts were bloated with some workers who did very little but that is no longer the case with the advent of technology that can track your every move so now big corporations are very lean and extremely productive. This is so the big fat cats can make even more of course.

 

[WinniWoman]

I made it through this short week. He asked me into his office to briefly meet with him and the new clinical director who is butting into the marketing area - smh... Anyway- said he just wanted to go over a list of where I am at before the new woman starts. I had everything handled, of course. I had to ask him when the new person starts (though I already knew) and then he tells me that he is hiring a second marketing person! Why tell me that? Why would I care? I asked if that person was starting the same week as the other and he said he didn't know- depended on the budget. I suspect it is the guy who is a 1099 who already works for the company for some of the other sites they have. IF he is even telling the truth, which I doubt.

Then he tells me he lost the list of my contacts I sent to him back in the spring and if I still had it and could send it to him. I told him I did not. He looked annoyed and indicated he couldn't believe i didn't save it. I told him I had no reason to save it after I sent it to him- that I eventually delete things I don't need. I told him I would type him up a new list- that it was not a big deal. Told him what I do in my job in innate. I know them all off the top of my head.

Today I sent them to him and he said he appreciated it. Of course, I should have told him where to go and not sent the list. But I am trying to remain professional and I want to get my vacation pay and get that last week of work in when I get back from the vacation. The paychecks will stop after that, which is freaking me out.

Was his birthday today and supposedly an email went out to "some" employees to contribute to a cake- not me, of course- but also some others did not get the email either. At lunch, his "harem" was singing happy birthday to him as me and a few of my other colleagues looked on in silence. I wanted to vomit. LOL!

Neither he or the clinical director or any of his minions have not even mentioned my departure to me in terms of what my plans are or anything. Zippo. All are very cold towards me. They could care less. And neither has the ex-CEO of our company (that sold to this new company) whom I still see on occasion and worked for these past 13 years- shows what he is made of. I am sure he must know I am leaving. Unbelievable....

The techs are all complaining about getting numerous emails with threats of disciplinary action for this or that. The techs and nurses, who I am close with - many have been there a while like me- they keep asking what kind of wine I drink so I know they are planning amongst themselves something for when I leave.

I have been visiting all my clients/doctors offices and saying goodbye. I am telling them exactly what happened but also I am telling them our doctors and our technicians that are there are a good crew - that it is just management that has been an issue- but I wanted them to know what transpired- to hear it from me. Some cried. I cried. Lots of hugging. Many were so surprised to hear the news. It all feels surreal. Best part of my job was some of these wonderful people I have met along the way.

I still haven't wrapped my head around this whole thing. I always thought I would be ecstatic to quit work but because of the circumstances I don't feel that way. I can't seem to unwind from it.

I am off to the Cape in another day, so I am hoping to get my mind off of it, and then I have the one more week left at work. Will be interesting.

What a year it has been.

 

[VacationForever]

I made it through this short week. He asked me into his office to briefly meet with him and the new clinical director who is butting into the marketing area - smh... Anyway- said he just wanted to go over a list of where I am at before the new woman starts. I had everything handled, of course. I had to ask him when the new person starts (though I already knew) and then he tells me that he is hiring a second marketing person! Why tell me that? Why would I care? I asked if that person was starting the same week as the other and he said he didn't know- depended on the budget. I suspect it is the guy who is a 1099 who already works for the company for some of the other sites they have. IF he is even telling the truth, which I doubt.

Then he tells me he lost the list of my contacts I sent to him back in the spring and if I still had it and could send it to him. I told him I did not. He looked annoyed and indicated he couldn't believe i didn't save it. I told him I had no reason to save it after I sent it to him- that I eventually delete things I don't need. I told him I would type him up a new list- that it was not a big deal. Told him what I do in my job in innate. I know them all off the top of my head.

Today I sent them to him and he said he appreciated it. Of course, I should have told him where to go and not sent the list. But I am trying to remain professional and I want to get my vacation pay and get that last week of work in when I get back from the vacation. The paychecks will stop after that, which is freaking me out.

Was his birthday today and supposedly an email went out to "some" employees to contribute to a cake- not me, of course- but also some others did not get the email either. At lunch, his "harem" was singing happy birthday to him as me and a few of my other colleagues looked on in silence. I wanted to vomit. LOL!

Neither he or the clinical director or any of his minions have not even mentioned my departure to me in terms of what my plans are or anything. Zippo. All are very cold towards me. They could care less. And neither has the ex-CEO of our company (that sold to this new company) whom I still see on occasion and worked for these past 13 years- shows what he is made of. I am sure he must know I am leaving. Unbelievable....

The techs are all complaining about getting numerous emails with threats of disciplinary action for this or that. The techs and nurses, who I am close with - many have been there a while like me- they keep asking what kind of wine I drink so I know they are planning amongst themselves something for when I leave.

I have been visiting all my clients/doctors offices and saying goodbye. I am telling them exactly what happened but also I am telling them our doctors and our technicians that are there are a good crew - that it is just management that has been an issue- but I wanted them to know what transpired- to hear it from me. Some cried. I cried. Lots of hugging. Many were so surprised to hear the news. It all feels surreal. Best part of my job was some of these wonderful people I have met along the way.

I still haven't wrapped my head around this whole thing. I always thought I would be ecstatic to quit work but because of the circumstances I don't feel that way. I can't seem to unwind from it.

I am off to the Cape in another day, so I am hoping to get my mind off of it, and then I have the one more week left there. Will be interesting.

What a year it has been.

Hugs, MaryAnn. Enjoy your vacation. You know what they say, it will all be alright one way or another.

My late MIL and FIL used to tell stories and there is one that stands out... She said there were times they thought they were tight on their budget and had no idea how they were going to make ends meet for that month but they always turned out fine.

 

[DaveNV]

What a year it has been.

Mary Ann, I can't "Like" your post, because it is filled with such stress, anger, and disappointment. I fully understand how you feel. I suspect that you, like myself, try to find the good in people, and we're dumbfounded when certain people come along who seem to have no "good" in them. I'll never understand how those people sleep at night.

When this is all finished, and you've had time to decompress and gain a new perspective, I sincerely hope you can find some happiness in your day-to-day life. I know you've been trying to work things out, and to find the logic in all of this. I think sometimes some things just can't be figured out. They just "are." And sometimes, through no fault of our own, to be frank, life just sucks.

You are a good person, with a good heart. Try and remember that. Don't lose your sense of self and humor in the throes of this exhausting mess. It'll be over with very soon, and you'll be free to decide what is the right choice for YOU to make.

Wishing you only good things, going forward. Hang in there. You're almost done.

Dave

 

[WinniWoman]

Thanks Dave and everyone! I have so appreciated all your input and kind and supportive words!

I have never not worked and although I never liked working I am so used to having that income coming in. I am also now starting to feel old (doesn't help that everyone is automatically assuming I am retiring without me even mentioning that word) and even a bit lost and like I was tossed aside, which, of course, I was. Makes me feel like a nobody.

I am also getting anxious to redo our house budget and take care of business and so on so I can see where we will stand financially and get settled into my new norm. I am very OCD and a planner- not used to just winging things or being spontaneous. I am such a worrier it isn't even funny. But the important stuff will have to wait until after this vacation. Of course, now I am worried about spending money on vacation. My mind never stops...

I need to repeat some positive affirmations each day. Alexa- open daily affirmations....

PS Right- Dave. To some questions, there are no answers. I am hoping what is feeling like a loss right now will feel like a win in another couple of months.

 

[bluehende]

Go and have fun. The little bit of difference in cash you can save on vacation is a drop in the bucket. Relax and I will bet when you get into that budget later you will be pleasantly surprised. I know when I retired I was bit surprised how much money you saved by not having work expenses and having more time to take care of things yourself.

 

[DaveNV]

I forgot to add, maybe it's time to explore ways you can make money on your own. Not so much "self employed" as "self-styled consultant." You have tremendous job skills. There must be a market out there for that, and for what you know. Could you assist your former customers with streamlining their businesses to more efficiently use those services? Could you market yourself to other businesses like theirs, or similar ones, and in effect, go into direct competition with your old employer? Wouldn't THAT be a kick in the pants?

Dave

 

[pedro47]

To the OP, good luck in the future and please stay focus. Relax and keep your head up and do not look back at this experience .

 

[Panina]

I made it through this short week. He asked me into his office to briefly meet with him and the new clinical director who is butting into the marketing area - smh... Anyway- said he just wanted to go over a list of where I am at before the new woman starts. I had everything handled, of course. I had to ask him when the new person starts (though I already knew) and then he tells me that he is hiring a second marketing person! Why tell me that? Why would I care? I asked if that person was starting the same week as the other and he said he didn't know- depended on the budget. I suspect it is the guy who is a 1099 who already works for the company for some of the other sites they have. IF he is even telling the truth, which I doubt.

Then he tells me he lost the list of my contacts I sent to him back in the spring and if I still had it and could send it to him. I told him I did not. He looked annoyed and indicated he couldn't believe i didn't save it. I told him I had no reason to save it after I sent it to him- that I eventually delete things I don't need. I told him I would type him up a new list- that it was not a big deal. Told him what I do in my job in innate. I know them all off the top of my head.

Today I sent them to him and he said he appreciated it. Of course, I should have told him where to go and not sent the list. But I am trying to remain professional and I want to get my vacation pay and get that last week of work in when I get back from the vacation. The paychecks will stop after that, which is freaking me out.

Was his birthday today and supposedly an email went out to "some" employees to contribute to a cake- not me, of course- but also some others did not get the email either. At lunch, his "harem" was singing happy birthday to him as me and a few of my other colleagues looked on in silence. I wanted to vomit. LOL!

Neither he or the clinical director or any of his minions have not even mentioned my departure to me in terms of what my plans are or anything. Zippo. All are very cold towards me. They could care less. And neither has the ex-CEO of our company (that sold to this new company) whom I still see on occasion and worked for these past 13 years- shows what he is made of. I am sure he must know I am leaving. Unbelievable....

The techs are all complaining about getting numerous emails with threats of disciplinary action for this or that. The techs and nurses, who I am close with - many have been there a while like me- they keep asking what kind of wine I drink so I know they are planning amongst themselves something for when I leave.

I have been visiting all my clients/doctors offices and saying goodbye. I am telling them exactly what happened but also I am telling them our doctors and our technicians that are there are a good crew - that it is just management that has been an issue- but I wanted them to know what transpired- to hear it from me. Some cried. I cried. Lots of hugging. Many were so surprised to hear the news. It all feels surreal. Best part of my job was some of these wonderful people I have met along the way.

I still haven't wrapped my head around this whole thing. I always thought I would be ecstatic to quit work but because of the circumstances I don't feel that way. I can't seem to unwind from it.

I am off to the Cape in another day, so I am hoping to get my mind off of it, and then I have the one more week left at work. Will be interesting.

What a year it has been.

What you feel is normal being you have been on the edge of leaving for months. I believe once a few weeks go by you will love early retirement (I did) and you will look and feel 10 years younger. Stress can cause so much conflict within ourselves. I have learned to live on less when I had to, that will be much less stressful then for you then staying at the job. It is hard to let go when you are still there. Soon it will be over and I truly believe when this door closes for you another one will open for you that will be better then you ever expected. Hugs.

 

[lockewong]

What a year it has been.

I wanted to give you big hugs and support like Dave NW. Believe in yourself. I can surmise from all the posts on this thread that some of us have experienced a bit of your trauma. Go to your week on Cape Cod and heal yourself. Do not think, obsess, or doubt about your situation. There is always a reason. I agree with Panina... know you have the support and the emotional backing of TUG. You have done nothing WRONG. And, as you have stated, you have tried to be professional. Do not second guess anything. Please.

 

[Patri]

What you feel is normal being you have been on the edge of leaving for months. I believe once a few weeks go by you will love early retirement (I did) and you will look and feel 10 years younger.

The difference is when you choose to retire, and when it's forced on you. It's been two years since I was let go (almost blindsided) so I can relate to MaryAnn. I work two days a week now and it is not enough. Too much free time on my hands, and long evenings (since DH is in assisted living). I am looking for another PT job for two days.

 

[Talent312]

I retired at age 62 (DW already retired) after I determined that our income-stream would be enuff to provide the same lifestyle as we had when I was working.

For some peep, their work is their identity. For me, there was a period of adjustment, but after a few months, I did not miss it at all. When asked about retirement now, I say, "Every day is Saturday."

.

 

[bogey21]

For me, there was a period of adjustment, but after a few months, I did not miss it at all.

I was a workaholic and wondered if I would have trouble adjusting to retirement. Amazingly it took me all of 24 hours...

George

 

[WinniWoman]

The difference is when you choose to retire, and when it's forced on you. It's been two years since I was let go (almost blindsided) so I can relate to MaryAnn. I work two days a week now and it is not enough. Too much free time on my hands, and long evenings (since DH is in assisted living). I am looking for another PT job for two days.

That's it! If I was retiring on my own terms when I wanted I would be ecstatic. I will miss being around some people, because it is very lonely where I live and I like a little bit of social interaction. But I will come up with something later on. Just not now. Maybe volunteer- don't know.

Starting over in a job- my time being owned by a company- doesn't appeal to me at this stage to say the least. My last day at work will be the last day of summer and my new life starts the first day of Fall! I like the idea of that!

I briefly looked at job ads. After reading some the descriptions, all I could say was- uh.....no. LOL!

Sorry about your husband. Must be so very hard on you. Hope you find that second job you want and it helps to fill your time and spirit.

 

[bizaro86]

Maybe try some freelance type work? Some can be done remotely, via sites like Upwork. Your marketing experience might lend itself to copywriting or similar type work, and you could do that from any location, including a remote one.

Just an idea, and I wish you the best of luck on your transition. I was laid off a few years ago and its a big adjustment. I hope you are treated fairly regarding your final pay, etc.