I read your initial post this morning but could not respond then. In the meantime, you've had lots of good advise. However, my gut feeling upon reading that first post is that your heart is not really ready for this. You will know when it is. Wishing you the best of luck with whatever you choose to do.
I actually have come around to the reality of the situation. I got through some emotions and the fear that was strangling me and am now at the "Just Do It" phase.
I am trying to chill now for a little bit. I know once the house is listed and we start with doing the pre-inspection and dealing with all the issues and logistics that are involved, my stress level will go up. I will just have to get through it. At least we have vacations coming up! Yay!
I know that in order to move forward with our lives and to put ourselves in a better situation as we get older, divesting ourselves of this house has to happen. Might as well start the process now because there is a lot involved. Would have to do it sooner or later anyway.
If we had the money, this would not be stressful. We would just buy that little house we love in NH right now and put our current house up for sale later when my husband retires at the end of the year. But that is just not our reality. We know the chances of getting that little house are slim to none. But no matter what- we will be in the same situation over and over again if we do not sell this house first. So be it.
If the house doesn't sell this time around- well- we still have a house to live in and at least we would have gotten it prepared for a future sale through the inspection.
Hopefully, we will find a decent rental that is not too expensive.We are not used to paying like $2000-$3000 per month- our taxes here are $825 per month. We would be lucky to find something $1500 per month. This is going to involve taking money out of savings to make up for the difference each month and also to pay for a storage unit.
I have also been preparing for some time now to deal with the fact that it is possible we will not find another little house and community in NH that we want to live in. If that happens- another option would be Vermont- despite the tax hell hole that it is (amongst other things I won't get into here because they are political) but we do love the state- my favorite. The housing issue could be hard there also. At that point- we will proceed to PA or Delaware where there are a lot more options and tax friendly.
Then from there it will be throwing a dart on a map.
We might consider a state like Tennessee- Smokey Mountains- but never been there or any of the southern states except Florida and Virginia. Don't like intense heat and humidity or major tornadoes or hurricanes, reptiles or big bugs.
Worse comes to worse- there is out West- Nevada maybe, Colorado, Idaho-which we like also- most of the Western states- not too crazy about desert and intense heat though- just so far from our son and friends and family- even for the rare occasions we do get to see them- at least we can drive to see them.