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About To Lose My Job

DrQ

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Nothing is more satisfying than a narcissist on a short leash.
 

am1

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You may not be wrong but it depends what your other options are as far as getting paid and if you need that. Do not look at it as winning if you go back, even under your own terms as he will still benefit from you but think of it in terms of money or long term security. Most likely he cares nothing about you but only how you can benefit the company (him).

Given the opportunity I would throw out a crazy number at a minimum.

Thank you all, but as HitchHiker71 said- this guy is a narcissist. I have more self esteem than to subject myself to going back there after all I went through. What would that say about me?

The way I feel is the conversation would be over immediately after I spit in his face.
 

geekette

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Everyone has a price.

I don't think so.

There are some hellholes I would not revisit for quadruple salary. Life is too short to chase money over happiness. I won't accept fancy dollars to endure unbearable stress. Work is one aspect of life, I won't build my life around it.
 

geekette

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Thank you all, but as HitchHiker71 said- this guy is a narcissist. I have more self esteem than to subject myself to going back there after all I went through. What would that say about me?

The way I feel is the conversation would be over immediately after I spit in his face.
LOL

You go, Girl!! I LOVE IT.
 

WinniWoman

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One of my coworkers just told me he will not close early this year the day before Thanksgiving. Used to be "early" for this company was 5pm, which i still thought was ridiculous. Now he told the staff they are staying open until 9pm. This announced just one week before the holiday. I told her to call out but she took the day off already - lucky for her.

Right now it is snowing and I am so glad to not have to be driving in it today or tomorrow. Sitting by the fire with a glass of wine just waiting for my husband to get home from work and then all is well.:)
 
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Panina

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One of my coworkers just told me he will not close early this year the day before Thanksgiving. Used to be "early" for this company was 5pm, which i still thought was ridiculous. Now he told the staff they are staying open until 9pm. This announced just one week before the holiday. I told her to call out but she took the day off already - lucky for her.

Right now it is snowing and I am so glad to not have to be driving in it today or tomorrow. Sitting by the fie with a glass of wine just waiting for my husband to get home from work and then all is well.:)
Cheers you have your answer
 

vacationhopeful

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My sister called me a few minutes ago to invite me to her home for Thanksgiving.

Mary Ann .... Make and enjoy your plans for Thanksgiving 2018 ... the start of your NEW life without this employer's (NOT) helpfulness ... (Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Eve, Martin Lurther King, President's Weekend, Easter, Memorial Day, July 4th, Labor Day .. repeat again and again) ...... plans for you & your family & friends.
 

WinniWoman

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My sister called me a few minutes ago to invite me to her home for Thanksgiving.

Mary Ann .... Make and enjoy your plans for Thanksgiving 2018 ... the start of your NEW life without this employer's (NOT) helpfulness ... (Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Eve, Martin Lurther King, President's Weekend, Easter, Memorial Day, July 4th, Labor Day .. repeat again and again) ...... plans for you & your family & friends.


Awesome! Enjoy your sister and your whole family on the holiday!

My brother and his family are coming to our home from downstate and our son is coming down from NH- the only time he comes home during the year. So looking forward to it.

So- yes- I am planning to have a wonderful holiday! Thanks!
 

WinniWoman

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OK. Sorry to post again but I just had to share.

My cell phone rang today and i saw it was the number from my old job. I figured one of my ex-coworkers was calling to tell me something. I answer and it is- drum roll- the Sociopath boss!!

I was taken back. He started to say he was thinking about me and wondering how I was doing. (Umm- really? You suddenly care how I am doing?). I asked him what was up- why he was calling. He said he was just thinking about me at Thanksgiving being he was at his "crazy" mom's house and how I was the only one he ever opened up to about his mom. (OK- what the?!). He said he misses how we used to talk- I can't even remember everything he said but he was talking to me like he would have before he became the boss- like the guy I knew before all this. The innocent, little boy type personality. OMG!

I tell him I do not know what to say (when I really wanted to tell him to go- you know what). He again asks how I am. Said he misses having me at the job. I stay silent. I tell him I am on my way out to take my husband for his eye surgery. (which is not true- it is later today).

Again, I said hardly anything and he kept trying to make like he cared what I was up to. He asked if I was working- I said no, just chilling for now.

The woman whom he asked to contact me before said he came in and told her he didn't believe that she was sending me his messages so he asked for my cell number and she gave it to him.

Well isn't that just like a narcissist to not believe someone would not respond to his messages?

I eventually just said yes and goodbye after his numerous times telling me he was just wondering if I was ok.

You can't make this stuff up.
 

DaveNV

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I’m thinking less narcissist and more schizophrenic. At minimum, bipolar.

Dave
 

Fredflintstone

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What’s next? This dude parked out front your home equipped with night vision goggles and shades? My, my, my


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
 

Passepartout

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Reminds me of a drunk calling a former girlfriend hoping that the past has been forgotten. Don't answer that incoming number again. No good can come of it.

Jim
 

pedro47

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Just be careful and watch your back. Suggestion Only. Please keep notes every time he calls you and the subject matters. Something could be up. Just be careful.
 

VacationForever

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He has a crush on you and made it difficult for you while you were working there as that was the only way he could express his interest in you. LOL
 

WinniWoman

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I want to believe that he just had a moment of reckoning and realized how destructive his behavior had been to the business and relationship with his coworkers/subordinates, and wanted to make amends to you :)

Umm- no.
 

vacationhopeful

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"Restraining" and "NO CONTACT" orders from your Police Department serviced on HIM. ... that would be my "what is next" answer.

And then send copies of the police's NO CONTACT orders to corporate HR (directly from the police department if possible) or in an envelope from the police department. ie That is another "point of notice to him" that SOMEONE else might open.

I have dealth with all types of people in my day job. There is a reason I use ONLY a Post Office box .... (and not near the same town I live in). And I always check who is ringing my doorbell from another point in the house (not via the door peephole). I remind friends me to CALL before coming over or call me before getting out of their cars.

And NO, I do not carry. But I have been stalked my an ex-bf decades ago. I learned a LOT then.


PS My day job? Simple, I make people HOMELESS if they don't pay me. (Legally, thru the court state system.) And I am NOT lawyer.
 

Panina

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Just weird weird weird. If he had asked about you coming back to work or apologized for his behavior I would say the call was what it is. Nut job as you said all along. Best that you were pleasant and don’t pick your phone up again when you see the number.
 

Talent312

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"Restraining" and "NO CONTACT" orders from your Police Department served on HIM. ... that would be my "what is next" answer.
... sounds nice, but...
A phone call which is merely uninvited, and annoying or weird, is typically not sufficient to get a no-contact order.

No contact orders are typically issued by a judge who reviews a petition. It must show, typically, an act of violence, repeated threats, or a pattern of harassment which creates a reasonable fear of violence. The other party gets an expedited opportunity to be heard. OTOH, a series of nuisance phone calls can be a crime called "harassing phone calls," and result in a no-contact order.
.
 
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WinniWoman

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Just weird weird weird. If he had asked about you coming back to work or apologized for his behavior I would say the call was what it is. Nut job as you said all along. Best that you were pleasant and don’t pick your phone up again when you see the number.

Right. He keeps saying he misses having me there. He is concerned about me and wondering how I was doing. Instead of being direct and saying “I want you to come back and this is what I have to offer you. I am sorry about how I treated you...etc.”

He probably did not use his cell phone on purpose because he thought I would recognize that number. So he called from the main line in the facility.

He’s a scary person for sure.
 

Talent312

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I suggest that, if he contacts you again, you make it clear that you don't want to hear from him again.

You don't have to make it about him. You could say something like, "I'm trying to move on with my life, and talking to people from work makes that difficult for me." It's like the ol' "it's not you, it's me" line... which means "it's me not liking you."
.
 

pedro47

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To the OP, suggestion only please read Talent312 post three times. This is your answer.
 
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