Newlyweds flip a coin for their last name

[WVBaker]

I've never considered this as something a man would do. Gentlemen, would you even have thought to do this?


Heads or tails? Meet the Florida newlyweds who flipped a coin for their last name

"At the altar, the couple flipped a coin to determine which last name they'd share: His, "Conley," or hers, "Ward." Darcy's brother designed a brass coin engraved with their surnames and profiles. It landed on Ward."

"Some say Darcy "won." But Jeff's got a different perspective."

"You could say I won," he said, nonchalantly. "I was the one who received something new."

Heads or tails? Meet the Florida newlyweds who flipped a coin for their last name

"You could say I won," he said, nonchalantly. "I was the one who received something new."

www.usatoday.com

Just in case you wondered.

The Name Change Process Varies by State

The process to change a name is legislated on a state basis. In California, you need to pay a court fee of more than $300, run a newspaper ad for several weeks, and go to court for a judge's approval. By comparison, for a California woman to change her last name to that of her husband, she can pay a smaller fee - between $50 and $80 depending on the county -and do the change right on the marriage license.

Many other states require steps and fees similar to those in California for men to change their names. In fact, only six states currently allow either partner to do a change a name under equal conditions when they marry. If you are a man looking to take your wife's name, count yourself lucky if you live in one of these enlightened states: Georgia, Hawaii, Iowa, Massachusetts, New York or North Dakota.

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[Cornell]

After my divorce I went back to my maiden name. HUGE hassle.

I have a teenaged daughter and my ex husband basically abandoned her. She hated having his name and thought she was "stuck" with it for the rest of her life. Once she told me this, I said "nope! We can change that". Hired a lawyer and petitioned for a name change , which was granted.

I'm not a vindictive person by nature but her changing her last name I'm sure was a major kick in the $%$ to my ex-husband. Schadenfreude.

 

[DaveNV]

We kept our own last names. Works well for us.

Dave

 

[amycurl]

Assuming that a woman will change her last name upon marriage is a traditional indication of patriarchy in any society. I didn't change my last name when I married; my spouse never even considered it an option: "What are you? My sister?" (This is just one reason he was the man for me!) I was surprised by how my MIL reacted; I think she saw it as some kind of critique of her choice (it wasn't in any way.) My mom and I have the same last name--of her ex-husband/my father, with whom I am not particularly close. I would have been happy if we had both switched back to her maiden name, a family that I much more identify with.

I have known couples to take each other's last name (swap.) I have known couples to create entirely new last names. Really, it's all about individual choice and what makes sense logistically, financially, and professionally.

My daughter has my husband's last name, because I had no interest in passing along my father's.

 

[Talent312]

DW #1 kept her last name... She was a 5th generation local.

DW #2 married me so she could change from 4 syllables to one.
It was like going from "Fruefenheimer" to "Lake" (fictional).

 

[Rolltydr]

I would consider it if my wife really wanted it but I no longer understand why anyone has to change their name. It is a hassle and it doesn’t serve any purpose as far as I can tell. IMHO it is a tradition that has run it’s course.


Harry - Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

[am1]

I would not change my last name and hope my sons do not either. I guess there are all kinds of people. We even lent our last name to a beach on the Pacific Ocean.

 

[klpca]

My daughter was on the fence about changing her name. She thought that she would try the new (married) name on her facebook account to see how she felt about it. Somehow she couldn't easily change it back so decided to just keep her new name for legal purposes too. That's one way to do it, lol.

I happily changed from a long-multi-syllable-difficult-to-pronounce name to a short name. Easy decision. Plus it makes me very happy to be part of my in-laws family.

 

[bogey21]

I've been divorced twice. In both cases my ex-wives kept my last name until they remarried. But get this. Both of them now use my last name as their Middle Name...

George

 

[Luanne]

When I was divorced I went back to my maiden name. I don't remember it being a huge deal, the "legal" part was done as part of the divorce. My ex made the comment that I must hate him if I wanted to get rid of his name. Not really, I just had had my maiden name longer. When I re-married I took my dh's name.

When older dd got married she and her then fiance were trying to decide what to do. He made a comment, and what I thought I heard was "We should pick a name we both don't like and us that". What he'd obviously said was to pick a name they both liked. But, we all got a laugh out of what I thought I heard. Ended up dd kept her maiden name.

Daughter of one of my best friend's and her husband ended up combing their names. He was Galen and she was Scaletti, they became Galetti.

 

[turkel]

Call me old fashioned I remarried 2 years ago and took my new husbands name. A pain, yes but we are a team and sharing his last name means something to me.
Not a fan of hyphenated names.
To each his own.

 

[clifffaith]

Cliff and I married when I was 29. I liked my Irish last name, so I kept it. Wasn't a big deal, except I still have a hard time remembering which name I used for a dinner reservation. Cats have Cliff's last name, if for no other reason than they give a 5% discount to senior citizens.

 

[Talent312]

... I still have a hard time remembering which name I used for a dinner reservation...

I'm often asked for my name when waiting on a table (or an order at a counter).
I've considered saying something made-up, like Jose Cuervo or Jim Beam.
But I'm afraid I won't remember when they call out, "Table for..."



.

 

[VacationForever]

In my culture, women just never change their surnames when they get married. The good thing is that my husband who grew up with the tradition of women changing their surnames, thinks it is wrong to even change a woman's surname to the husband's name. Never an issue.

The greatest irritant is that when we go to timeshare presentation, they address us as Mr. and Mrs (my surname) and we have to tell them that he sure isn't Mr. (my surname).

 

[Eric B]

We kept our own last names. Works well for us.

Dave

So did we. First ones, too. Works great.

The greatest irritant is that when we go to timeshare presentation, they address us as Mr. and Mrs (my surname) and we have to tell them that he sure isn't Mr. (my surname).

Similar issue, though probably more typical; they address my wife as Mrs B. We generally wind up telling them that would be my mom and my wife is Dr. M.

 

[Sandi Bo]

My oldest daughter is a doctor and kept our name. My husband loves that as there is a Dr. Bo (not real last name, lol). She didn't want to go through the hassle of changing it, she was just getting out of med school. However, now that she has kids she is torn. She said having a different last name than her husband was fine, but bugs her not to have same last name as her kids. She often uses his when it's just easier to do so (like at the kids school, introducing herself to other parents).

My other daughter struggled with changing her name. But her husband said no way. He is old school (and I love him for so many reasons for that) and it's just the way things should be. She did change her middle name to our surname.

I made a huge mess of my name, deciding for my 40's crisis I wished I'd made my surname my middle name. So I did it when I turned 40. Ugggg. I can't answer a simple question like what's your middle initial.

 

[rapmarks]

My oldest grandson was bothered by the fact his mother had a different last name, so she changed it. I thought that the kids names should be hyphenated or ours!
I took my husband’s name rather than my hard to pronounce name. Oh goodness, if I hadn’t my mother in law would have really had a fit. It was bad enough, I had Italian heritage (did I know how to speak English?), was catholic (how many wishes would she get when she went in my church) and I made more money than him,( that was just terrible. ).

 

[Grammarhero]

We both kept our last names. I’m not sure a coin flip is the right way to solve major issues.

 

[Eric B]

We both kept our last names. I’m not sure a coin flip is the right way to solve major issues.

If you're not sure, maybe a coin flip would be the way to go to decide....

 

[DaveNV]

I grew up in a mixed up household, with kids and step kids and whatever, where it seemed everyone had a different last name. My Mom married frequently (at least six husbands, and many live-in boyfriends, although only one at a time), so her name was always changing. It was always a random question about who was the father, and such. It was our "normal," so never truly mattered to us. We knew the truth of it. With the four core kids (not counting the transient step-siblings), my older half-siblings had a different last name than my younger sibling and I, (although it turns out we four each had a different biological father), but our collective grandparents treated all of us equally. We were all "family," and it all came down to a house filled with love.

As an adult, it's still that way. Having a different last name than my spouse doesn't really matter to us. We continue that tradition of "a house filled with love" attitude, where everyone is welcome. Doesn't matter what your name is, or your marital status. Just be kind.

Dave

 

[WVBaker]

My oldest grandson was bothered by the fact his mother had a different last name, so she changed it. I thought that the kids names should be hyphenated or ours!
I took my husband’s name rather than my hard to pronounce name. Oh goodness, if I hadn’t my mother in law would have really had a fit. It was bad enough, I had Italian heritage (did I know how to speak English?), was catholic (how many wishes would she get when she went in my church) and I made more money than him,( that was just terrible. ).

eri una brava moglie

 

[Timeshare Von]

When I divorced hubby #1 the judge at the final hearing sorta hassled me about not taking my maiden name back as part of the divorce proceeding/judgement. We had no kids, so he just couldn't figure out why I wouldn't want to change back. I explained that yes, while we had no children, in my current profession and in a relatively new location, people only knew me as "Shaw" and I didn't want to have to do the name change back to "Tison" and then change again at some point in the future, in the event that I remarry (which I did five years later).

Name changes are a PITA and I would have stayed my former married name forever had I not gotten married again.

 

[pittle]

When we got married in 1968, it was the custom for the wife to take the husband's last name. I did, but also converted my surname to my middle name. It did not cost anything. Actually, it was done with the SSA when I requested a new card. The only 2 things that I have without my "new" name are my birth certificate and college diploma. Both our daughter-in-laws chose to take our last name.

 

[jehb2]

We combined our names. I just assumed I would take my husband’s last name but he suggested we combine our names with a space in between, not a hyphen. Government agencies (ssn, passport, drivers license) had no problem with the name change.

We were in graduate school and changing my name with the university was easy. The receptionist just typed in my new name and didn’t ask for any documentation. she was very excited to hear about my wedding and asked about my colors, flowers, dress, and honeymoon. However when my husband went in to change his name she refused to do it. She said it wasn’t proper. I finally had to go back with him. She carefully examined all his documentation. She still wasn’t happy.

 

[VacationForever]

I know a couple, husband is Japanese and wife is Chinese. They combined their surnames, her surname first hyphenated with his as second.