Smoking Neighbor

[Nancy]

We live in a second floor condo in Florida part of the time. There aren't too many months when we can leave doors and windows open, but right now is one of them. Our downstairs neighbor is a smoker. His wife doesn't let him smoke in their condo, so he sits at edge of his lanai and smokes. The smoke comes right up into our unit. We bought a fan thinking we could maybe blow the smoke back out, but that doesn't help. He's a friend, and we don't want to say anything to ruin the friendship. Does anybody have any suggestions, besides closing doors and windows and turning on A/C, to keep the smoke out of our unit?

Thanks
Nancy

ps. This isn't meant to be controversial about smoking, but both DH and DS have health issues that are made worse with cigarette smoke.

 

[Passepartout]

Why should you feel bad about offending the guy? His wife doesn't. Obviously he knows his smoking is offensive, harmful and though he can't smell himself, it stinks. Tell him as you told us that you have health issues, you tried to mitigate it with the fan, but at least for the time that you can enjoy open doors, to smoke elsewhere.

I know. There's nothing as righteous as a reformed smoker. I am one- 18+ years- and I have no sympathy, and if my browbeating gets them to quit, all the better.

I believe in the right of the smoker to do do to him/herself whatever they wish, but:

The rights of the smoker end at my nose!

Jim Ricks

 

[DeniseM]

What are the condo's rules and local laws regarding smoking?

 

[BevL]

What are the condo's rules and local laws regarding smoking?

Exactly. We had this same problem in our building and being on the strata council, it was not pleasant. Basically it came down to there is no bylaw prohibiting smoking on one's limited common property (the patio).

We suggested that these two neighbours try to work out an equitable solution. They did by the downstairs neighbour agreeing to smoke outside for only an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon/early eveing, sort of when she gets up before going to work and after coming home from work.

Perhaps a polite conversation with your neighbour would have the same result.

 

[Patri]

Can he smoke in the front of the condo? Put out a lawn chair or something.

 

[Rose Pink]

It's my opinion that a person has the right to smoke on their own property but they do not have the right to pollute the neighbor's property. In other words, he can smoke if he can keep the smoke confined to his property. Maybe he needs to build himself a smoking room/shed. Do those smokeless ashtrays work at all? I agree with Jim. Talk to him. If he is a good friend, he will understand your concerns and health issues. He isn't just hurting himself, he is hurting others. That's just not right.

 

[wackymother]

I was actually hoping you had a SMOKIN' neighbor.

Alas, he's just a smoking neighbor.

 

[laura1957]

If talking to him about this is going to ruin the friendship - then it can't be much of a friendship to start with. He probably does not realize that his smoke is affecting you. I would not be confrontational about it but I would certainly let him know that it bothers you, why it affects you, and that you have tried to take care of it yourself. If he IS a friend then between all of you maybe you can think of another solution to his not smoking in his condo or on the edge of the lanai.

 

[Zac495]

Absolutely say something in a nice way.
"Did you know smoke travels up not down? Boy - it really should be the other way! Seriously, not to offend ou in the least, but when you smoke outside, do you realize the smoke it going up into my balcony?" (at this point it's likely the smoker will start apologizing). Then suggest where he can move a chair - offer to buy him a lawn chair.

Second hand smoke is dangerous. You have every right to ask him to keep it from you - always try to be nice first in my opinion. Let us know how it works out!

 

[Keitht]

I fully understand that the OP doesn't like the smell of cigarette / cigar smoke, I'm not a fan of it myself, but I very much doubt that the smoke is actually doing any physical harm. By the time it has travelled up a storey it's going to be pretty 'diluted'. Unless the neighbour is a chain smoker I really think there is a degree of over reaction.

 

[vacationhopeful]

Figure out where the smoke is strongest, put the guest chair there and invite his wife up to that unit and chair when he is outside smoking. As I too suffer when smokers' output hits me and turn deep red while coughing, the visual effects cause my true friends to NOT light up in my presence in the future.

He most likely has positioned his chair to catch the wind to keep the smoke out of his condo, per his wife's request.

 

[Nancy]

Thanks

Thanks for all the responses. Guess I'll say something to the wife when the time is right.

I'll revisit this thread afterwards.

Nancy

 

[pjrose]

Absolutely say something in a nice way....... You have every right to ask him to keep it from you - always try to be nice first in my opinion. Let us know how it works out!

Next time it's coming up into your window, stick your head out and call down nicely, "John, could you please move your chair? Your smoke's coming into my window. Thanks!"

 

[ricoba]

Next time it's coming up into your window, stick your head out and call down nicely, "John, could you please move your chair? Your smoke's coming into my window. Thanks!"

Or I guess if you don't want to be nice, you can pour a bucket of water on the poor guy......I think that would put the smoke out, but it may start another sort of fire!!!

 

[wackymother]

Next time it's coming up into your window, stick your head out and call down nicely, "John, could you please move your chair? Your smoke's coming into my window. Thanks!"

I like this one.

 

[grest]

I llike it too.
Connie

 

[rosebud5]

Unless there are rules that forbid it, I think it is rude to tell someone to not smoke. I dont smoke, but my wife does. If you smell smoke, go inside and wait 10 minutes. Last thing I would want while on vacation, is someone trying to dictate what i can and cannot do.

 

[RichM]

At least your neighbor just smokes tobacco cigarettes upwind from you.. Sometimes when I run out to the garage for another gallon of milk I feel like I might get a contact high on the way back inside.

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[DeniseM]

Unless there are rules that forbid it, I think it is rude to tell someone to not smoke. I dont smoke, but my wife does. If you smell smoke, go inside and wait 10 minutes. Last thing I would want while on vacation, is someone trying to dictate what i can and cannot do.

They aren't on vacation - this is happening at their home...

 

[NTHC]

Nancy,
Why don't you just ask the neighbor to let you know before he is going to smoke so you can close your windows and doors. Tell him it wafts in and bothers your son so a heads up would be great.

That way you aren't telling him not to smoke, you are just letting him know it has become an issue.

See how he handles it and then you can go from there.

Cindy

 

[rosebud5]

Thanks for point out that the person is not on vacation. It's still rude!!!!!!

 

[pjrose]

I don't think we're saying "don't smoke". We're suggesting how to negotiate a situation so that the neighbor can enjoy his cigarette while the OP can enjoy her clean air and neither is rude to the other.

 

[Zac495]

Thanks for point out that the person is not on vacation. It's still rude!!!!!!

It's not rude to ask someone to negotiate how to keep the smoke away from their nostrils nicely. It would be rude to say, "HEY YOU! Stop smoking! It's bothering me."

No one suggested anything of the sort.

 

[Nancy]

Update

I always like closure to a thread, so thought I'd update this one. In the end, we did nothing and said nothing. It got warmer and we closed doors and windows and turned on A/C. The right opportunity never presented itself for us to say anything. Don't have to worry about it until next winter.

Thanks for all of your thoughts and suggestions,
Nancy

 

[Keitht]

....... It got warmer and we closed doors and windows and turned on A/C. ............ Don't have to worry about it until next winter.


Nancy

What different worlds we live in. We opend the doors and windows in the summer here. It's never hot enough to need air conditioning