12 Days of Christmas! Timeshare Sales Edition!

[TUGBrian]

so i pulled these posts from another thread as they deserve their own, huge thanks to @BaillieCH for the idea....will do some editing from group suggestions...this makes me laugh every time i read it.

On the first day of Christmas, my salesman said to me...... no increase in maintenance feeesssss!!

On the 2nd day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 3rd day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 4th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 5th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 6th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Six months no interest, FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 7th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... 7 days to cancel, Six months no interest, FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 8th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Eight claims of good investment, 7 days to cancel, Six months no interest, FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 9th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Nine fees a-hiding, Eight claims of good investment, 7 days to cancel, Six months no interest, FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 10th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Ten free drink vouchers, Nine fees a-hiding, Eight claims of good investment, 7 days to cancel, Six months no interest, FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 11th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Eleven misleading statements, Ten free drink vouchers, Nine fees a-hiding, Eight claims of good investment, 7 days to cancel, Six months no interest, FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations and no increase in maintenance feeeesss!!

On the 12th day of Christmas, my salesman gave to me..... Twelve minutes to sign my contract, Eleven misleading statements, Ten free drink vouchers, Nine fees a-hiding, Eight claims of good investment, 7 days to cancel, Six months no interest, FIVEEEE BONUS WEEKS!!! Four Dinner Gift Cards, Three reasons to not buy resale, Two free vacations

and no increase in maintenance feeeeeeeeeeeeesss!!

 

[TUGBrian]

on the second day of christmas my salesman said to meeeee, two free vacations!

and no increase in maintenance feesssss

 

[TUGBrian]

ai had some pretty funny suggestions, id like to keep this going...may start another thread as this is super entertaining!

“Twelve dreams come true-ing,
Eleven sunsets glowing,
Ten properties sharing,
Nine fees a-hiding,
Eight upgrades waiting,
Seven nights in paradise,
Six months, no interest,
FIVE MINUTES LEFT!
Four-star resorts,
Three low payments,
Two free vacations,
And this deal’s just for today, you’ll see!”

 

[chapjim]

ai had some pretty funny suggestions, id like to keep this going...may start another thread as this is super entertaining!

“Twelve dreams come true-ing,
Eleven sunsets glowing,
Ten properties sharing,
Nine fees a-hiding,
Eight upgrades waiting,
Seven nights in paradise,
Six months, no interest,
FIVE MINUTES LEFT!
Four-star resorts,
Three low payments,
Two free vacations,
And this deal’s just for today, you’ll see!”

Don't quit your day job, @TUGBrian!

 

[TolmiePeak]

Don't quit your day job, @TUGBrian!

Well if he did he could always get a job selling timeshares....

 

[klpca]

Well if he did he could always get a job selling timeshares....

We all could - we know all of the lines by heart.

 

[TUGBrian]

finally finished v2 of the song, hope everyone enjoys!

if someone can think of better terms or items for any of the 12....please post them here! I think all owners would get a kick out of this!

 

[Patri]

I hate that song (not necessarily your version.)

 

[rickandcindy23]

Funny! Love it.

 

[LannyPC]

on the second day of christmas my salesman said to meeeee, two free vacations!

But after you read all the small print, you'll see that these "free" vacations will come with a bunch of fees and taxes.

 

[TUGBrian]

suggestion to add in "7 DAYS TO CANCEL!"

Ill work that in there =) would like to keep the "reasons to not by resale" so ill replace something else.

 

[T_R_Oglodyte]

In the liturgical calendar, the 12th day of Christmas is January 6, aka Epiphany, the day when the Magi arrive and present their gifts to the infant Jesus.

Epiphany is also used to describe when someone undergoes a sudden and striking realization of a truth. Thus, the 12th day is also a logical time when a person suddenly realizes the actual truth of the sales presentation, and how they have been had. Of course, the 12th day is also five days past the rescission period .....

 

[urban5]

Quite the enjoyable ditty I think you covered all the bases.

 

[TUGBrian]

ok, v3 incorporated 7 days to cancel, just cant have a song about timeshare sales without mentioning rescission!