My mother is retired and now splits her time between us here in NC and her primary residence in Maine. The only grandchild is here....it's the only reason she is down here at all, LOL--hates the heat and humidity, so skedaddles back to Maine by mid-April. This year, she postponed her trip back by one day, so that she could spend all day today taking and staying with a friend while she has spinal surgery. The friend has no local, close family, although a neice is coming up from about a hour away to spend the night with her (so my mom can get sleep and drive early tomorrow morning.) My mom met the friend through AAUW--it's been an important social group for her since she's been spending about the half the year here for about the past six years. My mom is single and is in excellent health, does most of the after-school care for my DD, usually cooks dinner for us twice a week while she is here, and often travels with us for timeshare vacations. However, she is also very conscious about wanting to make sure that my nuclear family (DH,DD) has privacy and time to ourselves even during the months when she is "Nana in Residence." So, the AAUW buddies have provided some valuable, independent-of-us social connections, which is SO IMPORTANT to any one as they age, and other networks (work networks, parents-of-my-kids'-friends, etc.) might dwindle.
Here's the thing--I would do anything for my mother. But I also am glad to know that she has friends both here and in Maine that will "have her back" when she might need something, and that she is also there for them, too. Asking for help is a gift that you give other people, and can really cement friendships if done in a genuine, reciprocal kind of way.
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