# Do you recognize some TUG posters as almost always 'ornery', 'negative'



## #1 Cowboys Fan (Mar 18, 2009)

Without naming names; I have seen some trends of 
poster(s) whose responses almost always seem to have a negative tone.

I don't want to name names, or reference specific threads, because I don't want to cause a stir.

It makes me tend to discard their thoughts from the threads, because they gain less credibility with me with each of their postings.

Moreso, it makes me feel bad for them---like the folks at work that seem to harbor similar negativity.

Do you TUGgers seem to have folks here that post that you can spot as 'ornery'/'negative' as a general rule?

They seem to often chime in with comments such as:
(imaginary examples)

"...BAD resort, stay away"

"You paid way too much!"  (on a bargain site like ebay) 

"Why bother...."

"Why did you ask..."

etc.


Should we offer a 'happy' response/comeback when they post?

Or, is there a strategy that we all might employ?

Pat


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## djs (Mar 18, 2009)

Until October 2004 that description could have described half of Bostonians.


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## geekette (Mar 18, 2009)

nah, I figure I cannot fully ascertain "tone" without actually hearing what they are saying.  That is the fun of online communication - maybe I think I know how you are saying something, but I could be wrong.  

Hard to say if we're reading the same threads, so, not a clue if we're just reading same things differently or not seeing the same things.  I will say, tho, I have not detected negativity, but I will cop to periodically being ornery.  I like to think that it's part of my charm.


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## TamaraQT (Mar 18, 2009)

*Negative Posters*



#1 Cowboys Fan said:


> They seem to often chime in with comments such as:
> (imaginary examples)
> 
> "...BAD resort, stay away"
> ...


 
Well I kinda say live and let live.  I can fit some people into the negative posters category but I have come to accept them as a "devils advocate" type of response.  But then again, I havent been around here that long.  When I gain more timesharing experience, I too may become a negative poster.  I just try to accept all types of personalities.  If they become directly and personally disrespectful then I would have an issue.  But this place is where people share and voice opinions and give advice based on their knowledge and experience.  Like I said, I am still a newbie.  Maybe one day there will be a feature that you could ignore posts of certain members if that isnt already available.


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## Wonka (Mar 18, 2009)

Well, I think some folks post when they're upset about something.  Otherwise, they just read.  I'm sure I'm not the most positive person.  But, I like to read all sides of a situation.


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## DebBrown (Mar 18, 2009)

Over the years I've come to just ignore some posters, not just here but on other forums as well.  It could be negativity but also people I find annoying or have a weird sense of humor or are just plain boring.

You can't like everybody.  The sooner you come to terms with that and just ignore those you don't like, the better.  No feelings hurt!

Deb


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## Santina (Mar 18, 2009)

I feel quite the opposite. I think most Tuggers are upbeat and very helpful.


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## Stricky (Mar 18, 2009)

Part of it is the type of communication medium. Boards do not work well for sarcasm and bluntness or even hidden humor that can be picked up in voice fluctuations. People tend to message on boards the same way they talk (instead of how they would type a letter).

Of the three boards I frequent, this is by far the best. One board I am on if you say "hi I am new" they bite your head off (it seems).


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## swift (Mar 18, 2009)

I hope everyone here feels welcome. We all have something to offer each other in knowledge, support or sometimes just an ear. We do have a Be Courteous Rule but thankfully we don't have to enforce it too often as most all TUGers are pretty good folks.


Be Courteous
As we read and respond to others, disagreements are inevitable. Differing points of view are welcomed, and indeed the bbs would be a dull place without them. All users are expected and required to express their disagreements civilly. Refrain from name calling and behavior lectures. Personal attacks will not be tolerated and repeated offenses could get you banned from the bbs. Lively discussion is what the board is all about, but that is no excuse for boorish behavior or bad manners. We are assumed to all be adults. If you don't like a particular thread, stop reading it!


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## ricoba (Mar 18, 2009)

Yeah, so what....get over it!


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## 1950bing (Mar 18, 2009)

I try to see the best in everybody. Everyone has an off day every now and then. In my eyes, I find that most all people are good and can offer positive things to all things as we share the planet.


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## Timeshare Von (Mar 18, 2009)

I can be that way myself, a few days a month


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## billymach4 (Mar 18, 2009)

It is very hard to ascertain the "tone" of ones written remarks. When speaking you can alter your speech to deliver your message much easier. I also find misunderstandings occur over the phone as well when you can't see facial or body language. 

Also the other issue on the net is the plethora of acronyms to pick up. 

IMHO

Have a great day!


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## DeniseM (Mar 18, 2009)

#1 Cowboys Fan said:


> Should we offer a 'happy' response/comeback when they post?
> 
> Or, is there a strategy that we all might employ?
> 
> Pat



If it's out of line, please report it by clicking on the triangle at the bottom -  under their name.

But if it's just grouchy....


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## rickandcindy23 (Mar 18, 2009)

#1 Cowboys Fan said:


> Without naming names; I have seen some trends of
> poster(s) whose responses almost always seem to have a negative tone.
> 
> I don't want to name names, or reference specific threads, because I don't want to cause a stir.
> ...



I will try to be less grumpy.  :rofl: 

I know of one that never has anything positive to say, and I do wonder why that person posts on a timeshare lovers' site.


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## applegirl (Mar 19, 2009)

Pat,

I do know what you are saying and there is one particular TUGger who's comments are never nice or positive.  I've come to laugh at his/her responses and pretty much just ignore what they have to say since it's usually rediculous anyway.

Other than that, I don't seem to find too many posters who seem negative.  Most TUGgers seem to very down to earth people who are just trying to help each other out.  Hopefully that's your experience most of the time.

Cheers,
Janna


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## pammex (Mar 19, 2009)

I tend to find most Tuggers very helpful with lots of helpful information.  I can see where sometimes a comment could be taken wrongly due to the inability to see facial expressions and tone, as well as body language.  

I hope I give off a tactful and helpful informayion most of the time.  Remember we all have bad days and I am sure it shows in our posting as well.  

No matter what board you go on there will be posters you do not like or not like their way of posting, just do not read or ignore those....other than that...hang in there.....I find this board one of the kinder ones LOL.  Have a great day!


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## Htoo0 (Mar 19, 2009)

Guess I wouldn't know where I fit in. In real life I'm known for having a weird sense of humor, being a smart-a$$, and a quick-wit with a little friendly sarcasm tossed in. Others are correct, a lot of things I post on various forums are sometimes not entirely understood. Depending on the subject I can be negative but I hope that's not always the case. (I don't in any way feel this thread included me, I'm just musing.)


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## pranas (Mar 19, 2009)

I  find a mixture of opinions is much better than having everyone suggary and sweeet.  On this type of board, honest questions and answers are more valuable to me then sugar coated half-truths.


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## CarolF (Mar 19, 2009)

I have noticed some negativity with specific posters, but have put it down to cultural differences in communicating.  I don't automatically assume that because someones place of residence is USA (for example) that they are born and bred there.  Some cultures are just blunt and to the point in their communication.  On the other hand, if you have chosen a screen name that includes the word "crap" (for example) that is what I expect the post to contain  .


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## Bwolf (Mar 19, 2009)

Well, I've concluded that some "negativeness" I've experienced here was the work of loyal members of another board who conducted "guerilla" attacks here in an effort to disrupt this board.

I've concluded other things, but I've said enough. 

Except, I recently joined this board.


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## Transit (Mar 19, 2009)

geekette said:


> nah, I figure I cannot fully ascertain "tone" without actually hearing what they are saying.  That is the fun of online communication - maybe I think I know how you are saying something, but I could be wrong.



I have to agree. Messages that sometimes seem to have a hard tone may just be perceived that way.Some of the most informative posters are sometimes very breif and direct which may seem negative.It's hard to judge just by the written word .....but then there are some real negetive posts.


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## wackymother (Mar 19, 2009)

There are some posters where, if I see they've posted, I just have to run right over and see how cranky they are that day. :whoopie: Because they're ALWAYS cranky! It's just a question of HOW cranky!


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## pgnewarkboy (Mar 19, 2009)

There are negative posters and posts - but that is fine IMHO as long as the post does not become "hysterical".  Negative posts can be informative and positive posts can be informative.  In the past, I have objected to the use of the board to strictly vent extreme anger.


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## dmbrand (Mar 19, 2009)

Whenever there is a "short, negative" post, I envision Jeff Dunham's puppet Walter.  I picture him saying it, and it makes me laugh! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1kXOg23pGeA&feature=related


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## prosperitylove79 (Mar 19, 2009)

Personally, I always look for the reasons for negativity...something usually happens to make people unhappy, just as something usually happens to make people happy.  I feel it is important to listen to both positive and negative ideas and thoughts - it really benefits everyone to see different perspectives...just my 2cents!


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## The Conch Man (Mar 19, 2009)

*Wish all of ya's stop talking bout me!!!!     :whoopie: *


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## calgarygary (Mar 19, 2009)

I don't view TUG as a timeshare lover's board but rather a board that brings together a full spectrum.  One where novices and the experienced, those that love and despise their purchases, those within the high end systems and who own independants, within II and RCI, etc. to come and share their experiences and information.  Sometimes you will have cheerleaders, sometimes you will have those who wished they never bought.  Both bring something to the table well worth sharing.


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## #1 Cowboys Fan (Mar 19, 2009)

I didn't expect this many responses.

As was mentioned, TUG has REALLY nice people!

I just happen to notice very few exceptions, and as another poster does---I simply try to ignore them.

But I read the postings from ALL OF THE REST OF YOU!!:hysterical: 

Pat


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## M. Henley (Mar 19, 2009)

*Whoa ! !*

Whoops...


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## rickandcindy23 (Mar 19, 2009)

I figure that anyone who spends much time here must love timeshare, or why hang around us?   That is why I am here so much, because I love the concept, the resale prices, and the endless vacation possibilities that a timeshare represents.


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## bass (Mar 19, 2009)

I think posters are much more polite now then they were 4 or 5 years ago.

Nancy


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## grest (Mar 19, 2009)

DeniseM said:


> If it's out of line, please report it by clicking on the triangle at the bottom -  under their name.
> 
> But if it's just grouchy....



I didn't know that's what the triangle was for!  You learn something new every day!
Connie


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## lovearuba (Mar 19, 2009)

*Great Thread*

I have had some very unpleasant experiences dealing with some posters that have nothing better to do than challenge other posters.  When I suspect they are just naysayers, I go to their statistics and read some of their other posts to see if it is their practice or if they really feel strongly about what I've said.  It is undoubtedly that they are people with nothing better to do than poke holes in other peoples opinions.  I try to ignore them but when they gang up on you and there are multiples doing the harassment, I have to say, it truly is reminding me of the bullies in school when we were young. 

I never put up with the bullies.  I cant punch them on tug or get my big brother to have a "special talk" with them so I try to ignore them.  To vent, I pm the other folks that they harass edand we make fun of the and share a private laugh.  Oh to be young again.


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## stmartinfan (Mar 19, 2009)

As in most places, there are likely people here who just enjoy challenging others.  (Some of the longer-time posters will remember the annoying person who went by the name "GinGin" and another I can't remember!)

But I have to agree with the comment about how different language and cultural backgrounds can influence how one posts. Early in my career, I worked for a couple of years at an Air Force base in Germany, where many of my co-workers were Germany nationals.  They all spoke English fluently.  I thought I was doing a decent job, and was getting along OK with them, but they always seemed so brusque when telling me something.  After I studied enough German to become pretty fluent, I realized that they were speaking English using the "translation" of how they would have said something in German.  And German for the most part is a language without all the "softening" words and phrases many of us English speakers insert naturally.  It was nice to realize they weren't grumpy at me - just speaking English with a different style than how I learned it.


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## rickandcindy23 (Mar 19, 2009)

lovearuba said:


> I have had some very unpleasant experiences dealing with some posters that have nothing better to do than challenge other posters.  When I suspect they are just naysayers, I go to their statistics and read some of their other posts to see if it is their practice or if they really feel strongly about what I've said.  It is undoubtedly that they are people with nothing better to do than poke holes in other peoples opinions.  I try to ignore them but when they gang up on you and there are multiples doing the harassment, I have to say, it truly is reminding me of the bullies in school when we were young.
> 
> I never put up with the bullies.  I cant punch them on tug or get my big brother to have a "special talk" with them so I try to ignore them.  To vent, I pm the other folks that they harass edand we make fun of the and share a private laugh.  Oh to be young again.



Yes, I know what you mean.  I was beaten down a bit about 18 months ago on this site, so much so that I almost said, "Bye bye, TUG!"  Rick finally posted in response to the rude comments coming at me.  The posters involved were some that many of you would recognize as these grouchy, negative people.  I just had an issue with a resale company that many people here like and defend, and it really got out of hand, especially when people kept telling me I should have done my due diligence, which I had done, and they knew it.  It was very disconcerting.  

The nicer people here really make up for the grouchy ones.


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## Patri (Mar 19, 2009)

Honestly, no one stands out as negative to me. There are so many posters and this is such an upbeat site, that I don't even know who you are talking about. Sometimes ignorance is bliss.


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## DaveNV (Mar 19, 2009)

I try never to openly challenge anyone here, or to put down what they've posted.  They obviously believe what they said or they wouldn't post it.  But sometimes I will point out something someone may say that seems to be off the mark, or that may be seen in a different way.  Asking "Have you ever thought about..." is an easier way to say "I don't agree with you..." without verbally slamming someone.  It isn't about trying to beat them down, it's about trying to get them to think outside their viewpoint a bit.  I've never intended to disrespect anyone, but always intended to foster additional thought about a subject.

It's not a perfect science, but I really enjoy thoughtful forums like this where people share ideas.  In today's world, it's a great way to gain a lot of insight.  And Tuggers have taught me a tremendous amount over the last few years.  I appreciate you all -- even the cranky ones.  

Dave


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## normab (Mar 19, 2009)

I have noticed a couple of times where a response  to a post had a sarcastic tone.  It is unfortunate that anyone would be afflicted with sarcasm, it's not pretty.  When the response was to my post, I just ignored it.  Nothing else you can do.. 

I also think that here on TUG 99% of the people are helpful and insightful.  I have learned so much in the few years I have been a member.


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## talkamotta (Mar 20, 2009)

calgarygary said:


> I don't view TUG as a timeshare lover's board but rather a board that brings together a full spectrum.  .



I agree

  Even the negative posts are there for a reason and it can be a warning.  So thats a big plus.  

We are all different, its like reading different types of books-you are reading another person's thoughts.  Its an education.  

I love TUG and all the kind people that have helped me over the years.  This site has saved me much $$$ and time.  People at work and home have caught me reading different posts when I have laughed out loud.  Its entertaining.


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## Zac495 (Mar 20, 2009)

I think most TUGGERS are just so special and sweet. I guess it's because they don't wait 20 years to take a vacation! 

I know there are certain people on specific boards about specific topics who are trying to make a negative point - I ignore them THERE - but that doesn't mean I think they're not nice - they just SO disagree. I have never seen there here at the lounge.


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## pcgirl54 (Mar 20, 2009)

Most are wonderful.  We all come from many areas of expertise,budgets and tastes in travel and there is no place I have found that comes close with sharing,caring people who are a terrific resource.

However correcting others in an unkind way is not appreciated. Sometimes I take offense when a post of mine is questioned in a way that seems to be  really super nit picky. My experience may not be the same as yours but that does not make it untrue. 

 I have been with Tug for more than 10 yrs. I have seen things get out of hand at one point causing long time members to stop posting or create another BBS because of some posters who were extremely confrontational. This is why some topics are banned. Moderators work hard enough and give of their time they do not need to be referees.


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## Passepartout (Mar 20, 2009)

Gosh, now I'm almost afraid to post anything for fear that someone might think I'm ornery. I am. And curmudgeonly. So in case anyone feels like calling me out on it, I'll plead guilty in advance.

Jim Ricks


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## geekette (Mar 20, 2009)

normab said:


> It is unfortunate that anyone would be afflicted with sarcasm, it's not pretty.



uh oh, I am definitely afflicted with sarcasm.     I do try to rein it in and play nice.  :ignore:


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## m61376 (Mar 20, 2009)

The really negative posts (and posters) are few and far between. But, as others have indicated, if you cast off their arrogance or sarcasm and take their tone with a grain of salt, they sometimes offer an interesting perspective in their dissent. Just skip the negativity and accept what they say as a difference of opinion and, at times, you at least see the flip side to an argument.

Personally, while I wouldn't choose such posters as friends, I am glad that they post, because I look at Tug as an education and they usually spark interesting debates. Your mother's old saying that "you can win more friends with honey than with vinegar..." is of course true but, for some people, that's their way of expressing themselves, especially on an anonymous forum where they can get away with it without taking flak from family/friends/co-workers, etc..


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## Eric in McLean (Mar 20, 2009)

Isn't your post a thinly veiled disguise at saying you are better than the "negative" person?  You feel bad for them?  That sounds pretty condescending to me.

Why is a negative person less credible?  If a glass a half full, isn't it also half empty?  Two ways of saying the exact same thing and both are equally credible.


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## AwayWeGo (Mar 20, 2009)

*Common Sense Solution To Perceived Negativity.*

I mostly just take what I like & leave the rest. 

Now & then (seldom) somebody might get my goat -- but if so, then likely as not I was asking for it. 

And if I ever (rarely) apply any heat myself, I try to take care just to singe & not burn. 

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​


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## Htoo0 (Mar 20, 2009)

As I stated earlier, in real life I'm pretty bad. (Not that I compare to them and their writing staff but think of a Letterman/Leno type. And BTW, I developed my 'thing' long before anyone knew who they were.) DW is always telling me to quit being such a smart*** but my response is, "I was born an *** and I'd rather be a smart*** than a dumb***!" (Not that I'm not both occasionally. ) But as has been mentioned, in person it's easy to tell I'm just messing with people (even though it may be true). I try to be more careful on the 'net but as one example, on another forum a new female member tagged herself as, "Not another dumb blonde!"  There are extremely few female members on this very large forum and one of the longtime female members is a sweet and funny blond so I posted a welcome message quoting her tag line with a message of, "That's OK, we like dumb brunettes and redheads too!" She wanted to know where in Oklahoma did I live so she could come kick my 'tail'. We get along fine now, joke back and forth and all that. But it can be difficult to clearly understand intent relying only the written word, particularly without having ever met the writer.


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## Zac495 (Mar 20, 2009)

Patri said:


> Honestly, no one stands out as negative to me. There are so many posters and this is such an upbeat site, that I don't even know who you are talking about. Sometimes ignorance is bliss.



How stupid can you be? You idiot! You've missed the negative people! Look harder.

Kidding:hysterical:


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## swift (Mar 20, 2009)

Eric in McLean said:


> Isn't your post a thinly veiled disguise at saying you are better than the "negative" person?  You feel bad for them?  That sounds pretty condescending to me.
> 
> Why is a negative person less credible?  If a glass a half full, isn't it also half empty?  Two ways of saying the exact same thing and both are equally credible.



I think what the poster was trying to say was that sometimes if you try to take the emotion out of the post and read it as someone being a Devils Advocate it can be a good thing. I do have to say thou that it is hard to take the emotion out. On our union negotiating team we have someone that plays that part often but she also strengthens us before we sit before the real guns ready for what may be fired out at us.

Definition of a Devils Advocate:
A devil's advocate is someone who takes a position, sometimes one he or she disagrees with, for the sake of argument. This process can be used to test the quality of the original argument and identify weaknesses in its structure.


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## pgnewarkboy (Mar 20, 2009)

Most of the people who post on this board have no cause to be GENERALLY negative .  We are lucky that we can afford timeshares and enjoy them.  That means we are pretty affluent by world standards.  The worst timeshare experience in the world of timesharing cannot compare to the misery that most of the world must deal with every day.  Perspective will set a person free from their own overblown anger and worry and pessimism.


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## theo (Mar 20, 2009)

My own view is that accurate facts, well and clearly stated, and the exchange of accumulated subject knowledge is *far* more important than "tone" on a timeshare site. It's not a "Dear Abby" column, after all.


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## pgnewarkboy (Mar 20, 2009)

We are not a dear abby column but we are a community.  Clear facts accurately stated are always welcome.  Civility is the best way to get a point across. Once again, there are no rules about negativity on this board- nor should there be any such rules.  Tone does count because it affects others.  In the family, workplace, community, it is always better to provide criticism in a constructive way.  Besides, negativity harshes my mellow!


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## Patri (Mar 20, 2009)

*


Zac495 said:



			How stupid can you be? You idiot! You've missed the negative people! Look harder.

Kidding:hysterical:
		
Click to expand...

*
Whew! Glad I read your post to the end.


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## mamiecarter (Mar 20, 2009)

*GROWL,SNARL, Grump,Grump!*

I can't help myself. How about you? Confess and get over it!


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## geekette (Mar 21, 2009)

Well, ok, but only since the work week sucked rocks:

)(@#$*(%&*@$(@$)@*$$_@   AND ANOTHER THING, (*$*@$^&)@$  you little (bleeeep).

wow, that was fun!  Now I'll go outside and ()#$&*$&  the )*(#%&*@$&@*&#$) out of the weeds.


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## Kona Lovers (Mar 21, 2009)

Of everything I've seen and read here, this place is very tame compared to others.  For comparison, try your favorite NFL team's message board!  Talk about emotion!

Marty


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## Egret1986 (Oct 12, 2009)

*In a word, YES!*



#1 Cowboys Fan said:


> Without naming names; I have seen some trends of
> poster(s) whose responses almost always seem to have a negative tone.
> 
> I don't want to name names, or reference specific threads, because I don't want to cause a stir.
> ...




I got "hit" by one last night.  Boy, I didn't see that one coming.


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## chriskre (Oct 12, 2009)

And don't even think about sharing anything that might skirt the rules or the self appointed "timeshare policeman" might come up and give you a ticket.   
And then tow your car.  :annoyed: 
And then lock you up and throw away the key.  :ignore:

Personally I like to learn the little tricks and know I might get slammed for sharing one or two by the nay sayers.  Who cares.  Share away anyway.  We all learn.  

It sure makes for a lively thread though, you have to admit.


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## toby9116 (Oct 12, 2009)

I thought they had nothing informative to say and wanted to drive up their # of posts so if they ever came up with a thought with substance they may not be called a shill.


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## swift (Oct 12, 2009)

I can't see anything good coming from a thread like this.


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## Kal (Oct 12, 2009)

stmartinfan said:


> ...Some of the longer-time posters will remember the annoying person who went by the name "GinGin"....


 
We need to speak kindly of the dead but it really couldn't get any worse!  Still can remember her boasting about living in a single wide in the Ohio back woods with a shotgun, loaded and ready!  What a work!


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## Jaybee (Oct 12, 2009)

*"Gin-Gin"  (OT)*

Did she actually die?  
Does anyone know who decided we should never speak ill of the dead?  Does dying bring some kind of sainthood?  Or is it just a superstition?  I doesn't make sense to me, when someone was a really bad person...maybe even a child molester, or a murderer, a spousal abuser...ad nauseum, but no one should speak negatively about him/her.  I didn't really intend to go so far off topic, but I do wonder....


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## Pat H (Oct 12, 2009)

Jaybee said:


> Did she actually die?
> Does anyone know who decided we should never speak ill of the dead?  Does dying bring some kind of sainthood?  Or is it just a superstition?  I doesn't make sense to me, when someone was a really bad person...maybe even a child molester, or a murderer, a spousal abuser...ad nauseum, but no one should speak negatively about him/her.  I didn't really intend to go so far off topic, but I do wonder....



It's like the widow who suddenly makes her late husband a saint when he was nothing but an SOB when he was alive. 

I think GinGin is still alive and just as nasty as always.


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## Talent312 (Oct 12, 2009)

swift said:


> I can't see anything good coming from a thread like this.



And yet, there's 65 or so posts to this thread.
Who'd a thought that negativity could be such a contentious issue? 
---------------
As you can see, I'm a very negative poster, but I keep it under wraps... mostly.


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## Kal (Oct 13, 2009)

Gin-Gin is probably still livin' at her old haunt on 666 BeeAch Way.


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## Htoo0 (Oct 13, 2009)

Jaybee said:


> Did she actually die?
> Does anyone know who decided we should never speak ill of the dead?  Does dying bring some kind of sainthood?  Or is it just a superstition?  I doesn't make sense to me, when someone was a really bad person...maybe even a child molester, or a murderer, a spousal abuser...ad nauseum, but no one should speak negatively about him/her.  I didn't really intend to go so far off topic, but I do wonder....



Personally, for those really bad people I prefer to forget them. Why give them the satisfaction of living on in infamy?  (I may say, "the @*#$$ that murdered John Lennon" but I don't care to remember his name.) Even annoying people I just tend to forget about. Not that I expect (or want) people to miss me when I'm gone.


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## EAM (Oct 13, 2009)

Jaybee said:


> Did she actually die?
> Does anyone know who decided we should never speak ill of the dead?  Does dying bring some kind of sainthood?  Or is it just a superstition?  I doesn't make sense to me, when someone was a really bad person...maybe even a child molester, or a murderer, a spousal abuser...ad nauseum, but no one should speak negatively about him/her.  I didn't really intend to go so far off topic, but I do wonder....


I think the phrase "do not speak ill of the dead" has been around at least since the Roman Empire.   In the Christian tradition, calumny (negative false remarks) and detraction (negative and unnecessary true remarks) are sins, and the dead are as entitled to a good reputation as the living.  See http://www.trosch.org/for/scan/har-detr.htm for more details.  

Also, the dead are not able to defend themselves against libel or slander.  It is not polite to attack someone who is defenseless, so it is not polite to say or write something negative about a dead person.  In some states, though, the estate of the deceased or his/her heirs might be able to take legal action to protect the reputation of the deceased.


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## pgnewarkboy (Oct 13, 2009)

EAM said:


> I think the phrase "do not speak ill of the dead" has been around at least since the Roman Empire.   In the Christian tradition, calumny (negative false remarks) and detraction (negative and unnecessary true remarks) are sins, and the dead are as entitled to a good reputation as the living.  See http://www.trosch.org/for/scan/har-detr.htm for more details.
> 
> Also, the dead are not able to defend themselves against libel or slander.  It is not polite to attack someone who is defenseless, so it is not polite to say or write something negative about a dead person.  In some states, though, the estate of the deceased or his/her heirs might be able to take legal action to protect the reputation of the deceased.



I think we need to rethink what it means to be dead in this brave new world of ours.  I recently saw a bit on 60 minutes about agencies that represent "dead" celebrities - often bringing in more money than when they were alive.  Einstein is a top earner.  As you mentioned above, the dead also sue for misappropriation of their intellectual property.

With "youtube" etc. etc. the "dead" will live on in digital form, possibly for eternity.


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## ondeadlin (Oct 13, 2009)

I've sworn off talking about Marriott developer purchases and the option of trading for Marriott points because it brings out the worst in people (including me, perhaps).

But the vast majority of interactions I've had on TUG and with Tuggers have been overwhelmingly positive.


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## Stricky (Oct 13, 2009)

Everything I read is very positive. Of course it might have something to do with the fact I have a few people on the "ignore user" list.


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## laurac260 (Oct 13, 2009)

Stricky said:


> Part of it is the type of communication medium. Boards do not work well for sarcasm and bluntness or even hidden humor that can be picked up in voice fluctuations. People tend to message on boards the same way they talk (instead of how they would type a letter).
> 
> Of the three boards I frequent, this is by far the best. One board I am on if you say "hi I am new" they bite your head off (it seems).



I'll name names.  Board names anyway.  Years ago I was on Weight Watchers online.  There I encountered some of the most vile, hateful people I have ever met.  Snarky is a frequently used word on that site.  Some of these people have been on the WW boards for years, which made me wonder, does being perpetually fat make them bitter, or does being perpetually bitter make them fat?  

At any rate, I have found people to be for the most part friendly on this board. I have met a couple that seem to be in perpetual attack mode, (one of which I have put on an ignore list....yes, this board has that ability).  Otherwise, I think people in general are pleasant, and mean to be helpful.


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## Floridaski (Oct 13, 2009)

There has been only one Tug poster that could get under my skin - most know him as having Steamboat in his user name, I may get blasted for mentioning part of his user name - but I feel brave.  He has since left the TUG, or I think he has left -  I have say thank you for that!

This is the only person I ever saw that would routinely insult just about anybody - regardless of who you were.  I am thick skinned but - everyone has their limits  

Other then this one person, everybody can get a little testy sometimes, but most of the time they are not rude.  I think the moderators do a great job of keeping the posters "civil" - so hats off to these folks. 

It has to be hard to try to determine what is "civil" and what is just unacceptable.  I always try to think - if I could not say this in public, then why should I say this even on a internet forum.  Not everyone thinks in this fashion, and I have a few folks that I just do not read their posts.

But if someone is just a little "grumpy" in tone, but still provides valuable info - then I am thankful that they take the time to share.


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## AwayWeGo (Oct 13, 2009)

*Nobody's Perfect.*




Floridaski said:


> There has been only one Tug poster that could get under my skin - most know him as having Steamboat in his user name, I may get blasted for mentioning part of his user name - but I feel brave.  He has since left the TUG, or I think he has left -  I have say thank you for that!


Shux, The Steamer is -- was -- a TUG Lifetime Member, so he must have been doing something right at some time in the past -- at least, that is, till he went off the deep end. 

Most of the trouble, I think, had to do with TUG-BBS entries sent in via an alias.  What may well have started off all in good fun could escalate past the threshold of good humor & then verge well into the realm of no fun for anybody.  

Eventually the Grand Pro blew the whistle & that was that. 

I don't think there's much point in rehashing this sort of thing, except possibly as a reminder to all that continued enjoyment of TUG-BBS depends greatly on tolerance & restraint & good humor & maturity all round. 

-- Alan Cole, McLean (Fairfax County), Virginia, USA.​


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## UWSurfer (Oct 13, 2009)

laurac260 said:


> I'll name names.  Board names anyway.  Years ago I was on Weight Watchers online.  There I encountered some of the most vile, hateful people I have ever met.  Snarky is a frequently used word on that site.  Some of these people have been on the WW boards for years, which made me wonder, does being perpetually fat make them bitter, or does being perpetually bitter make them fat?



I'm not defending hateful people, but note with WW's the goal is to loose your weight and become a "Lifetime" member which allows you to continue going to meetings and doing the things to keep the weight off without paying anything further, so long as you stay within 2 lbs of the goal weight number.   Unfortunately loosing the weight and keeping it off IS a lifetime of work for many of us.


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## Zac495 (Oct 13, 2009)

Floridaski said:


> There has been only one Tug poster that could get under my skin - most know him as having Steamboat in his user name, I may get blasted for mentioning part of his user name - but I feel brave.  He has since left the TUG, or I think he has left -  I have say thank you for that!
> 
> This is the only person I ever saw that would routinely insult just about anybody - regardless of who you were.  I am thick skinned but - everyone has their limits
> 
> ...



I will happily remind everyone that steamboat/timesharedude/eric(NOT Marriott Eric) attacked me personally on pms. I was attacked for my appearance - nothing about my opinions of timeshares. 

The moderators got rid of him.

Every once in a while someone irritates me here - but rarely - mostly the nicest people I've met - and I have MET many tuggers in person.

I will risk the steamboat jerks for the wonderful tugger- boats .:hysterical:


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## NWL (Oct 13, 2009)

Zac495 said:


> I will happily remind everyone that steamboat/timesharedude/eric(NOT Marriott Eric) attacked me personally on pms. I was attacked for my appearance - nothing about my opinions of timeshares.
> 
> The moderators got rid of him.



He ("Eric") showed up a few days ago on the Marriott forum. Still ornery! 

Cheers!


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## Phill12 (Oct 13, 2009)

Kal said:


> We need to speak kindly of the dead but it really couldn't get any worse!  Still can remember her boasting about living in a single wide in the Ohio back woods with a shotgun, loaded and ready!  What a work!




 As a member on TripAdvisor few years ago and having many forum talks with KenK and him recommending Tug to me brought me to this site. 

 Later I found Redweek and stopped in once in a while and Had KenK warn me of GinGin that I had never heard about. I was told to be careful because this women was mean and always went after anyone that had different opinion than hers. 

 Within two weeks of becoming a member I had hassles with this self appointed Redweek spokes person. I had a few Tug members that also went on Redweek pm me on Tug and also warned me that she had been banned from Tug and also TS4MS for same treatment to other members.

 This was one of the main reasons for me very seldom going on Redweek and not renewing my membership when it runs out. I do hear from some members by e-mail and things going on then I will jump on and read some post.

 This fighting with one person everytime I posted trying to help just became old like to many members that left before me. This is suppose to be enjoyable to relate to other timeshare owners and try to help and when it isn't its time to move on. 


 PHIL


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## swift (Oct 14, 2009)

I just don't see any good in bringing up old garbage, rehashing past issues or opening doors to hurt someone's feelings.

I am closing this because I believe this falls under the Be Courteous Rule.

*Refrain from name calling and behavior lectures. Personal attacks will not be tolerated and repeated offenses could get you banned from the bbs.*


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