Downsizing your home?

[clifffaith]

I look around at all the stuff I have and despair at both psycologically unloading enough of it to move into a smaller home and being able to find someone to take it off my hands. We are in Big Bear for a few days and one of the things I love to do, when I don't have 10 other chores to attend to, is wander through the Dollar Tree. Made a determined effort to not bring anything "permanent" home, got some seasonal napkins and gift wrap; also happened upon some garage sale stickers with from 25 cents to $20 already printed. I am very organized, it takes me days to prepare for a sale, and I need to have things pre-marked otherwise it is easy to be overwhelmed by garage sale shoppers. I have lots of stuff already waiting for me to get sold, and I need all that stuff out of the basement before I start actually clearing the house. Completely unrelated to downsizing, I have already been on eBay for five years selling off collectibles I'm tired of trying to keep cats off of, and stuff I inherited from my grandmother. Sterling silver souvenir spoons that she collected need to be listed multiple times with continuing price drops to gain any interest at all.

 

[DaveNV]

I look around at all the stuff I have and despair at both psycologically unloading enough of it to move into a smaller home and being able to find someone to take it off my hands. We are in Big Bear for a few days and one of the things I love to do, when I don't have 10 other chores to attend to, is wander through the Dollar Tree. Made a determined effort to not bring anything "permanent" home, got some seasonal napkins and gift wrap; also happened upon some garage sale stickers with from 25 cents to $20 already printed. I am very organized, it takes me days to prepare for a sale, and I need to have things pre-marked otherwise it is easy to be overwhelmed by garage sale shoppers. I have lots of stuff already waiting for me to get sold, and I need all that stuff out of the basement before I start actually clearing the house. Completely unrelated to downsizing, I have already been on eBay for five years selling off collectibles I'm tired of trying to keep cats off of, and stuff I inherited from my grandmother. Sterling silver souvenir spoons that she collected need to be listed multiple times with continuing price drops to gain any interest at all.

I'm tired just reading what you have to deal with. I think Passpartout Jim said it earlier - something about "using a match."

My Mom had many dozens of souvenir collector spoons I bought her over the years. I brought her spoons from all over the world. She loved them, and traveled vicariously through me. When she died, they all kind of disappeared. I hope whoever took them is enjoying them as much as Mom did.

Dave

 

[VacationForever]

We did not sell off anything when we moved, it was just too much of a hassle. We called the city junk collection truck and put out items that we knew that no one would want. The great stuff - lightly used/like new furniture, Christmas decor, tools, carpet cleaner, Dolphin pool cleaner, artwork, wall decor, fancy mirrors were all left behind for the new owner. We told our agent to let them know that they can sell or junk whatever they did not want. We left at least $50K of tangible value decor/furniture stuff behind. It helped sell our house, I am sure. The buyer was thrilled and wanted in writing that the house was sold as-is, because of the furnishings but the house was still very new/clean I guess they did not worry about issues. Usually it is the seller who sells as-is because seller does not want to fix issues with the house.

 

[DebBrown]

I never thought we would do this but we bought a vacation home this year and I love being there. It is small and life is simple. I don't miss all the "stuff" in our "real" house. So it is likely that our vacation home will become a retirement home in a few years. We would probably need a small house in our hometown to be near our children but maybe not.

 

[klpca]

It's not just us. It's everyone

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/08/18/...s-of-stuff-and-children-who-dont-want-it.html

 

[FLDVCFamily]

I look around at all the stuff I have and despair at both psycologically unloading enough of it to move into a smaller home and being able to find someone to take it off my hands. We are in Big Bear for a few days and one of the things I love to do, when I don't have 10 other chores to attend to, is wander through the Dollar Tree. Made a determined effort to not bring anything "permanent" home, got some seasonal napkins and gift wrap; also happened upon some garage sale stickers with from 25 cents to $20 already printed. I am very organized, it takes me days to prepare for a sale, and I need to have things pre-marked otherwise it is easy to be overwhelmed by garage sale shoppers. I have lots of stuff already waiting for me to get sold, and I need all that stuff out of the basement before I start actually clearing the house. Completely unrelated to downsizing, I have already been on eBay for five years selling off collectibles I'm tired of trying to keep cats off of, and stuff I inherited from my grandmother. Sterling silver souvenir spoons that she collected need to be listed multiple times with continuing price drops to gain any interest at all.

There is a little church thrift store that I stop into on the way to pick the kids up periodically. They have had this very large set of those sterling souvenir spoons for months. I don't know if they've sold a single one (doesn't look like it). I have a feeling they are destined for the dumpster eventually.

 

[FLDVCFamily]

Well, one of my best friends and I went to her Father-In-Law's (pristine, beautifully kept) home last week as he had moved into assisted living and is eager to clean out the house and put it up for sale. I sell on Ebay so he thought maybe I could spot items that were worth selling. He has the most gorgeous house full of midcentury-modern, Danish teak furniture in mint condition. So far, I basically can't give it away on Craigslist despite trying. Of course, there is the requisite decor to go with it, also the cabinet full of fine china. All this stuff cost a pretty penny no doubt, and it was incredibly well cared-for. Literally nobody wants it. I think in the right hipster part of the country, this stuff would probably do well. Unfortunately, in coastal FL it's a dime a dozen apparently. The estate sale people he contacted told him he would have to pay them $1000 up-front and then they'd have the sale. I'm not even sure he would net enough to pay the $1000 fee. It's actually really depressing to me and it's not even my stuff. It will probably end up donated to the thrift store if we can even get them to come pick it up.

 

[klpca]

Well, one of my best friends and I went to her Father-In-Law's (pristine, beautifully kept) home last week as he had moved into assisted living and is eager to clean out the house and put it up for sale. I sell on Ebay so he thought maybe I could spot items that were worth selling. He has the most gorgeous house full of midcentury-modern, Danish teak furniture in mint condition. So far, I basically can't give it away on Craigslist despite trying. Of course, there is the requisite decor to go with it, also the cabinet full of fine china. All this stuff cost a pretty penny no doubt, and it was incredibly well cared-for. Literally nobody wants it. I think in the right hipster part of the country, this stuff would probably do well. Unfortunately, in coastal FL it's a dime a dozen apparently. The estate sale people he contacted told him he would have to pay them $1000 up-front and then they'd have the sale. I'm not even sure he would net enough to pay the $1000 fee. It's actually really depressing to me and it's not even my stuff. It will probably end up donated to the thrift store if we can even get them to come pick it up.

Mid century modern (mcm out here, lol) would sell fast. Funny how areas differ.

 

[FLDVCFamily]

Mid century modern (mcm out here, lol) would sell fast. Funny how areas differ.

Yep, and here it ends up on the curb getting rained on (I'm not even kidding...I rescued a MCM desk on the curb from an impending downpour). Nobody here wants it...it's not "beachy" enough for where we live.

 

[SueDonJ]

We're in the process, too. After buying a few years ago what will eventually be our retirement home on Hilton Head Island, and Don spending a couple years working in India, we're convinced that our home here in Massachusetts is a total waste for me and Don now. Both kids got married in 2013 and are starting their own families and Don still spends a couple months every year on work travel, so I find myself roaming around this big house and resenting the time it takes for me to keep it looking the way it looks best. It's been a wonderful home for extended family to enjoy over the years, too, but the days of all of us getting together frequently are, sadly, behind us all. This house needs a new family to make wonderful memories in it!

We put it on the market and got offers immediately so we're under contract now, looking at a closing in mid-November. The moving boxes are coming in this week and a dumpster next week, but our kids are coming in to take what they want before we start the process. Then when they're done we'll let the rest of the family have dibs before we donate whatever else we don't want to Habitat for Humanity. Honestly, it's not the process that's worrying me right now but rather that our kids may come in and decide that the "trappings" that formed their holiday/family memories aren't important enough to take. I understand - they don't want to be burdened by all of it any more than we do - but still I know I'll be disappointed if they go home with only a few things. (And I have to work on that so they don't feel a responsibility to take what they don't want.)

The last day here will be very sad, very difficult, despite knowing that we're downsizing here in Massachusetts to a 2BR condo that's closer to our kids. But no matter how sad it turns out to be leaving wonderful neighbors and this house that's been home for 21 years, we are VERY excited about turning the condo into something that gives us easy, comfortable living.

Best of luck to everyone going through the process - and hopefully your list-making skills are a little better than mine. Some days it's exhausting just thinking about all that needs to be done!

 

[ronandjoan]

here's some good advice from Marie Kondo's book..it has helped us through our second time of downsizing.. ongoing now. We downsized once when we sold the Ohio 2000 sq ft 1890-old Victorian house , which I loved, and Timesharing full time, being absolutely "homeless" for 7 years.


Here is the link with great ideas for decluttering and downsizing

https://www.onekingslane.com/live-love-home/marie-kondo-book-declutter/

Joan
Timesharing full time BLOG


http://ronandjoanjourney.blogspot.com

 

[vacationhopeful]

I have Tyler ... he will throw everything out that you do no have on your person (wearing or holding). He believes if you are 1 person .. you need only 1 plate, bowl, glass, pot, spoon and 1 chair etc.

The only good thing about Tyler is, he goes home at 3PM. But you do get downsized effectively ... I am still looking for my Lenox china .. both the xmas set and the formal dinner set. it has to be SOMEWHERES ... maybe in my warehouse.

I do know where my tax records are.

 

[VacationForever]

We downsized to our 3BR/3.5BA condo, 2835 sq ft and it is so small compared to our old place, which means we have no room for even half the stuff we brought over. We swear that we won't buy anymore stuff for the house and we will never moved again. We also left behind all Christmas stuff, which was quite sad for me, but we also know that we prefer never to put up a Christmas tree again as taking it down after Christmas is more work than putting it up.

 

[jackio]

Honestly, it's not the process that's worrying me right now but rather that our kids may come in and decide that the "trappings" that formed their holiday/family memories aren't important enough to take. I understand - they don't want to be burdened by all of it any more than we do - but still I know I'll be disappointed if they go home with only a few things. (And I have to work on that so they don't feel a responsibility to take what they don't want.)


Best of luck to everyone going through the process - and hopefully your list-making skills are a little better than mine. Some days it's exhausting just thinking about all that needs to be done!

This is exactly what we are going through. The stuff that I bought through the years to make our children's holidays memorable - they want NONE of it. Even my pack rat daughter who made my life miserable with her hoarding tendencies when she lived at home wants nothing. A local scout group was doing a thrift store fundraiser. They were paid by the pound. I called them and gave them several boxes. A lot of stuff went to the town dump. There is still a lot left. We are downsizing to a 2 BR and we have accumulated a lot of stuff in our 31 years here.

 

[T-Dot-Traveller]

This is exactly what we are going through. The stuff that I bought through the years to make our children's holidays memorable - they want NONE of it. Even my pack rat daughter who made my life miserable with her hoarding tendencies when she lived at home wants nothing. A local scout group was doing a thrift store fundraiser. They were paid by the pound. I called them and gave them several boxes. A lot of stuff went to the town dump. There is still a lot left. We are downsizing to a 2 BR and we have accumulated a lot of stuff in our 31 years here.

Take pictures with an I- pad and also "store" them in a cloud somewhere ( in case you lose the I-pad )
Hoarding pictures ( electronically ) takes up a lot less space

 

[klpca]

We're in the process, too. After buying a few years ago what will eventually be our retirement home on Hilton Head Island, and Don spending a couple years working in India, we're convinced that our home here in Massachusetts is a total waste for me and Don now. Both kids got married in 2013 and are starting their own families and Don still spends a couple months every year on work travel, so I find myself roaming around this big house and resenting the time it takes for me to keep it looking the way it looks best. It's been a wonderful home for extended family to enjoy over the years, too, but the days of all of us getting together frequently are, sadly, behind us all. This house needs a new family to make wonderful memories in it!

We put it on the market and got offers immediately so we're under contract now, looking at a closing in mid-November. The moving boxes are coming in this week and a dumpster next week, but our kids are coming in to take what they want before we start the process. Then when they're done we'll let the rest of the family have dibs before we donate whatever else we don't want to Habitat for Humanity. Honestly, it's not the process that's worrying me right now but rather that our kids may come in and decide that the "trappings" that formed their holiday/family memories aren't important enough to take. I understand - they don't want to be burdened by all of it any more than we do - but still I know I'll be disappointed if they go home with only a few things. (And I have to work on that so they don't feel a responsibility to take what they don't want.)

The last day here will be very sad, very difficult, despite knowing that we're downsizing here in Massachusetts to a 2BR condo that's closer to our kids. But no matter how sad it turns out to be leaving wonderful neighbors and this house that's been home for 21 years, we are VERY excited about turning the condo into something that gives us easy, comfortable living.

Best of luck to everyone going through the process - and hopefully your list-making skills are a little better than mine. Some days it's exhausting just thinking about all that needs to be done!

I admire you Sue. We know that we need to cut the big house loose, but I can't do it yet. So, condo first, then to HHI for retirement? That's an interesting plan. Good luck on the moves!

 

[klpca]

We downsized to our 3BR/3.5BA condo, 2835 sq ft and it is so small compared to our old place, which means we have no room for even half the stuff we brought over. We swear that we won't buy anymore stuff for the house and we will never moved again. We also left behind all Christmas stuff, which was quite sad for me, but we also know that we prefer never to put up a Christmas tree again as taking it down after Christmas is more work than putting it up.

Funny - the Christmas stuff is the only thing that the family is supposed to grab in case of a fire (we live on the edge of a canyon preserve and fire season is always a worry). My friend who lost her home in the 2007 fire said that those were the only things that she truly missed.

I spend three weeks decorating for Christmas. I'm hosting three parties this year to make it worth my while

 

[silentg]

Our daughter and son in law want to buy our house. My husband doesn’t want to sell it to them because our son does not have a house. He is single and lives in South Florida. I told him that his room would be there for him when he visits and his sister says the same. We are going to purge some stuff this winter and travel a bit around Florida in our timeshares. I may bring up the idea of selling to our daughter again after we do some cleaning out stuff we don’t need. DD and SIL have a house that they like, but she likes our house more. Time will tell. If we keep it in the family it won’t be hard to leave.
Silentg

 

[VacationForever]

Our daughter and son in law want to buy our house. My husband doesn’t want to sell it to them because our son does not have a house. He is single and lives in South Florida. I told him that his room would be there for him when he visits and his sister says the same. We are going to purge some stuff this winter and travel a bit around Florida in our timeshares. I may bring up the idea of selling to our daughter again after we do some cleaning out stuff we don’t need. DD and SIL have a house that they like, but she likes our house more. Time will tell. If we keep it in the family it won’t be hard to leave.
Silentg

It was hard for my son when I decided to sell the home. It was way too large for him but he really did not want to move. He finally found a small house to buy and we assisted him through the process.

 

[silentg]

Our son moved 12 years ago, has no plans to move back to our house, but he still visits.

 

[Egret1986]

Take pictures with an I- pad and also "store" them in a cloud somewhere ( in case you lose the I-pad )
Hoarding pictures ( electronically ) takes up a lot less space

OK, so I have the dilemma now of liquidating my Mom's house and all her possessions. Like many, I have my own stuff and don't need her stuff. My son went through her house and what he took fit in his back seat and trunk of his car.

The pictures.....the boxes and albums of pictures! I asked someone about them who said, "oh, you can't get rid of pictures."

I have my own large tub of pictures and tons of photo albums.

OK, so you take the time to scan pictures and store them, then what? What do you do with the actual pictures? A landfill?

Gosh, my Mom told me to do an estate sale. But I really don't think there's enough stuff to make that a worthwhile endeavor now. It's kind of depressing. A lifetime of amassing stuff, only to find no one wants or needs your stuff.

Then I see all these people that have lost everything to the hurricanes and fires....

 

[Talent312]

A couple of months ago, our next-door neighbor died.
Last month, her family conducted 3 weekly estate sales.
There was a lot of traffic, but not much was carted away.
It seems they actually thought the used stuff had value.
Last week, a Goodwill truck showed up and took a lot.

I told our kids that:
If I survive DW, I intend to pare down to a small condo.
If she survives me, they'll have to deal with the house.
... and good luck with that.

.

 

[DaveNV]

OK, so I have the dilemma now of liquidating my Mom's house and all her possessions. Like many, I have my own stuff and don't need her stuff. My son went through her house and what he took fit in his back seat and trunk of his car.

The pictures.....the boxes and albums of pictures! I asked someone about them who said, "oh, you can't get rid of pictures."

I have my own large tub of pictures and tons of photo albums.

OK, so you take the time to scan pictures and store them, then what? What do you do with the actual pictures? A landfill?

Gosh, my Mom told me to do an estate sale. But I really don't think there's enough stuff to make that a worthwhile endeavor now. It's kind of depressing. A lifetime of amassing stuff, only to find no one wants or needs your stuff.

Then I see all these people that have lost everything to the hurricanes and fires....

My Mom's pictures are the majority of what remains, and she's been gone since 1996. She had a huge steamer trunk her brother had made for her in wood shop class that is FILLED, CRAMMED, STUFFED full of pictures and memorabilia, and several shoeboxes full of just negatives - both from her, but also from her father, my granddad. My poor sister is doing her best to sort the pictures into piles, and she's going to just send manila envelopes of images to various family members. The negatives we're going to give to a cousin, who thinks he may know most of the people in them. He will scan them for distribution to the family. All I know is I don't want them back. I already have all the photo albums of the family I want.

And to complicate the issue, my spouse has a degree in commercial photography. Our home is full of photography equipment. I built a network attached storage (NAS) for our home computer network just to store those digital images - and at latest count, the total is approaching 100,000 images. I cannot image how deep the piles would be if those images were on paper. Eek!!

Dave

 

[MuranoJo]

This thread seems to be a theme that resonates through the ages, and we're right there with you--facing the same downsizing issues.
Although I fully expect we'll just stay in our current house, my concern is getting rid of possessions/clutter now vs. later.
I haven't quite convinced DH to start getting rid of his various collections. (i.e, He likes to keep every book he's read, and he's read a lot.) We've had the talks about who's seriously going to want this 'stuff' when we're gone, why even burden someone to come in and clean it up, why even keep it, etc.

Sentimental feelings are strong to overcome, that's for sure!

 

[isisdave]

I realized that although we have or have had boxes of pictures and thousands online, and we continue to add to them in our travels, neither I or DW ever look at them. There are just a few on the wall. Son (25) has no interest, at least as yet.

At the end of my first marriage, I ended up with exactly zero family pictures. Although I resented that and missed them for about two years, after that it didn't seem to matter.

Maybe I'm an unsentimental coot, but perhaps we don't really put as much importance on these things as we think we're going to.