When was the last time you fell in love?

[mamiecarter]

Romantic Love is a form of sudden madness desighned to get the human race to reproduce itself, produce cooperating social groupings composed of diverse genetic make up (exogamy) to raise children. My impresion is TUGers are an older group that has pretty much settled down.

Anyone fall in love lately? (No I don't mean like the govenor of South Carolina and only a suicidal fool publicly anounces a woman other than his wife is his soul mate.) Any one remember how being in love felt? can this sort of thing happen to post forty people who are sane and sober?

 

[Karen G]

can this sort of thing happen to post forty people who are sane and sober?

I have a friend who fell in love last year and had a big, beautiful wedding in June. She is 75 and her husband is 73. Here's a picture from the wedding.

 

[Kel]

Karen, I love the photo of your friends.

I fell in love with my husband when I was 19. I’m 51 and he’s 52. I still remember how it felt. It started with that blue shirt that brought out the blue in his eyes. He was cutest thing and most fun guy I had dated. For our first date he took me horse backing riding from 9 pm to midnight. He was incredible.

Today he can sometimes drive me nuts, but the blue eyes still have me. We’ve been married 31 years (no children by choice) and have a lot of fun. Our dogs are our babies. I think we have been very lucky to have grown together and like to do a lot of the same things (skiing, diving, beach, etc.). We like to stay fit, eat healthy and enjoy life.

And, I think love can happen at any age.

 

[falmouth3]

Wonderful wedding story! Falling in love is glorious, isn't it? I fell in love with my husband at work. It was the second time for me (mid 30's) and his first. I couldn't believe the giddy feelings and feeling like a teenager again.

One of my friends was a widower and when he fell in love with his second wife he described it the same way.

Sue

 

[rickandcindy23]

For us, May 22, 1971, at the age of 16. Now we have been married 36 1/2 years. He puts up with me , but he is absolutely the best husband, dad and grandpa on the planet.

 

[Mosca]

I'm not sure how to describe it, but I'm sure everyone will understand. I was absolutely awestruck with love the day my daughter, my only child, was born. I remember that feeling like it happened just a moment ago; it's never left me.

I know it's not what you mean, but it's the first thing I thought of.

 

[Rose Pink]

We will be celebrating our 30th this year. When I told that to a neighbor she said, "you're just getting started. We've been married for 75 years."

A couple were celebrating their 50th wedding annivesary. The wife, congratulated on her successful marriage, replied, "successful? It's not over yet." IOW, things could still go wrong.

I long ago came to the conclusion that "falling in love"or being "in love" is just a euphemism for infatuation. They are the same thing. They only vary in degrees of intensity. Both are chemical reactions in the brain. I once read about the chemistry of love. And as the OP mentioned, it does have a vital purpose to society. It gets two people together long enough to produce and raise offspring. Our society celebrates being in love as though it were really love (and not just intense infatuation). The movies depict, the songs praise it. They speak of the "feeling" as in the feeling is gone, etc. Or, I love you but I'm not in love with you. Whenever we speak of love as a feeling, we are speaking of infatuation--brain chemistry--and, like other drugs, it can be quite addicting. It feels so good.

Love--real love--is not a feeling. It can be felt but is not itself a feeling. I compare it to the sun. You can feel the warmth of the sun but the sun is not, itself, a feeling. To me, true love or real love is when you wake up next to that smelly person lying in the bed next to you and think, "what did I ever see in him (her)" and you decide to stay anyway. You decide to honor your vows and you decide to behave in a kind and supportive way when you really want to tell him to take his ugly recliner ideas and go away. Or when he decides to be nice when he really can't see the difference between this chair and that one and he thinks you are being ridiculous.

Love is a choice and a behavior. Infatuation is a feeling based on chemicals and brain chemistry can change.

Of course, if you choose real love and you choose to make it through the lows you will be rewarded with fresh waves of infatuation (that feel good feeling we all love) from time to time. Just don't give up when they ebb. It's like the ocean, those feelings come and go and I would not want to base a relationship solely on them.

 

[Rose Pink]

I'm not sure how to describe it, but I'm sure everyone will understand. I was absolutely awestruck with love the day my daughter, my only child, was born. I remember that feeling like it happened just a moment ago; it's never left me.

I know it's not what you mean, but it's the first thing I thought of.

I understand totally. I think others will, too.

 

[Karen G]

Love is a choice and a behavior. Infatuation is a feeling based on chemicals and brain chemistry can change.

That's a great way to describe it, and I agree. We've been married 32 years and it's been great.

 

[caribbean]

I met David in Jan 2000, on my ex-husband's birthday, a bit of irony. I was recently divorced, as was he. I was 47 and he was 46. For the first time in my life I had a man chasing me, and although a new idea to me, it was fun. It started out as a wonderful romantic whirlwind romance. In fact, he bought our first TS as a gift for me, kind of to show his serious intention to provide great Caribbean vacations for me. Over the last almost 10 years, we have grown into the best of friends as well as lovers. We both like to do the same things which has made all the difference. Sure is easier when you can just be yourself and be accepted as is. Fortunately he also loves to travel. Our one difference is regarding snow. He spent 40+ years in Florida, loves snow, and would like to take skiing trips. I on the other hand, being from VA have had enough of the snow, have bad knees, and no interest in skiing. I adopted his football team and he took on my baseball love. We split our vacation time between Sarasota where we want to retire, NYC watching Yankee games, and various Caribbean islands, just relaxing. TSing and TUG have been a big part of making this affordable for us to do. Thanks for enriching our lives.

 

[MelBay]

We've been married 29 years, and I dearly love my husband. However, I fell in love with him, all over again, head over heels, the day the oncologist told us he had cancer last October. Made me realize how MUCH I love him. He's fine now, and hearing those words was a wonderful gift, if you can imagine.

 

[x3 skier]

Long Time Ago

Fifty Years ago this August. We dated while I was in Engineering School, got married three months after I graduated and been happy ever since.

Cheers

 

[AwayWeGo]

You Mean, To The Same Person ?

Click here for a wonderful song that explains how it is.

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​

 

[Passepartout]

Boy, you folks are a bunch of long-time married people... My Beloved And I got together almost 12 years ago. We just became One in 2003 under a beech tree at a castle in Scotland with a piper. We were 50somethings and the chemical attraction couldn't have been stronger if we'd been teenagers.
We are still much in love- more every day.

Life is VERY VERY GOOD!

Jim Ricks

 

[swift]

We just celebrated our 22nd anniversary and we are still very much in love.

 

[Courts]

This sounds like a female thread, but I'll add my two cents anyway.

The day I met my wife, was the day life expanded for me. It is like a door opened and suddenly there was so much more to my life than I ever thought possible.

We are celebrating 38 years this month.

.

 

[Pat H]

Falling in love feels the same at any age. The last time I fell in love was in 2004 when I was 56. I hope it wasn't really the last time since the relationship ended.

 

[isisdave]

This morning. Every morning.

Every time we meet after being apart even a little while, I get this fluttering feeling in my chest. She reports something similar.

Twenty years next month.

 

[pcgirl54]

Nice stories. Been married 34 yrs myself. Met DH at Sears & Roebuck. I had this odd feeling that I met the man I was going to marry. He proposed 5 weeks after our first date and we got married 2 years later. I still can't wait until he walks in the door at night and I think about him when we are apart.

Love at first is infatuation then there are ups and downs as we encounter the trials of life but for me it is about a cup of tea.

When I went back to college 12 yrs ago my husband would get up off the couch after a 12 hr workday including a 3 hr commute to make me a cup of tea at 10:30 PM. Every night for the 6 years it took me to finish no matter how tired he was.

There are so many ways one can express love but to me only a man who really loves me would do that.

 

[Janette]

I fall in love with my hubby of 43 years every day. He is constantly supporting me and helping me. We have so much fun together and are good supports when the storms hit. Seeing my baby get married last April and realizing how much I've come to love my new daughter hit my heart strings. One of the greatest love moments is holding a grandchild for the first time and remembering when their mom or dad arrived. Hearing a grandchild say"I love you Grandma" for the first time sends the heart spinning. Living in Sun City, we see older folks falling in love and think it is wonderful to find love. When one loses a spouse and falls in love again, I think it is a compliment to the spouse that one is willing to give their heart away again.

 

[Grand Vic]

What a wonderful thread this is! I was having a really bad day until I read this and remembered just how lucky I am to have my hubby of 19 years. Put a lump in my throat, but a smile on my face and in my heart.

 

[WalnutBaron]

I'm not sure how to describe it, but I'm sure everyone will understand. I was absolutely awestruck with love the day my daughter, my only child, was born. I remember that feeling like it happened just a moment ago; it's never left me.

I know it's not what you mean, but it's the first thing I thought of.

My wife of 29 years and I have three sons. I have told each of them that they are the only people I've ever known who I loved at first sight. It didn't happen with my parents, nor with my wife. But with them, it was this awesome and overwhelming sense of love and a welcomed responsibility to raise those three little boys into good men who would be great husbands and fathers someday.

 

[SueDonJ]

I love reading about all of these longterm marriages on TUG - we sure are a dedicated, committed group of folks!

Don and I have been married 28 years, some great, some good, some not so good. Some days it feels like we met only last week, others it feels like we've been forced to look at each other for generations. It wasn't love at first sight for either of us but it sure is lasting, and we're hoping for many more years together.

pcgirl, LOVE your cup of tea comment. Don's been making my first cup of tea every day for years and years, and he's a coffee drinker. It surely is the little things ...

I like the various comments about falling in love at first sight upon seeing your newborn children. That's how I feel, too. (But I'm almost embarrassed to admit, something similar happened on the day we found Bandit at the shelter. And he's been hanging around for 11 years now.)

 

[SueDonJ]

... Living in Sun City, we see older folks falling in love and think it is wonderful to find love. When one loses a spouse and falls in love again, I think it is a compliment to the spouse that one is willing to give their heart away again.

My gosh, this is just the sweetest thing EVER. It almost makes me cry.

 

[Luanne]

I'm not sure how to describe it, but I'm sure everyone will understand. I was absolutely awestruck with love the day my daughter, my only child, was born. I remember that feeling like it happened just a moment ago; it's never left me.

I know it's not what you mean, but it's the first thing I thought of.

I absolutely know what you mean. I used to get a physical ache when I'd leave my dd to go to work and could hardly wait to get home to see her again. She's now 21 and will be going away to college for the first time, leaving next week. I expect to have some of those pangs when she leaves.