TUG MEMBERS: Joining TUG does not automatically register you as a user of the TUG Bulletin Board. You must register yourself.


*ads are disabled when logged in as a member*
  1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. The TUGBBS forums are completely free and open to the public and exist as the absolute best place for owners to get help and advice about their timeshares for more than 25 years!

    Join tens of thousands of other owners just like you here to get any and all Timeshare questions answered!
    Dismiss Notice
  3. TUG has now saved timeshare owners more than $12,000,000 dollars just by finding us in time to rescind a new Timeshare purchase! A truly incredible milestone!

    Read more here: TUG saves owners more than $12Million dollars
    Dismiss Notice
  4. Sign up to get the TUG Newsletter for free! Join tens of thousands of other owners who get this every week! Latest resort reviews and the most important topics discussed by owners during the week!
    Dismiss Notice
  5. TUG is trying out a new program that will trade you a TUG membership for a Timeshare resort review if you are an expired member, or even just a guest here on the forums!

    Read more here
    Dismiss Notice
  6. Our official "end my sales presentation early" T-shirts are available again! Also come with the option for a free membership extension with purchase to offset the cost!

    Read more Here
    Dismiss Notice
  7. Follow the TUG Member Banner as it travels the world on vacation with Timeshare owners! Also sign up to get the banner sent to you so you can submit a photo of your vacation with the banner to share with TUG! Banner Thread
    Dismiss Notice
  8. TUG has now joined Priceline.com as an affiliate!

    Members and guests who book air travel, rental cars and even Cruise Vacations thru TUG's priceline links will now support TUG in the process!

    Read more here
  9. A few of the most common links here on the forums for newbies and guests!
    Dismiss Notice

Woman seeks to change law after discovering truth about her genetic family tree

Discussion in 'TUG Lounge' started by MULTIZ321, May 4, 2019.

  1. MULTIZ321

    MULTIZ321 TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    16,512
    Likes Received:
    2,158
    Trophy Points:
    598
    Location:
    FT. LAUDERDALE, FL
    Resorts Owned:
    BLUEWATER BY SPINNAKER HHI
    ROYAL HOLIDAY CLUB RHC (POINTS)
  2. mdurette

    mdurette Sighting Expert & TUG Review Crew: Veteran TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2008
    Messages:
    3,158
    Likes Received:
    1,283
    Trophy Points:
    398
    Location:
    New England
    What a crazy story.

    I was chatting with a customer of mine a while back and she relayed a story about a friend.
    Friend (in her 80s) did a test and found out she had a sister (also in her 80s). It appeared her mother had a fling when her father was in the military and gave the baby up for adoption. I didn't know if it was even possible for matches like this to come from a DNA test and this customer wasn't all there anyway....so I wasn't sure if I could believe the story.

    I know this is off beat/not official - but on a recent episode of Law and Order SVU - one detective took a DNA sample from a perp and sent it in with a fake name to find a familiar match to catch the bad guy. I know this is TV...but it got me thinking about the possibility of usage far more than to just find out who your ancestors are.

    Either way.....the 2 tests my DH and I received as gifts several years ago are still sitting in a drawer in my office. For me at least, some things are better off left unknown.
     
    mpumilia and klpca like this.
  3. Sandy VDH

    Sandy VDH TUG Review Crew: Elite TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    6,804
    Likes Received:
    1,331
    Trophy Points:
    448
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    Resorts Owned:
    Wynd VIP Plat, HGVC Elite, HICV, + few others
    Even if people do, the DNA does not lie. Many family secrets, known and unknown could be discovered.
     
  4. PeterS

    PeterS TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    231
    Likes Received:
    31
    Trophy Points:
    238
    That is the way they found the Golden State Killer last year. I believe the police couldn't get permission to access DNA records so they sent it in with a fake name, got a match of a relative, and tracked him down from there.

    So it isn't just TV anymore....
    Amazing how many people just give up their DNA records (or pay to do it)...
    Like the attached story....
    You have to realize if you dig into your background, you risk your current life.... for what?
     
    wackymother and mpumilia like this.
  5. Glynda

    Glynda TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2005
    Messages:
    2,469
    Likes Received:
    809
    Trophy Points:
    324
    Location:
    Charleston, SC
    Resorts Owned:
    Bluegreen Points Lodge Alley Inn.
    Brewster Green (two weeks).
    For what? To have and know your own identity. Where you came from. I have nothing to hide in my "current life." If police discover that a relative of mine has broken the law, more power to them!
     
    Panina likes this.
  6. DaveNW

    DaveNW TUG Review Crew: Expert TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 1, 2006
    Messages:
    11,390
    Likes Received:
    4,489
    Trophy Points:
    548
    Location:
    North of Seattle
    Resorts Owned:
    WorldMark
    My sister was born out of wedlock back in the 40's, and was later adopted by my mother's first husband, who was killed in a tragic accident about a year later. Our Mother has been deceased for more than 20 years, and she gave up few secrets about her life in those days. My sister has absolutely no idea about who her birth father's family is, or what sort of medical history they may have. She has always wanted to know. Ancestry testing might give her some answers, but she's decided at this point in her life, it wouldn't much matter. I wish she had known decades ago, so she may have had a more full family life. Hiding the truth of human social failings have long-reaching effects.

    Dave
     
  7. VacationForever

    VacationForever Tug Review Crew: Rookie TUG Member

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2010
    Messages:
    9,214
    Likes Received:
    3,128
    Trophy Points:
    398
    Location:
    Somewhere Out There
    I know enough about both sides of the family and undergoing DNA testing won't tell me anything about family roots. However on the medical side, it is good to know what sort of illnesses and diseases we may be susceptible to. Up to this point in life, not one person whom we know that is genetically linked to us on both sides of the family has had cancer. We are talking about all uncles, aunts, grand uncles and cousins. I am keeping my fingers crossed that maybe we will luck out too.
     
    Last edited: May 4, 2019
    klpca, Panina and mpumilia like this.
  8. Iggyearl

    Iggyearl TUG Member

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2014
    Messages:
    395
    Likes Received:
    270
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Location:
    Ballston Lake, NY
    My mother told me many stories of relatives and property in Norwalk, CT. I never listened. Now I am tracing my genealogy from my Ancestry test and am wishing I had listened. Our parents die too young.... I feel sorry for the "sperm donor" children who can now go through genetic testing. Like this lady, they are in for a multitude of surprises - not all good. Who knew then that some day you would be able to spit in to a vial and have your previous ancestors exposed on your genetic tree. It is both amazing and scary. I have no intention of testing for medical issues. Ancestors are good enough. ;)
     
  9. bogey21

    bogey21 TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2005
    Messages:
    6,716
    Likes Received:
    1,434
    Trophy Points:
    449
    Location:
    Fort Worth, Texas
    If you start digging, there is a chance you may find out things you don't want to know...

    George
     
  10. b2bailey

    b2bailey TUG Member

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2007
    Messages:
    1,590
    Likes Received:
    440
    Trophy Points:
    293
    Location:
    Santa Cruz CA
    I can't imagine the emotional toll, especially after establishing a relationship with the man she thought was her biological father. On the bright side -- she hit the jackpot with good looks!
     
    clifffaith and DaveNW like this.
  11. am1

    am1 TUG Member

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2009
    Messages:
    5,576
    Likes Received:
    502
    Trophy Points:
    298
    Your right about the jackpot pot but I would think any situation like this would warrant a dna test when possible.

    In 2019 I would make dna testing mandatory across the board. Especially for unwed “parents” but safer if it’s for everyone.
     
  12. VacationForever

    VacationForever Tug Review Crew: Rookie TUG Member

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2010
    Messages:
    9,214
    Likes Received:
    3,128
    Trophy Points:
    398
    Location:
    Somewhere Out There
    That will be the 2019 version of the previous version where the couple had to have a blood test taken before they could wed to rule out potential compatibility issues.
     
  13. PeterS

    PeterS TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    231
    Likes Received:
    31
    Trophy Points:
    238
    It is not a matter of protecting someone who has broken the law.... that was just to show it is being used that way even though they didn't tell you they were going to use your info that way.

    I was referring to the original quoted article... alot of people who had their lives turned upside down.
    For What? It was horrific! Are they better off with the info... Are they happier? Did it improve their lives? Reread the article...

    What if you found out the people who raised you weren't your actual parents.
    How would you feel about it? How would THEY feel?

    Your identity is what YOU have made of your life... your place in the world NOW.
    You can't change the past.... what is there to gain?

    Exactly my point....
     
    PigsDad, mdurette and rapmarks like this.
  14. am1

    am1 TUG Member

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2009
    Messages:
    5,576
    Likes Received:
    502
    Trophy Points:
    298
    I feel people deserve to know for better or worse. No more allowing people to hide from what they have done. Also legally a man can hardly be sure they are the father. There are stories where a man pays child support for many years all because the mother lied. In Canada they are required to keep paying even if it is established they are not the father. DNA tests at birth can eliminate that.
     
    Glynda likes this.
  15. rapmarks

    rapmarks TUG Review Crew: Elite TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    5,732
    Likes Received:
    1,026
    Trophy Points:
    449
    My children did dna tests, turned out to be what we knew, German, English, broadly Northern European from father and Italian and broadly Southern European from me. My sisters daughter did it, 2 percent Italian. My sister is definitely my sister, she looks like many people in the family, I remember when she was born, I remember my mother being pregnant, the results can not be true.
     
  16. Talent312

    Talent312 Tug Review Crew: Rookie TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2007
    Messages:
    12,277
    Likes Received:
    2,131
    Trophy Points:
    548
    Location:
    North Florida
    Resorts Owned:
    HGVC x2 and Gatlinburg Town Square
    I like comedian Louie Anderson's bit:
    I sent my DNA off for testing.
    The results said I was 20% Norwegian...
    and 80% butter.
    .
     
    Glynda, LisaH and DrQ like this.
  17. DaveNW

    DaveNW TUG Review Crew: Expert TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 1, 2006
    Messages:
    11,390
    Likes Received:
    4,489
    Trophy Points:
    548
    Location:
    North of Seattle
    Resorts Owned:
    WorldMark
    Or Rodney Dangerfeld: "In my family tree, I'm the sap." :)

    Dave
     
    Glynda, LisaH, DrQ and 1 other person like this.
  18. rapmarks

    rapmarks TUG Review Crew: Elite TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    5,732
    Likes Received:
    1,026
    Trophy Points:
    449
    We have found out things we didn’t want to know and there a slew of supposed relatives that no one in the family has ever heard of (and they have done extensive genealogy)
     
  19. Sandy VDH

    Sandy VDH TUG Review Crew: Elite TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    6,804
    Likes Received:
    1,331
    Trophy Points:
    448
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    Resorts Owned:
    Wynd VIP Plat, HGVC Elite, HICV, + few others
    I have a family tree published in a book for my father side, tree goes back to 1422. On my mom's side I have the research, although not published in a book, I still have it. It goes back to 1701. Both sides of my family were born in Netherlands and lived in the same area for many generations. Generally the records were located back as far as the church fire that destroyed them, luckily for use that was quite far back.

    Anything that I don't know, I don't think I want to know.

    If I have no idea and my background was a hodgepodge mess, I might be interested. But I am 100% Dutch. I look like my relatives, so I am pretty sure I known what I need to know.
     
  20. Panina

    Panina TUG Review Crew: Elite TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2015
    Messages:
    3,864
    Likes Received:
    4,137
    Trophy Points:
    298
    Location:
    USA
    Resorts Owned:
    Hgvc Eagles Nest, Hgvc Surf Club, Hgvc Indian River, Hgvc Anderson, Sunrise Bay & Club, Chetola, Gulf Tides, Jade Tree Cove, Banyan Resort, Blue Ridge Village
    I think I want to know no matter what happens. Thinking seriously of doing one of the tests.

    Whatever the results, it doesn’t change who I am.
     
    jhac007, CanuckTravlr and Glynda like this.
  21. vacationhopeful

    vacationhopeful TUG Review Crew: Rookie TUG Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2007
    Messages:
    12,670
    Likes Received:
    1,555
    Trophy Points:
    498
    Location:
    Northeast USA
    I am 10th generation NJ-ite on my Father's family home was built in 1702 ... and still owned by my elderly aunt. Grew up across that family home. About 10 miles from where I live now (but I have the key and security code to that house).

    My Mother was 1st geneation US born of immigrated Dutch parents (one from the Southern part of Holland and the other from the Northern part of Holland). She grew up in Wisconsin.

    My parents met and married in Toyko,Japan during the US occupying years after WWII.

    Have NO interest in doing a DNA test ... as do any of my siblings.
     
  22. Glynda

    Glynda TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2005
    Messages:
    2,469
    Likes Received:
    809
    Trophy Points:
    324
    Location:
    Charleston, SC
    Resorts Owned:
    Bluegreen Points Lodge Alley Inn.
    Brewster Green (two weeks).
    Absolutely. That's the risk you take. I suspect all families have skeletons in the closet. I've certainly learned of some as I seek birth family information. I'm after knowledge, regardless of whether I like it or not.
     
    Panina and jhac007 like this.
  23. Glynda

    Glynda TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2005
    Messages:
    2,469
    Likes Received:
    809
    Trophy Points:
    324
    Location:
    Charleston, SC
    Resorts Owned:
    Bluegreen Points Lodge Alley Inn.
    Brewster Green (two weeks).
    "They" didn't use the information that way. The police falsified an account to upload data from crime scenes to GEDMatch, a free place to upload one's DNA data from other testing sites. A site where privacy is not protected and open-access to matches is available to account holders and may be used in other ways. When I signed up for Gedmatch, I had to acknowledge that I understood that and agreed.

    I read the article. All of it. In a manner, I've lived, am living, the article! The people who raised me weren't my actual parents. My life was turned "upside down" from the age of nine and again and again as I've learned more. I have recently learned that the man whom I have believed for the past 45 years to be my biological father, though I never met him because he died one month prior to my finding him, is not my biological father. I was rather fond of the idea of his having been my birthfather. I have had interaction with his stepson whom he raised. I've spent many hours pouring over his photos, building his family tree, etc. Still, I believe those in the article, and I, are/am better off with the information. Is my life improved? Yes. I am not living a lie. Knowledge is power and happiness isn't always based on what we think it is. I only have two regrets. That I didn't know sooner and that I still do not have all the answers.

    My identity is not entirely what I have made of my life. My "place in the world" has been built upon a foundation which is both genetical and sociological! No, I can't change the past but I can gain from, and build upon, the knowledge of it.

    Forgive me if I am wrong, but I can't help but wonder if you are so passionate about this because there is a skeleton in your closet that you don't want to come to life.
     
    jhac007 and wackymother like this.
  24. Glynda

    Glynda TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2005
    Messages:
    2,469
    Likes Received:
    809
    Trophy Points:
    324
    Location:
    Charleston, SC
    Resorts Owned:
    Bluegreen Points Lodge Alley Inn.
    Brewster Green (two weeks).
    I may be missing something, but I don't understand. What results can not be true? It's entirely possible for full siblings to get different ancestry prediction results from their DNA tests. Only identical twins get the exact same mix. My husband is a fraternal twin. His twin sister has more German DNA than he. He has more Irish DNA than she. He has a small amount of Asian DNA. His twin has none. Your sister's child would have a a father's DNA to take into account in the mix also.
     
    wackymother likes this.
  25. Sandy VDH

    Sandy VDH TUG Review Crew: Elite TUG Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2005
    Messages:
    6,804
    Likes Received:
    1,331
    Trophy Points:
    448
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    Resorts Owned:
    Wynd VIP Plat, HGVC Elite, HICV, + few others
    Sounds familiar......

    I am 1st generation Canadian born of immigrated Dutch parents (Dad from the Southern part of Holland and the Mom from the Northern part of Holland). My parents left in 1953. They met on ship crossing to Canada. I grew up in Ontario Canada.
     

Share This Page