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Finding a new job after 50

Zac495

Zac495

TUG Member
Joined
Jun 6, 2005
Messages
3,108
Reaction score
105
Location
Philadelphia, PA
DH lost his job - he's in HR and training.
He's been looking for 4 months - quite a few interviews. This is why I've been pretty absent from the boards.

He'd be mad I was writing about it, but at this point I really thought it was the right thing to do for 2 reasons (and he won't know anyway)

1 - Anyone with any ideas or leads in the PA (Philadelphia) area - even if you are on linked in and connected with a place that might be in the area somehow - if you would pm me, I'll give you his name and have him "friend" you on linked in.

2 - How do I keep from losing my mind as the soul bread winner right now?

THANKS friends.
Ellen
 
Ellen

So sorry to hear this. I can't help other than to say hang in there. DH went through this a number of years ago and it is so hard on him to get all the rejection letters and no offers after interviews. Hang in there, the right match will come up and it may be even better than what he was doing before.

You seem like an optimistic type of person and that is very important to stay that way to hold things together, it is easy to get pulled into the negitivity and depression that he may go through.

my DH even went through a period when he felt we would be better off collecting the insurance money and he attempted suicide, fortunately he was not sucessful. Now 10 years later, life is soooo much better...

Hang in there....((hugs))
 
Ellen,
Just want to give you a virtual hug from Iowa. Have no advice regarding job hunting but want to remind you to take care of yourself and treasure your awesome family. Having a job crisis myself at the moment and keep telling myself as long as my kids are ok everything will be fine! Chocolate and red wine seem to help as well.

I always try to exercise my way through stress....walking and talking with a friend is a great way to get a little dose of cheap therapy:)
Have a fantastic Mother's Day Ellen!

Sue
 
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Starting your own business or consulting are two areas where age can be a benefit.

Maybe he can look in other cities.

Best of luck.
 
At his age, everyone thinks their life is pretty fixed and the path does not or will not change. And after almost 30 years of employment, a sudden and unplanned termination of his employment is a major ripple.

There are many daytime support groups in the PHL area for people in his situation. A daily routine and social links are important for everyone, but men tend to be more isolated after employment ends. His former co-workers will NOT be calling or including him in golf or other social events. There success record is MUCH higher than those going solo - but most employed only go to practice interviewing skills, resume writing classes, and cheerleading the others after floundering for months or years - unemployed or under-employed.

Suggest he join a gym - not the one near his former worksite - going during the early AM hours or evening hours when the working population will also be there.

Volunteer where the retired do (not where the unemployed are networking) - after all they still have some contacts in workplaces (Boy Scouts, SBA, Habitat for Humanity, Red Cross, Little League, etc).

Work for an (professional) temp agency in ANY type or length of job.

So, he should get up and OUT of the house on a set (working person's) schedule. Dress for work as you never know who you are talking to. Get a good haircut and DYE the grey out .... lose those love handles .... clean out the closet of "old" ties, shirts, colors, bad shoes and suits. Wash & wax the car; clean out the trunk and back seat.

It is amazing how a job happens when you are not begging or looking or whinning or mope'ing or acting desperate.
 
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am1 said:
Starting your own business or consulting are two areas where age can be a benefit.

Maybe he can look in other cities.

Best of luck.
Click to expand...

If something like that happened to me, I think I'd be looking at something in this direction. Even pulling retirement funds to make it work. However, the risk is huge.

Good luck to the OP in their situation.
 
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Thanks for the responses so far. The chocolate is a good idea, Sue, but I prefer white wine. I’ve been running a lot – and he has too.

I did make him dye his hair and we are now talking of just this , Linda, going out and helping those in need. Oh - and he lost 20 pounds from stress so there are no love handles. I like the idea of cleaning the car - my car too! It’s true no one is calling him. He sits in the house all day applying for jobs.

We talked about a business but with 4 kids for me to support (his ex has been on welfare for years so I take care of his two kids as well as ours) we can't risk it - 2 in college - 2 more coming up.
Chellij – wow – so glad your husband is okay.
Siesta – He’s even applied to grocery stores and been turned down. Very frustrating but he’s not giving up.
I really hope one of these jobs comes through - he has two on the line ... but I don't want to set myself up for another fall like after the last few great interviews and then rejections.

I really appreciate the posts so much.
Ellen
 
Zac495 said:
....I did make him dye his hair and we are now talking of just this , Linda, going out and helping those in need. Oh - and he lost 20 pounds from stress so there are no love handles. I like the idea of cleaning the car - my car too! It’s true no one is calling him. He sits in the house all day applying for jobs....
Click to expand...

Stress is NOT good for job hunting. The gym and a regular exercise routine is an antidote for depression. Even working out in the yard will add sunlight and color to his skin - also good to combat depression. A regular routine (by NOT sitting in the house) is what he has done for years while having a job.

I have had MANY friends who retired - happy to retire, but after sleeping in for several months, eating at irregular hours, eating bad food, surfing the web for hours, etc ---- they also became depressed.

One joined a gym to do water arobitics with the arthrisis sufferers (like himself), one does weekly volunteer work at the Boy Scout camp (and volunteers all summer 24-7 at the camp), play too much golf, a GF who decided to remodel her home (IMHO, poorly - I said nothing), and one got into watching "IMUS in the Morning" in his PJs (I had to do an intervention on that one) --- he went back to work. Another goes to breakfast at a different diner. The ones with spouses - there is a long period of adjustment, too.
 
I'm unemployed right now too.....

When I lost my job a year ago I went back to school (yes, it is costing us!) but I have 3 more classes till I have a liberal arts degree.

I also started volunteering; and I hope to eventually work my volunteer work at the school into a job. I am in the elementary school four mornings a week...for just an hour after I drop my middle school kids off at their school.

I really like working with the kids and it gets me out of the house...meeting and talking to people every day (I haven't said anything about a job yet - I want to finish my degree) but I'll know lots of people by then.

A few years ago when we first moved here and I was looking for work I was VERY fustrated after months of interviews (which I thought were going well) BUT I never received a job offer - finally I decided to make sure I got the name and phone number of the main interviewer and follow up with a personal phone call if I didn't get the job - I was VERY clear that I wasn't upset or angry......I told them that I understood that I obviously was NOT the right candidate for this particular job but that I would appreciate any input as to my interview style, etc - how might I improve my eligibility for a future position....not only with their company but with ANY company? I asked about my resume....but since my resume had gotten me an interview....it must have been ok....so there was something about the way I came across....I asked how I could improve; it was very enlightening and the people I called were very receptive and helpful (in most cases they felt I was overqualified and wouldn't be satisfied or fit in with the other employees).

The first month I started making these phone calls I went on three interviews - I followed up and actually accepted one of the jobs by convincing the supervisor I was NOT overqualified and WANTED to be a receptionist. With the other two jobs both managers called me back within the month with OTHER jobs they thought I would be better suited for!

I wish you good luck -
 
vacationhopeful said:
Work for an (professional) temp agency in ANY type or length of job.
Click to expand...

Fortunately, I was able to retire before the job market changed so dramatically, but if I were in my 50s, qualified, and out of work, I would seriously consider the (professional) temp agency route. Advantages as I see it are current income and exposure.

I recall that a high level guy I had to lay off years ago, because we had fazed out his operation, did this and eventually ended up doing very well.

George
 
Has he considered substitute teaching? I don't know about your state, but in CA you only have to have a BA to substitute - not a teaching credential. It could be a good interim career for him and it pays a lot more than most temp jobs. If he has math or science skills, he could be quite popular, because it's hard to find Subs who have the background to teach those classes.
 
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More ideas!

As an employment discrimination lawyer, I unfortunately see this often. Sometimes it really is a layoff and unfortunately sometimes it is age discrimination. If he feels he has been the victim of age discrimination, he has 300 days to file a claim with the local office of the EEOC (www.EEOC.gov). If he wants to look for an age discrimination lawyer he can look for one at: (www.nela.org). Most give a free or inexpensive initial consultation.

I have had one client who had been an HR professional and it took her two to three years of constantly applying in HR and nothing ever came up. She eventually chose a new profession. I represented another HR trainer and he never got his job back either and ended up a hotel concierege which he loves but at lesser pay. Both were "seniors" and were victims of age discrimination.

Unfortunately, your husband's area of expertise is in soft skills that are not that much in demand and there are a ton of applications for each and every HR or trainer position.

A couple of suggestions:

1. Re looking for a job - hook up with a church sponsored job search group or a large group - 25 or more people - as that will give him a new peer group and help expand his contacts.

2. Go back to school right now and get his teaching certificate - most districts would snap up a male - and senior male all the better although I hardly consider 50 to be senior. He would be in demand especially at the junior high and high school level and especially in math and science but I suspect any speciality would do. Substitute teaching is a suggestion but not as good as getting a teaching certificate. Some districts do have a stepping stone type of program or an accellerated program to get your certificate from another field if you have a bachelor's degree already. It may take one year or less to get a teaching certificate.

3. If he likes kids and thinks he would like teaching this could be a new lease on life.

4. Get a masters degree in renewable energy resources - there should be a lot of jobs opening up there - I have a friend's husband who was unemployed for almost three years but who finally landed a job - and he is now just two classes away from an MBA in renewable energy resources which he started during his period of unemployment. While an almost three year search sounds dreadful, he just landed a job in solar energy sales management. His prior area of expertise had been managing computer chip salespeople.

My most important suggestion - take action now for retraining. Best of luck. Janette aka "Funtime"
 
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Many great ideas above. A friend in his late 50s, very qualified in computing and banking fields, was getting unemployment. I suggested a temp agency and soon he found himself working for one of the big medical insurance companies fixing computer issues. After about a year of that, knowing the company was paying the temp agency a lot more than he was getting, he talked the company into hiring him directly. (I guess the company paid something to the temp agency to deal with a non-compete clause or something like that.) Anyway, he held that job for years, 5-8 I guess.
 
FWIW - it's not as difficult now to find a new job now that most companies are using defined contribution retirement plans instead of defined benefit plans. That change took out a huge disincentive to hiring older workers.

In my world of environmental consulting, it's far easier for an experienced person to get hired than it used to be. Fifteen to twenty years ago hardly anyone over 50 got hired unless they were able to bring with them enough work to cover their own salary plus at least two or three other people. IOW - they weren't that interested in gray hairs as general technical staff. At my age (62) and with my experience, I could pick up a staff engineer position if I wanted one.
 
pjrose said:
After about a year of that, knowing the company was paying the temp agency a lot more than he was getting, he talked the company into hiring him directly. (I guess the company paid something to the temp agency to deal with a non-compete clause or something like that.)
Click to expand...

Many (most?) temp agencies also have a recruiting business for permanent hires. And if they have both, they generally have a plan called temp-to-hire, or temp-to-perm. The contract that the employer signs with the agency to hire the temp generally has a clause that says that if they want to hire the person permanently, here are our fees, usually with a sliding scale. IOW, the more the employer has already paid in temp fees, the less they'll have to pay in recruiting fees for the permanent hire. Your hubby's company probably exercised that clause, possibly after renegotiating the fee schedule.

HTH,
Bob
(DW & I used to own a minority interest in a temp agency.)
 
Last week, some colleagues and I discussed another's layoff & new job w-us.
I said, "They did him a favor. It shows that when one door closes, another opens."

A cynic replied, "Yes... To the 10th level of hell." -- referring to our jobs.

I guess the message is, don't be too proud to take something that may not be ideal.
 
Another idea...

Over the years I've attended quite a few Fred Pryor and Career Track training sessions and I think they are always looking for independent training contractors. Ellen, your husband's professional background sounds like it would definitely lend itself to this. It would involve a lot of travel and some sales but it might be an option, at least for awhile. Their website is www.pryor.com. Good luck to you both!
 
I don't think teaching or subbing is that viable. Many schools have a sub list thisssssssssssssssssss long. They are cutting teaching staff as certain academic programs are phased out and class sizes are increased, great qualified teachers never get hired fulltime because they are such good subs, kids out of college are on the list, as are those without a teaching degree, so chances of regular work are NOT good unless your specialty is math or science, and then just maybe. And no one should be a teacher unless that is their passion.

Something good will happen soon for your DH. I just know it.
 
Patri said:
I don't think teaching or subbing is that viable. Many schools have a sub list thisssssssssssssssssss long. They are cutting teaching staff as certain academic programs are phased out and class sizes are increased, great qualified teachers never get hired fulltime because they are such good subs, kids out of college are on the list, as are those without a teaching degree, so chances of regular work are NOT good unless your specialty is math or science, and then just maybe. And no one should be a teacher unless that is their passion.

Something good will happen soon for your DH. I just know it.
Click to expand...

I don't know about other states, but this isn't true in CA - my district runs short of subs every day.
 
Dear Zac495:

I am very sorry to hear about your recent misfortunes. Bad things do happen to good people. It is very easy to become discouraged. Be strong, Be strong, and let us strengthen each other. G-d bless you and your family.
 
Thanks

I started reading these responses (still didn't mention it was on tug personally) and he just said he can't handle anything - he has to do this and that today. He's so depressed.

Thanks for the websites - we are going to try that. We are also going to try to find out if he can substitute. He actually has his BA in education, but has never taught school - so we'll find out if he can sub.

I like the idea of him going after a teaching job.

He's depressed, but your messages are making me feel more optimistic which will (I hope ) rub off on him. You guys are the best.
 
Ellen,
Has he filed for a reduction on this child support payments? In my state, the ONLY income to calculate that is the father's - not the new wife's income.

Sorry, if that seems mean -- but if he has very limited money, then he can give it all (plus your money) to the ex-wife. The retroactive date (in my state) to recalculate is the DATE OF FILING. That is something HE (and you) MUST DO today.
 
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