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Gay and legally married in our state 50th anniversary

J

Joyce

TUG Member
Joined
Jun 7, 2005
Messages
530
Reaction score
23
Location
Farmington, CT
Hope I will not be offending anyone on this board but this has always been a good area to get some opinions. Our friends and neighbors know of our 50th next year. Would it be in poor taste for us to give ourselves a celebration party and invite them or should we just celebrate on our own with a special trip?
 
A celebration with friends and loved ones is in the best possible taste. Congratulations! However you choose to celebrate will be perfect. DW and I got together after we turned 50, so for us, celebrating 50 together is unlikely. We're envious!

Jim
 
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How "Emily Post" do you want to be? You may want to ask a close friend to host the party, even if you pay for it, rather than hosting it yourself, if you are trying to be "socially correct." If you are following the "rules of etiquette" you aren't supposed to host a party for yourself. It just depends on how formal your circle of friends is, and how these things are done in your neck of the woods.

Congratulations! 50 years is impressive! :clap:
 
Hard question as I don't know your neighborhood "character".

I have a (gay) couple who is has been together over 17 years; the 3 neighbors between our houses don't talk to either of us (and I live alone) for the almost 10 years their houses have been built. Nor do the neighbors (6 of them) on the other side of me talk to me or the gay couple or the 3 neighbors between us.

My gay friends do invite me their "the every other year" Xmas parties and out to breakfast every couple of months. And we do call back and forth on various topics. If and when they have a BIG party for, say a 25 anniversity, they would invite me and their families, socialable friends and coworkers.

But I know they would NOT INVITE the other neighbors, on any side of me. We don't even know their first or last names.
 
Your friends already know, and accept, your situation so I assume the question doesn't relate to that. As far as throwing your own anniversary party I don't see any problem with that at all. Lots of couples do that all the time. If it were me I would put "No gifts please" on the invite since I am throwing the party myself but otherwise go for it.

tlwmkw
 
Congratulations!! I think a party is a great idea. If you are throwing it for yourselves, you may just want to specify "no gifts". 50 years is an amazing milestone.
 
Yes, do it. Happy occasions are worth celebrating!
 
Congratulations, Joyce! :clap:

Do whatever feels right and makes you happiest (exactly as you have done for the past 50+ years).

Maybe since there are 2 big deals to celebrate, first a party, then a special trip. :D
 
If you are deciding between throwing a party or going on a cruise, only you know if you want a big or private celebration.

If the question is whether to throw the party yourselves, by all means do! There is absolutely no reason not to put together a party yourselves as opposed to someone else putting it together.

And congratulations on 50 years - that's awesome! :):)

None of the above has - or should have - ANYTHING to do with who you happen to be in love with or married to :) :) :)
 
Anyone who has earned the right to celebrate a 50th anniversary of anything deserves a party. Throw yourselves a great one, enjoy the time with your friends and family, and THEN go away for a special vacation!

And as an aside, special congrats on your 50th! I know a gay couple here who will get married in August, on their 41st anniversary of being together. That's longer than anyone I know anywhere, gay or straight. You have them beat. :)

Dave
 
Joyce said:
Hope I will not be offending anyone on this board but this has always been a good area to get some opinions. Our friends and neighbors know of our 50th next year. Would it be in poor taste for us to give ourselves a celebration party and invite them or should we just celebrate on our own with a special trip?
Click to expand...

Congrats on your 50th!!! :)

I agree with others. Why not do both? If nobody offers to throw you a party, I think you should throw one for yourselves and invite all your friends. And, of course, you should plan a special trip too.
 
Answers are the same regardless of sexual preference, it's an incredible accomplishment, congratulations!

I think that so long as you aren't:

a) soliciting for gifts (in fact, actively refusing them, "no, no, we just want to share happiness; we have all we need" "if you must, then give a gift to charity, we would like that");

nor

b) making guests pay for their own refreshments ,

it's a great idea. Too few of us will ever hit that mark, you only get to hit it once, so celebrate with those who know and love you. You can take trips any time, and even next year won't be a special milestone anniversary.

Again, congratulations!!
 
Life is too short so I say yes to a trip and inviting your friends to your own party. If you feel uncomfortable, ask a friend to play the host role. You could still have at your house. Fifty years is quite the accomplishment. Congrats!
 
Another vote for doing both - a celebration of life and love with close friends and neighbors and a special trip to celebrate your 50 year commitment.
 
Every 5 years I do a Birthday Party Week at a timeshare destination for my siblings and spouses. I pay for the unit and everyone hosts dinners during the week. No gifts, but a great time by one and all.

You could combine the event into a large TS stay with the main party being a FRIDAY night or SATURDAY BBQ/lunch (works great on a Sunday to Sunday reservation); You would get daytrippers, Saturday motel guests, and 3 day getaway people.

I just did a 4 nite trip to PHX for Baseball Spring Training with my sister. The professional planned (by SWA - airlines) trip was to a hotel cartering a welcome outdoor party, a bus to/fro the games, group setting at the games, Texas Rangers hats, meet and greet by a REAL player, party tent one game, etc.
 
Never needed a reason to throw a party.

0, 5, 50, pick a number of years, months, days, who cares? If it makes you feel better, specify no gifts, (or not).:D

Cheers
 
I say congratulations and do what YOU want!!! This should have nothing to do with sexual orientation - we are all equal.

And it's fine to throw your own party! And it's fine to go on vacation. I say do both!

Lots of love.
Ellen
 
Do both - have a party and then take a special trip. I'm not a party kind of person, but I have gone to anniversary parties thrown by the celebrating couple. I agree with the no gifts thing but expect to get a little something from close friends.

And let me add my congratulations - you must be two good forgivers to stay together that long - LOL!!

Bev
 
I knew I could count on my tugger friends. We have looked into a cruise to a warm place in March which is when we celebrate our time together. I did not want to appear to be socially incorrect by having a party but because of your input we will do so happily, and with no gifts noted on the invitation. We will most likely celebrate in May when the weather is better for our traveling friends. Thanks, everyone!
 
Congrats

Congrats Joyce wishing you many happy more years.:)
Anna
 
Congratulations on 50 years!
I agree with others that either a party or private trip is appropriate. I like your idea of a cruise in March followed by a party in May. It is thoughtful to specify "no gifts", so your friends & family realize you want them there to celebrate with you.
 
Congratulations! Throw a party! Have fun with all your friends, neighbors, what-not, then do something special with your spouse! May the two of you celebrate many more years together!
 
congrats Joyce, what a wonderful life with your partner you have had. I'm so happy for you. Go for both!!! Hugs to you both. Shaggy
 
Joyce said:
I knew I could count on my tugger friends. We have looked into a cruise to a warm place in March which is when we celebrate our time together. I did not want to appear to be socially incorrect by having a party but because of your input we will do so happily, and with no gifts noted on the invitation. We will most likely celebrate in May when the weather is better for our traveling friends. Thanks, everyone!
Click to expand...

Sounds great! Congrats!

My vote was going to be to throw the party yourself :)
Rules about who should and who shouldn't throw a party are old fashioned and silly. Parties are fun. Throw 'em!
 
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