[2007] Close Encounters Of The Doofus Kind.

[spirits]

Courtesy of my DH

Have you ever met someone who got a concussion while bowling? You have now. I don't even want to explain that one!


You need to let go of the ball!!!

 

[AwayWeGo]

Doofus Car Safety Inspection.

The car passed inspection, new horn & all, so it is officially good to go for another year.

On the windshield sticker showing that the car passed safety inspection, the official inspector wrote "Scion" in the space for the make of the automobile.

It's a Nissan.

I didn't notice till we were timeshare vacationing in Florida a couple of weeks later.

So it goes.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[AwayWeGo]

Double Dose Of Doofus Appliance Repair.

The Chief Of Staff noticed that the washing machine would not fill with hot water or warm water, only cold. That made it my duty to figure out the problem & get it fixed, preferably pronto.

Fortunately I did not start off by tearing into the washing machine. Before trying that, I wanted to make sure the water hose connected to hot was actually supplying a steady flow.

So I disconnected the hot water hose at the washing machine end, inserted the loose end into a 1/2 gallon container, & turned on the water.

At 1st a little came out, then more, then nothing. It acted as if something was stuck inside the hose. While I went to the basement for a replacement, The Chief Of Staff went outside & connected the faulty hose to the garden hose spigot & turned it on. Nothing happened, she reported.

l went out & screwed the other end of the hose onto the spigot & turned on the water. Plenty flowed through that way. Apparently the hose is equipped with some kind of tricky internal auto-stop anti-flood feature that only works in 1 direction. (A tag stuck on the hose -- that I never read before -- says something about that. Who knew?)

So I reconnected the formerly faulty hose to the washing machine, with the water flowing through the same direction as when it tested OK outside.

So far, so good.

Why the hose worked OK for as long as it did while hooked up backwards cannot be explained. So it goes.

Meanwhile, our niece's clothes dryer quit heating. No problem. We are experienced at zombie dryer repair, bringing deadsters back to life more times than we can recount.

From the basement miscellaneous box, I brought up a selection of likely parts -- heater element, thermistor, thermostat, etc. With that stuff plus a bunch of tools & testers packed in the car, we drove on over to our niece's house.

With the front off the dryer & the top panel loose, I used a circuit tester on the heater element (OK), the safety thermostat (OK), & the thermistor (OK). I also checked the centrifugal switch on the drive motor (OK). All those parts tested good & the heat still did not come on. Shux.

Next I managed to open up the control panel for a look at the heat control & main timer switch, which were surrounded by a formidable-looking array of wires & switches & 1 imposing electronic circuit board.

The circuit board was a red flag. I understand electricity (more or less) -- either it's on or it's off. Electronics are something else again that I don't pretend to understand 1 bit.

Fortunately some folded-up sheets of paper tucked inside the control panel contained a check-list for various operational problems, including no heat. Most of the things on the list I had already tested. The remaining untested items were (a) the electronic control & (b) the heater relay.

I decided to take a chance on the heater relay. For only $33 (including tax) I got an OEM replacement from the nearby Trible's store. If that took care of the problem, fine. If replacing the relay did not fix it, then I was out of luck. No way I would spring for a costly replacement electronic control without having a lots better idea of what I was doing.

Connecting the new heater relay involved 2 screws + 4 wires on quick-connect push-on terminals. After putting that on, I tried out the dryer before putting it all back together. Within seconds, the heat element warmed up & started to glow, so I declared the heat problem fixed & went about reinstalling the drum & the belt & the top panel & the front panel & the control panel & all that. The dryer is once again good to go -- for now.

None of that stuff was on my Secret Agenda for today, which mainly envisioned just drinking coffee & typing on the electric computer & maybe practicing horn a little & going to Planet Fitness for a routine session on the hamster wheel. But with help from The Chief Of Staff, both unplanned non-agenda items got taken care of without much fuss or trouble.

Is this a great country or what ?

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[Passepartout]

Good Job, Alan! You are my hero on more than one level.

I consider myself fairly handy and have a workbench to prove it. (no job worth doing is not worth buying a new tool or two) However, tearing into the bowels of household appliances is pretty much the domain of the appliance repair guy. Maybe when I'm your age, enough of your confidence will have rubbed off for me to attack these, but I'm afraid that age-wise I'm already nipping at your heels and I detect no rubbing.

Looking forward to the continuing adventures!

Jim

 

[Talent312]

I stopped patting myself on the back on the day when (a few years ago), I tried to to change out a shower valve w/o shutting off the water supply, and had to call the city out to cut off the master valve while we bailed water out of the tub thru a window. It made the time I shorted out the stove becuz I forgot to trip the circuit breaker seem like small potatoes.

 

[AwayWeGo]

Anopther Doofus Move -- I Spilled Coffee Onto The Computer Keyboard.

I was typing away on a new eBay listing -- just a miscellaneous item, not a French horn -- & a careless hand gesture dumped my steaming mug of fresh-brewed decaf all over my USB keyboard.

The careless gesture was not the problem.

The problem was carelessly setting the mug on the computer desk right next to the keyboard, where it created a spill hazard no matter how carefully I thought I was handling it.

Fortunately, I had a spare USB keyboard stashed in an upstairs closet, just in case something unfortunate happened to the keyboard that was connected to the computer. That's because I am not the 1st person around here to spill a beverage on the keyboard while computing. After it happened the other time, I made sure we had a spare keyboard on hand in just in case.

What makes this episode even worse is that it's exactly the kind of thing I have cautioned others against time & again -- & now I go & do it myself.

What a doofus !

(Me, not you.)

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[Patri]

Did you put the wet one in a bag of rice?

 

[AwayWeGo]

At Least It Was Just A Keyboard & Not A Folding Portable Computer.

Did you put the wet one in a bag of rice?

Keyboard that got coffee spilled all over it is disconnected & air-drying in an upside-down position.

In 6 months or a year, after it's had plenty of time to dry, maybe I'll hook it up & see whether it works.

I'm assuming it won't.

So it goes.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[tuc]

Keyboard that got coffee spilled all over it is disconnected & air-drying in an upside-down position.

In 6 months or a year, after it's had plenty of time to dry, maybe I'll hook it up & see whether it works.

I'm assuming it won't.

So it goes.

You may want to rinse it with clean water before hanging it to dry. Not only might it wash away some crud (which, unless it's conductive crud, I guess wouldn't matter much) but it should smell less like coffee when it's dry.

It shouldn't take anywhere near six months to dry and, though it's not a sure thing, it is likely to work again.

 

[AwayWeGo]

Coffee-Showered Keyboard Working Again -- Mostly.

It shouldn't take anywhere near six months to dry and, though it's not a sure thing, it is likely to work again.

Keyboard that coffee spilled onto is dried out & reconnected -- works OK, except sometimes letter "v" doesn't type.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[AwayWeGo]

Flying Orange Juice Doofus.

Got aboard an AirTran Boeing 717 for a 6:30 AM flight from DCA to MCO -- didn't need to be in Orlando that early, just took advantage of a low fare.

Only mishap was spilling complimentary orange juice all over myself & the unfortunate passenger seated next to me.

At my advanced age, I should be able to drink unadulterated orange juice without any trouble. Lamentably, that was not the case today.

What a doofus! (Me, not you -- and not the guy I spilled juice on.)

Then again, if that's the worst thing that happens all week, I can gratefully live with it.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[AwayWeGo]

What Goes Round Comes Round.

Got aboard an AirTran Boeing 717 for a 6:30 AM flight from DCA to MCO -- didn't need to be in Orlando that early, just took advantage of a low fare.

Only mishap was spilling complimentary orange juice all over myself & the unfortunate passenger seated next to me.

When that October juice spill happened, I was in an AirTran aisle seat & the guy who got spilled on was in the middle seat to my right.

Yesterday, on an AirTran flight from Atlanta to DCA, I was in a middle seat next to another passenger in an aisle seat to my left. I ordered orange juice & drank it without spilling any. The passenger to my left spilled her hot coffee, with most of it soaking my left leg.

Fortunately, the liquid was not not scalding hot, just plenty warm. No injuries, not even any pain.

The lady who spilled her coffee on me was terribly embarrassed, just as I was when I was in her position & spilled orange juice on somebody. I mentioned my doofus orange juice spill on that prior flight, adding, "I know just how you feel -- & in fact, in a way it's poetic justice."

No harm. No foul. The score is even.

Meanwhile, several keys that were working for a while on the dried out coffee-spilled computer keyboard are working no longer. It's tricky trying to complete E-Mail messages, etc., without being able to type the number 1 or the letter v. Fortunately I had a spare USB keyboard in storage, so The Chief Of Staff hooked that up (because she's more deft at it than I am) & now we're typing on all keys once again.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[Passepartout]

Hard to beat poetic justice ain't it? Payback is a female dog.

Now, I don't know where I heard or read this, but once upon a time, I heard you could run a keyboard through the dishwasher. Just allow it to dry thoroughly afterwards. It was said to work fine, and if you have nothing to lose with one that's experienced a spill, give it a go.

Jim

 

[AwayWeGo]

Double Booked For Brass Quintet Gigs. What A Doofus! (Me, Not You.)

Potomac Brass Quintet has a 2-hour performance engagement this evening in Fairfax VA.

Legacy Brass Quintet has a 1-hour performance engagement starting at the same time out in Manassas VA.

Unfortunately (for me), I didn't find out about the Legacy gig till last week. I am assured that it's been on the books for weeks. Mox nix, I had the Potomac Brass gig on the calendar but not the Legacy Brass gig.

Fortunately, a good horn-playing friend (who plays rings around me) came through to fill in for me with Legacy Brass. He showed up for rehearsal in my place Tuesday & is all set to cover the Legacy performance tonight.

I don't know whether to ascribe my missing the Legacy date to inattention or to hearing loss. Either way, it's on me to keep track of when I'm spozed to be playing & where & with whom. No excuses.

Flubbing the dates is a big embarrassment that I hope not to repeat.

What a doofus !

(Me. Not you.)

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[shagnut]

I love your posts. Some of my crazeyness, Stepped on a sea urchin in St Johns , lost my drivers license (same trip) Couldn't walk, when I got home it took hours to get the needles out of my foot.

Got a cuncusion in San Franciso when my rental scooter turned over backwards and hit my head on the tarmack.

I've had two accidents at 2 water parks, one in Las Vegas & once in Daytona. Both with trips to ER & both while on vacation.

Stepped in a pothole at Bandelier Nat'l Monument & almost broke my
bad ankle but thank goodness I was wearing my leg brace so it didn't break.

There are plenty more but here is the best one , and it is so bad I've never told it before: Are you ready????

I dislocated my elbow wiping my butt on the toilet!! :annoyed: I had to go to the emergency room to have it put back in.
It was the same day I came back from vacation.

I think I win!! shaggy

 

[AwayWeGo]

Gave Up On Coffee-Spilled Keyboard.

Keyboard that coffee spilled onto is dried out & reconnected -- works OK, except sometimes letter "v" doesn't type.

Letter "v" that quit typing did not come back.

Fully functional replacement keyboard from Amazon Dot Com is now installed where its coffee-damaged predecessor used to be.

Old keyboard is out of here.

So it goes.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[AwayWeGo]

Delaware Doofus.

What a doofus !

(Me, not you.)

Out in back of our dinky non-traveling travel trailer this afternoon, I was cutting back some heavy growth behind our site at the little campground near Rehoboth Beach, Delaware.

Unfortunately I did not remember to be careful of the satellite TV cable till right after I snipped through it with the pruning shears.

What a doofus !

( Me, not you. )

Fortunately, The Chief Of Staff quickly located a suitable length of appropriate coaxial cable, with end-connectors already installed.

It didn't take long to get the damaged cable out & the replacement cable placed & connected. The TV works.

I'll be more careful next time I'm doing anything with pruning shears.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[MuranoJo]

Where would you be without your 'Chief of Staff?' Sounds like she's a keeper.

 

[AwayWeGo]

A Keeper For Sure.

Where would you be without your 'Chief of Staff?' Sounds like she's a keeper.

I would be in deep sludge without her.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[Talent312]

I am in awe of your achievements in doofusness and doubt I could come close.

Recently, when changing a shower-valve trim, I pulled the valve off the pipes.
The "dome-cover" was sticking and I wrenched the whole assembly apart.
The plumber only charged me ~$500 for what started out as a $50 update.

Ces la vie... It's only $$...
.