Removing "beauty marks"

[andrea t]

My son has a beauty mark on his cheek and chin and to this 15 year old, nothing in the world is worse! The slightly larger one on his cheek is brown and half the size of a pencil top eraser. I took him to a dermatologist to be sure it could not "turn" cancerous and ask about removal. He said they go deep into the skin so they don't remove them. He said any good dermatologist would tell me the same. He said several laser treatments would lighten them, but they probably would not disappear and he might be left with a white spot. We are considering this and will also seek another opinion, but was wondering if anyone has had this done? How were the results? The poor kid is so miserable and its a tough age for this stuff!
Thanks.

 

[CarolF]

I've had no experience with beauty spots but just wondering if it is worth getting an opinion from a good plastic surgeon. My Mum had a couple of large skin cancers removed from her face and the results were fantastic. The largest one was on her jaw line and the incision ran from near her ear to her chin. It was done about 4 years ago (when she was 84 years old) and there is no evidence of its removal at all.

 

[DeniseM]

Another perspective: I teach high school and I see teenagers absolutely obsessing over small flaws that they think are just the worst thing in the world. Things that other people don't even notice. Then they grow up a little, and develop a little more self-esteem and maturity, and the small flaw becomes a non-issue.

My own son, just turned 20, but still immature, hasn't worn shorts for the last couple of years, because he didn't think his body was "built" enough. He took a weight lifting class this summer and now he's wearing shorts. Has his body changed? No, not that I can see, but his self-esteem has.

So my question is, are these moles really unusual or disfiguring or is it something that is bothering your son now, at a sensitive age, but really isn't anything unusual or unattractive? Maybe they are - I don't know, I'm just asking. Almost everyone has moles, even on their face. I have several and so does my 24 year old daughter (who is quite pretty if I say so myself) and we never saw them as flaws - they are just part of us.

*After posting this I remembered that I went through a phase when I was 13 where I wouldn't wear anything but long sleeves because I thought my arms were too hairy! I even shaved them once! Yikes!

 

[geekette]

I'm on the same basic thought plane as Denise.

I would be cautious in encouraging any youth to undergo surgery (however minor) to change their appearance. It's not necessarily the message you want to send. eventually we all have to accept the things we don't like about ourselves.

If there are problems with them, that's different.

Were he my child, I would tell him that when he's 21, he can have any procedure done he wants since he'll be paying for it.

 

[Keitht]

Having the moles treated/removed has the potential for being the thin end of the cosmetic surgery wedge. What if 6 months down the line he doesn't like his nose or some other feature? I understand that kids of his age can be sensitive about anything that they feel makes them 'different', but in all probability in a few months he will have forgotten all about it.

 

[janapur]

Though this may not be comforting to your son, I have to agree with the others here. I can certainly empathize, as I have two moles on the side of my face that I spent an entire puberty trying to hide with creative hairstyles. What's really funny is that my son has two beauty marks on his handsome face and I think he's gorgeous! Have you shown him photos of Brad Pitt, Ben Affleck, or Jake Gyllenhal to name a few?